Rock Bottom

[kellyw74 258]

My surgeon would do the exact same thing! You can not even be 1lb over the goal weight that he sets for you or he will send you home and not do the surgery!

A lot of people don't like him and think he is to blunt and "as a matter of fact", but he really is just looking out for my best interest. I want someone who is going to treat me like that and not just be like "I will operate on anyone"!!

That means that I will be very well taken care of and be in great hands. If I am not ready, then don't do it. I would not want to be very sick or worse, die! That is all he was trying to keep from happening and I am glad that you understand that.

I am glad that my dr. is the same way. Maybe we have the same surgeon! LOL

Kelly

[Billy363627 15]

keep your head up girl..The carb thing is one of the hardest things to break!! I do feel soo bad for you though.. to be that close and yet soo far away...it really sucks . You can do it thought!!! You will get a new date and stay focused on the goal you will make it I promise you..:welldoneclap:

[swizzly 901]

Sorry, certainly didn't mean to come over as hysterical. This just hit on a huge personal nerve and I ranted away freely instead of being more measured in my response.

[fatBgone 6]

More than anything, I just want people to learn from my mistakes. I didn't set out to dupe the doctor and get sleeved and then live the way I feel like. Mostly, I didn't recognize until now how important it was that the liver shrink a nd how just a little bit really affects it. I'm one of those people who rationalizes all of my bad behaviour to keep it making sense (didn't work out because I have to work, didn't eat properly because I have a headache or I did lots of exercise just before). I always knew I was my own worst enemy. I am working up the nerve to call the surgery coordinator's office now. I gotta fix my mess.

Heather, we are all our own worst enemy, you are not alone!!! I'm mentally preparing for my pre op diet and surgery and I too want to thank you for posting your experience. Maybe you can join me for surgery on April 11!!! Good luck.

[samantha209 19]

I know it sucks and sounds cliche...but everything happens for a reason I suppose. My 2 week liquid diet starts Monday....i am gonna try hard as heck to stick it out...

[Susanne 32]

I am sooooo glad you posted this. I will bookmark the link and post it in every single "Can I cheat on my pre-op?"

I was way too scared to cheat for that very reason. They told me if I don't lose and even GAIN weight before surgery, they will cancel, no ifs or buts.

In general, I think it largely depends on how big you are - no offense. The bigger you are, the more important is the shrinking of the liver. There is so much mass in your abdomen at BMI of 53.9 vs. 43.9 vs. 35 etc., - think of the Biggest Loser whatever you want, but I think their X-Ray-like body fat scan image gives a good idea of what is going on inside. If you were "just" a 40, maybe they wouldn't have had to cancel it.

Another thing I think they consider is the general discipline. After surgery, there is A LOT of discipline and self-control required for a few weeks. Discipline to drink your Water, drink your Protein - at least at my surgeon's office they said that they are simply worried that if you lack discipline before surgery, you will most probably lack discipline after surgery --- just after surgery, the lack of discipline can be FATAL and cause leaks.

The other question would be, if there is no evidence that the liver shrinks - why do 98% of all surgeons make us go through the liquid or pre-op diet? Just to fcuk with our heads and torture us? I'd like to believe that's not the case from a medical professional. Maybe they all get together once a year, eat ribs and burgers and drink copious amounts of alcohol and chuckle about how they torture the fatties one last time before surgery, haha!

You'll get there. I looks like your office is trying to work with you, and they sure as hell know they got you straightened out and you'll probably not do THAT again!

Good luck and all the best - you'll get it next time and be 10x as good!

[crosswind 134]

I just got off the phone with the patient coordinator at Dr. Aceves office where I have my surgery scheduled for Monday. I was worried because I haven't really been checked out thoroughly by a doctor in a couple years. She told me not to worry -- she said, look, you're in a hospital, if there's anything wrong we'll work on it so you can have a safe surgery.

It seems like in the states the whole system really wants to make all this is as hard as possible. It's one of the reasons I decided to go to Mexico despite the risks. I had second thoughts a couple days ago and called the surgeon I was going to originally go with, and asked them if I decided to go with them and their BLIS insurance how long it would take before I actually ended up on the table. She said three months to a year.

