Should I ???

[jeffrey 3]

I feel a sense of dread being lifted off my shoulders at the thought of not telling.?!! I think it would be so much easier that way- not to have to face their judgment. I'll have to convince my husband to "allow" me not to tell anyone because he always holds me accountable and wants me to be honest at all times. He means well, but he's hardheaded/ lol.

Honey, You have a right to your privacy.!!! Your husband needs to settle down and not be so judgmental about what constitutes honesty. Does he tell everyone about every private body function on a daily basis? I mean, really, you decide how you feel about your personal right to privacy, and let him decide about his. You are very brave and wise to be seeking a reasonable solution to a serious health problem. Have the surgery, if anyone asks about your weight loss just say you are trying to achieve a healthier weight and are working on diet and exercise, and appreciate their support in helping you achieve your health goals and maintain them. There are hundreds of ways people achieve healthy weights, and, it's just not any one else's business to know and judge your choices.

Sounds like you are surrounded by family you feel are judging you. Give yourself a break. This on-line support group should give you some relief from all that. Well meaning or not, it sounds like this potential judgmental atmosphere is weighing heavier on you than the surgery itself. You may need to carve out this private place for you and only you! This is a nice group and provides so much support.

I am facing the same issues--am scheduled for April 18!!!- and have decided that for now, only my husband and adult daughter will know. When I am on the other side and see how I (emphasis on I) feel about it, will decide then whether to share this personal decision with anyone else. Until then, it is not for my husband or daughter to share this with anyone, and they won't. Neither will they push me or make me feel like I am being less than honest by maintaining my right to privacy. In this crazy world of reality TV shows and confessionals, the idea of privacy may seem quaint. Well, it's not!

Good luck to you! I admire your courage and wish you all the best!

[GA Girl Best in the World 4]

Great advice Jeffrey !!! I agree....

[heavynomore 0]

I can relate... I have my surgery this Friday April 8. My husband knows and a very close friend or two. My parents know I was considring the sleeve months back and knew I was having insurance issues.

I'm a type 1 diabetic and my insurance does not support weigh loss surgeries for Type 1 diabetics...so I'm going to TJ Mexico to have it done.

I mentioned briefly to my mom about going to Mexico and I knew she was skeptical. So I did not tell her I was booked and confirmed.

I did not want her to worry.

My parents called 2 weeks ago and said they were going on vacaton for 2 weeks from April 2 - April 16. So they will be out of country the week before and the week after. It worked out great!

When they get back I'll done and home and have already completed my first week of liquid post-op diet.

I'll see how I feel about when I decide to tell tell them. I know I will not see them until 2 weeks post-op at the earliest. Unless I tell my mom when she gets home and she might want to some up to visit with me.

[SophieJaneB 92]

Rock on Jeffrey! Thank you for that encouragement! You are right, this is my right to privacy and no one should try to take that away from me!

[jeffrey 3]

Rock on Jeffrey! Thank you for that encouragement! You are right, this is my right to privacy and no one should try to take that away from me!

Well, I did it. April 18, Dr. Jawad (Ocala and Orlando). Pretty intense, but once I got away from the hospital, was down to Tylenol for painkilling. Doing ridiculously well. By Saturday even had lunch date with my husband and sipped a few spoonsfull of clear broth. I will admit--the first 48 hours were tough. Some nausea, but mostly doubt. Wondering what in the hell I did to myself. But, now, one week later, I am on top of the world and looking forward to my new life.

I would encourage people to research, research, research. Plan, plan, plan. I have found many fairly healthy Protein smoothies and powders which taste fine and work well for me. Take it slow--if you are good on Clear liquids but feel icky on full liquids, just take a step back. You can even get Protein in Water now!!!

I have been at a friend's home without wireless, so will write more later. And, on the privacy issue? I decided to tell my two adult sisters, who were wonderfully supportive (as I knew they would be). They took my gall bladder during the surgery, which gives me an opening to let my potentially critical mother in on the fact that I have had surgery (I won't lie--just might parcel out the "truth" as it works best for me).

Good luck Sophie Jane. BTW--I am a middle ages, post menopausal woman in spite of the name.

[BajaMedGroup 6]

Unless you have a medical condition which prevents you from having the surgery, my advice is to do it. This is a very safe procedure that is life-changing. Aside from looking 'better', you will be SO MUCH healthier.

The complications are very few, and the rewards are too many to count...that is what I tell my patients!!

So go ahead and 'take that vacation'...you will be glad you did.

Best of luck!!