Please tell me I am not crazy

[Rekeca 0]

I am so disappointed. I had my follow up pysch eval today and the psychiatrist thought that I should get my surgery deferred for about 6 months to a year so that I can get some counseling. Is he crazy? He stated that I express an overall low level of life satisfaction. Damn right I do, I am big as hell, I have health problems and I hate the way I look and feel. Is that low enough for you? He also stated that I need to work on my personality because I need to be more assertive, and I have areas in my life that I am not happy with HEALTH, SELF ESTEEM, GOALS, MONEY and LOVE. Hell I think that i am part of the norm and not the exception. Hell I am fat so I have low self esteem, health wise, I am not happy with my diabetes, high blood pressure, PCOS, and high cholesterol. my goals, yea I would have thought I would have finished my college degree by now, but I haven't, I have a few more classes to go, Money, IF you are not bringing in a 6 figure income, then most people are not happy with where they are with their financial situation. Love, I am married and I love my husband but do we have the best relationship right now, we are going through a rough patch, so right now, I am not happy with my husband, but I married him and promised to love throught the good and the bad. Now to give him credit, I feel like I can use someone to talk to and seeing a therapist would probably benefit me to have someone to talk to that is objective, hell every body should have someone to talk to whether it be a friend, therapist or what ever, But to say that I need to defer my surgery because I am not happy wow.... So to all of you guys that had the surgery, where you happy with your life? Did the surgery enhance your self esteem, relationships, health, more opportunity to get promotions because you are more confidant and smaller.

He said I was welcome to get a second opinion and I have my report and I will do just that. I was upset and crying but I will get a second opinion. I just don't think he was correct in his assessment...............So now does anyone live in the Charlotte NC area and now of a therapist I can go to for my pysch eval.

Thanks for letting me vent.

[TijuanaPlication 87]

Hi Rekeca, sorry to hear about your problems. I don't know about a psych in the NC area, but have you thought about just trying to grin and bear it and be ultra positive when you go for your next eval? I don't wanna sound patronizing or anything but maybe you can do it just to get your date - just try and be positive and think of how well things can be afterwards.

Have a read of NtvTxn's post for some inspiration http://www.verticalsleevetalk.com/topic/16115-10-months-ago-today-925-lbs-gone/

Good luck with your next appointment and I hope you get the outcome you're after.

[Rootman 1,101]

Well, we are certainly not doctors or physiologists here but it sounds like to me that someone IS nuts - and I don't think it's you. If you are super obese, have 4 co-morbidities you list then by all means it WILL effect your personality and even your mind. It's not going to do you much good to be all perky and happy laying in a hospital dieing from a stroke bed or worse yet a casket.

What is your BMI? Can you get a second opinion or ask for a appeal? I think if you are honest like you seem to be here they may wave the psych eval and move on. Check it out.

[Margaret 4]

I would put on a happier face and get another psychologist to evaluate you and just press on. don't give up on this. Just do what you need to do and get the evaluation in your favor no matter how you have to do it!

I am so disappointed. I had my follow up pysch eval today and the psychiatrist thought that I should get my surgery deferred for about 6 months to a year so that I can get some counseling. Is he crazy? He stated that I express an overall low level of life satisfaction. Damn right I do, I am big as hell, I have health problems and I hate the way I look and feel. Is that low enough for you? He also stated that I need to work on my personality because I need to be more assertive, and I have areas in my life that I am not happy with HEALTH, SELF ESTEEM, GOALS, MONEY and LOVE. Hell I think that i am part of the norm and not the exception. Hell I am fat so I have low self esteem, health wise, I am not happy with my diabetes, high blood pressure, PCOS, and high cholesterol. my goals, yea I would have thought I would have finished my college degree by now, but I haven't, I have a few more classes to go, Money, IF you are not bringing in a 6 figure income, then most people are not happy with where they are with their financial situation. Love, I am married and I love my husband but do we have the best relationship right now, we are going through a rough patch, so right now, I am not happy with my husband, but I married him and promised to love throught the good and the bad. Now to give him credit, I feel like I can use someone to talk to and seeing a therapist would probably benefit me to have someone to talk to that is objective, hell every body should have someone to talk to whether it be a friend, therapist or what ever, But to say that I need to defer my surgery because I am not happy wow.... So to all of you guys that had the surgery, where you happy with your life? Did the surgery enhance your self esteem, relationships, health, more opportunity to get promotions because you are more confidant and smaller.

He said I was welcome to get a second opinion and I have my report and I will do just that. I was upset and crying but I will get a second opinion. I just don't think he was correct in his assessment...............So now does anyone live in the Charlotte NC area and now of a therapist I can go to for my pysch eval.

Thanks for letting me vent.