I thought, that's three to 12 months of my life gone for some piece of paper to get somewhere else, for me to answer correctly on all the forms, for me to drive to the office and 'consult" with yet another bariatric professional, and for me to get all kinds of lectures about how I live my life.

Now I don't know for absolute sure if I've made the right decision but I do know that if I were you I would not be ashamed, I would be annoyed. It's not *you* who's got the problem, it's them, and I'll tell you what it is - your surgeon is afraid to do that surgery unless he is absolutely certain your liver is perfect. But one way to find that out, since you're actually *in the building* -- would be to order a catscan or an ultrasound to see how big it really is. It would take 45 minutes, tops. Your liver and it's rumored massiveness was sitting *right there* on the chair, in the hospital. There are actually much more scientific ways to find out if a liver is enlarged besides asking the patient if they ate a cracker that week.

You need to lose that weight and stick to your lowcarb diet to get the doctor to actually operate on you. It's his concern about his own skills that are up for review here, not your worthiness. So just do it so he feels better and you can actually get your sleeve. But don't feel bad about it -- you're actually making allowances for his insecurity. If my doctor told me he would feel better if I walked around wearing a pink hat and purchased a parrot before surgery, I'd do it.

[sunshine6855 1]

I am so sorry Heather. What a disappointment. All docs are different . My only pre-op was liquids the day before surgery, Hope you get scheduled soon.

Cathy

[Amber 4]

I completely agree that your Surgeon really did/does have your best interest in mind. He wants to make sure you have as safe a surgery as he can help you with. He sounds like a real class act, and sticks to what he believes in. Some surgeons can just be "whichever way the wind blows" and do the surgery regardless. I don't think that is someone I would want operating on me...

With that, I do believe 100% that you are going to do excellent. I am also extremely proud that you were honest. Everything does happen for a reason, so now you can nurse your cold and prepare even more for your surgery.

Hang in there, April 4th is right around the corner. With sticking to your dietary guidelines, and adding doing some painting on top (that's tough work!!!) of that you will definitely get your surgery wish.

Hugs to you...

Thank you so much for bringing your story to light, it really is going to help so many!! That's what this forum is so wonderful for.

I wish this site had a "like" as Facebook does. I agree to this entirely.

[meggiep 57]

Sorry, certainly didn't mean to come over as hysterical. This just hit on a huge personal nerve and I ranted away freely instead of being more measured in my response.

Don't feel too bad! Your original post resonated deeply with me. You said some things that make a lot of sense

I personally will follow my own doctor's two week liquid diet requirement to the letter- the liver thing does make sense to me and I want the best start I can have.

That said-

I think if it were an absolute truth that you need to diet to shrink or change your liver before this surgery, all doctors would have us do it. I suspect there was a bit of anger at the fact the instructions were not followed mixed in with the health concerns.

Most of us (and I include myself) are awed into silence by our doctors, and we forget that they actually work for us! It would not hurt to remember that , at least a little bit.

A helicopter medic (hunky cutie pie putting a warm blanket on me when I was in the ER with chest pains) told me a great joke that helps me keep things in perspective:

What's the difference between God and a doctor?

God KNOWS he is not a doctor!

[chilo1 62]

Sorry, certainly didn't mean to come over as hysterical. This just hit on a huge personal nerve and I ranted away freely instead of being more measured in my response.

Sorry Swizzly about the hysterical comment, I honestly didn't mean that, I guess it just hit a nerve with me. I've had such a good experience with my surgeon (and as I said before my Dad and my husband are surgeons) that I seem to forget that there are a**holes in all fields! (I'm not saying that her particular surgeon is) We all have are opinions on things and I know we should respect them. (please rant whenever you feel the need, it's what keeps me sane-ish!)

[chilo1 62]

OUR Opinions!