[KellyL 173]

I am so sorry, that truly does suck!!!! I have to agree with you on everything you said, cuz our weight does affect so many aspects of our lives, It affects our happiness, self-esteem, health, marriages, all relationships. And it can also be a vicious cycle, weight leads to depression, mobility problems, health problems, relationship problems, self esteem problems. This surgery could stop the cycle and improve so many areas of your ife. I don't really understand exactly what they are looking for in those evaluations. It kind of pisses me off that someone that doesn't even know you, talks to you for an hr, gets to decide the fate of you getting to have a life changing (and saving imo) surgery!!!!!

I would not give up though!! Get another opinion, appeal it, whatever it takes if you have decided this is what you are going to do. This is just one example of jumping thru hoops insurance companies make people do to get this surgery. Don't let it get you down further, let it make you work harder. A lot of folks have gone thru similar things, so you are not alone. I never got to the psyche eval but I've had 3 different Ins Co deny me surgery due to exclusions to weight loss surgeries. Another Ins Co would have pd but only for lapband or RNY. I don't feel those surgeries are for me. And I had to cancel a surgery date due to no financing when I was trying to self pay a different time. So I know how frustrating this can be. Don't give up!

[Rekeca 0]

I think I will be getting A second opinion. I have come too far and have spent to much money to be held up. I am just going to start researching someone else that can do my second evaluation. Thanks for the responses.

[Rainydayz 27]

That doesn't make any sense. In my insurance it says that "depression stemming from obesity does not count as clinical depression" or something to that effect. Of course we are depressed. We are obese! My psych eval was today. After all the questions he told me that the purpose of a psych eval was to weed out the people who were getting surgery for the wrong reasons, such as those who had unrealistic expectations that the surgery would solve ALL their problems in life, or people who were being abused because they were overweight or something like that. I hope you find another psychologist and get your approval.

[loris 6]

perhaps your surgeon can refer you to a psych? I got referalls to my nut, psych and a PCP (we moved, so I didn't have one here) from my surgeon's office, and have been very happy with all of them as they are all supportive of my having WLS. I have a BMI of 50, so they should be! I doubt my old PCP would have been.

good luck!

[snowfie9 6]

The psych evaluation is not designed to determine if you're crazy, it's to determine if it's SAFE for you to have the surgery. My nutritionist told me a story about a client she had way back before they had psych evals. She got a bypass and she lost a LOT of weight and she started getting compliments from people she worked for. She also had a history of childhood sexual/physical abuse and having a man compliment her on her looks triggered something REALLY bad. The psychologist basicly told the surgeon "You need to reverse this or I guarantee she is going to commit suicide".

There is a lot of emotion and distress associated with our self image. The pysch evaluation is not to determine if you're CRAZY (and as far as I know mental illness such as depression and bipolar disorder are not a disqualifying condition), it's to make sure you're safe.

Maybe you need the extra counseling. Maybe you don't. But something in the evaluation merited caution and that's not the end of the world.

[Swiftflow 6]

I think I will be getting A second opinion. I have come too far and have spent to much money to be held up. I am just going to start researching someone else that can do my second evaluation. Thanks for the responses.

Definately go for the 2nd opinion. Call bariatric docs in your area to find out referrals that are aware of WLS and the full benefits as well as challenges. WLS can be trying emotionally and you want to prepare yoursef for that--in fact you may read up on it before your next visit to show you are aware and educated to the psycological effects of WLS. You want to be clear on your reasons for loosing weight and have a plan on how you are going to use your WLS as a tool on your journey--also be ready to talk about your plan for dealing with the psycological effects of WLS. Depending on the day, the circumstances, and the doctor's own prejudices any one of us could have had that same result. Keep in mind my goal here is not to coach you on getting through the eval (some people do end up waiting if there are other personal issues to work through first--and thats ok too)--just for any WLS you should have a clear plan and goals lined up and talk with the Doc about them--make sure you know what your getting into BUT you do have to communicate that confidence to the doc.

I was self pay and did not have to go through this red tape, but I went through the steps of getting myself prepared mentally anyway because I wanted to succeed long term. Best of luck to you in your journey!

[crosswind 134]

I am so disappointed. I had my follow up pysch eval today and the psychiatrist thought that I should get my surgery deferred for about 6 months to a year so that I can get some counseling. Is he crazy? He stated that I express an overall low level of life satisfaction. Damn right I do, I am big as hell, I have health problems and I hate the way I look and feel. Is that low enough for you? He also stated that I need to work on my personality because I need to be more assertive, and I have areas in my life that I am not happy with HEALTH, SELF ESTEEM, GOALS, MONEY and LOVE. Hell I think that i am part of the norm and not the exception. Hell I am fat so I have low self esteem, health wise, I am not happy with my diabetes, high blood pressure, PCOS, and high cholesterol. my goals, yea I would have thought I would have finished my college degree by now, but I haven't, I have a few more classes to go, Money, IF you are not bringing in a 6 figure income, then most people are not happy with where they are with their financial situation. Love, I am married and I love my husband but do we have the best relationship right now, we are going through a rough patch, so right now, I am not happy with my husband, but I married him and promised to love throught the good and the bad. Now to give him credit, I feel like I can use someone to talk to and seeing a therapist would probably benefit me to have someone to talk to that is objective, hell every body should have someone to talk to whether it be a friend, therapist or what ever, But to say that I need to defer my surgery because I am not happy wow.... So to all of you guys that had the surgery, where you happy with your life? Did the surgery enhance your self esteem, relationships, health, more opportunity to get promotions because you are more confidant and smaller.

He said I was welcome to get a second opinion and I have my report and I will do just that. I was upset and crying but I will get a second opinion. I just don't think he was correct in his assessment...............So now does anyone live in the Charlotte NC area and now of a therapist I can go to for my pysch eval.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Oh fer chrissakes just go to Mexico. This is the kind of crap I just can not stand. Who is this person to tell you to *WAIT* and *BE FAT ANOTHER SIX MONTHS* to see if you get in a better mood?

It's beyond comprehension. Just go to Mexico, get your sleeve and get your aftercare from the regular doctors and not the crazy people who have no idea what it feels like to be fat.

Gah.

[cwalker 12]

I am so disappointed. I had my follow up pysch eval today and the psychiatrist thought that I should get my surgery deferred for about 6 months to a year so that I can get some counseling. Is he crazy? He stated that I express an overall low level of life satisfaction. Damn right I do, I am big as hell, I have health problems and I hate the way I look and feel. Is that low enough for you? He also stated that I need to work on my personality because I need to be more assertive, and I have areas in my life that I am not happy with HEALTH, SELF ESTEEM, GOALS, MONEY and LOVE. Hell I think that i am part of the norm and not the exception. Hell I am fat so I have low self esteem, health wise, I am not happy with my diabetes, high blood pressure, PCOS, and high cholesterol. my goals, yea I would have thought I would have finished my college degree by now, but I haven't, I have a few more classes to go, Money, IF you are not bringing in a 6 figure income, then most people are not happy with where they are with their financial situation. Love, I am married and I love my husband but do we have the best relationship right now, we are going through a rough patch, so right now, I am not happy with my husband, but I married him and promised to love throught the good and the bad. Now to give him credit, I feel like I can use someone to talk to and seeing a therapist would probably benefit me to have someone to talk to that is objective, hell every body should have someone to talk to whether it be a friend, therapist or what ever, But to say that I need to defer my surgery because I am not happy wow.... So to all of you guys that had the surgery, where you happy with your life? Did the surgery enhance your self esteem, relationships, health, more opportunity to get promotions because you are more confidant and smaller.

He said I was welcome to get a second opinion and I have my report and I will do just that. I was upset and crying but I will get a second opinion. I just don't think he was correct in his assessment...............So now does anyone live in the Charlotte NC area and now of a therapist I can go to for my pysch eval.

Thanks for letting me vent.

The guy must be a idot!! Of course being obese makes you feel unhappy, unsociable with self esteem issues or it did me. My pysch eval was to see if I could follow the program not dissect my life. RUN to a second opinion..but research or get your surgeon to refer you to one he works with. Hugs!

[Eureka-C 20]

As a graduate student who does a lot of psych evals, I would recommend you get a second opinion. I would not recommend you try to hide your depression/self-esteem issues related to your obesity. I would focus on how you believe your life will change, realistic expectations and goals. You can also ask about their background in bariatric assessment. I personally had my psych eval from a doctor who has been working with clients with eating disorders for the last 3 years. On the other side of the coin, this surgery can play havoc with your hormones and send someone who already has a propensity for depression into a downward spiral. If you are the least bit unsure, I would recommend you make 2 appointments with a therapist specializing in eating disorders and depression. In those two appointments, you can evaluate yourself more critically and determine what, if any, support would be beneficial to you before and after the surgery.

[Rekeca 0]

I have completed all of my pre-op testing and I have one more visit left to complete my 6 mos weight management requirements. I have already got some names of other therapist in my area and I will be calling them tomorrow. I have never wanted anything so badly in my life and I am going to fight for my rights. Thanks for giving me your insights. That is why I ove these boards.

[InProgress 3]

I agree with most everyone else on this thread but I have another option to add. Have you talked to your surgeon? If the surgeon suggested the place for the psych evaluation, chances are they already have the report and probably do regardless. Many insurances don't require the psych evaluation - it's the doc who does and he/she has the power to ignore it! I stressed over my psych evaluation & my husband even suggested I not go during pms. Lol. I think our moods do fluctuate on a daily basis and I've honestly never met anyone (male or female) who doesn't have that issue. Regardless, (and I know this sounds bad but I'm typing on my phone so bear with me), your doc wants his money and the psych wants his. Obviously the psych would like more of your money but the surgeon wants his now. I know that's coming off condescending and I don't mean it that way. I'm just suggesting that you call your surgeon and explain the situation and see if that precludes you from having the surgery. You may be able to do counselling while you're prepping for surgery or he may ignore it altogether. It's worth a shot. Good luck!