[Disney 20]

I just got off the phone with the patient coordinator at Dr. Aceves office where I have my surgery scheduled for Monday. I was worried because I haven't really been checked out thoroughly by a doctor in a couple years. She told me not to worry -- she said, look, you're in a hospital, if there's anything wrong we'll work on it so you can have a safe surgery.

It seems like in the states the whole system really wants to make all this is as hard as possible. It's one of the reasons I decided to go to Mexico despite the risks. I had second thoughts a couple days ago and called the surgeon I was going to originally go with, and asked them if I decided to go with them and their BLIS insurance how long it would take before I actually ended up on the table. She said three months to a year.

I thought, that's three to 12 months of my life gone for some piece of paper to get somewhere else, for me to answer correctly on all the forms, for me to drive to the office and 'consult" with yet another bariatric professional, and for me to get all kinds of lectures about how I live my life.

Now I don't know for absolute sure if I've made the right decision but I do know that if I were you I would not be ashamed, I would be annoyed. It's not *you* who's got the problem, it's them, and I'll tell you what it is - your surgeon is afraid to do that surgery unless he is absolutely certain your liver is perfect. But one way to find that out, since you're actually *in the building* -- would be to order a catscan or an ultrasound to see how big it really is. It would take 45 minutes, tops. Your liver and it's rumored massiveness was sitting *right there* on the chair, in the hospital. There are actually much more scientific ways to find out if a liver is enlarged besides asking the patient if they ate a cracker that week.

You need to lose that weight and stick to your lowcarb diet to get the doctor to actually operate on you. It's his concern about his own skills that are up for review here, not your worthiness. So just do it so he feels better and you can actually get your sleeve. But don't feel bad about it -- you're actually making allowances for his insecurity. If my doctor told me he would feel better if I walked around wearing a pink hat and purchased a parrot before surgery, I'd do it.

I believe you have absolutely made the right decision. More experienced doctors than Dr. Aceves are few and far between.

[swizzly 901]

Thanks -- and sorry for dissing surgeons in my ranty post. Ironically, I don't have anything against surgeons -- nor would I normally think they have a god complex, unless proven otherwise. I also really like my surgeon, she's a bit clinical and cold, but I don't need warm fuzzies from the woman who's cutting me open. The only thing she gave me shit about is my bad German. Fair enough, Frau Doktor!

In this case, what really lit my fire was the fact that, as obese people, we are/were so used to getting treated badly -- as lesser humans, as objects of contempt, etc. -- that we are easily shamed and put down. And when it's by the very people who are meant to be helping us, whose hands we put our lives into, I just see red. There is something so very unnecessarily cruel and punitive about waiting until the very last minute to do this weighing thing (after surgery prep even!) and then pulling the plug with a heaping pile of shame added on top. There can't be a doctor anywhere on the planet who really seriously believes that some carbs in the prior week or two is going to have ANY impact on a surgery's success. There is no scientific basis for that, and I do want, above all, my doctor to be quite influenced by actual science and fact.

Yes, we all want ideal outcomes and we are compliant to that end. And compliance is important, there is no question. I am happy to do apparently dumb things for the sake of compliance -- sometimes they have basis in fact and sometimes they are just hoops. But life is full of hoops we have to jump through, I'm not averse to playing the game. I draw the line -- abruptly (more and more so the older I get) -- at humiliation, lack of dignity and respect, and shaming. I don't play those games and I don't play nicely with those who do.

In this case, I'm sure it's also to do with the GD insurance companies trying to do anything they can not to pay for the treatments people need, as well as with the doctors being highly risk-averse so they don't get sued. I just thought the way the doctor himself handled it was outrageous.

And now I climb off my soapbox and get back to my regularly scheduled program of swilling down fluids...

Good luck, Infernored...here's to a cracker-free week and a quick reschedule!

[Susanne 32]

There can't be a doctor anywhere on the planet who really seriously believes that some carbs in the prior week or two is going to have ANY impact on a surgery's success. There is no scientific basis for that, and I do want, above all, my doctor to be quite influenced by actual science and fact.

I am pretty sure it's not just about some carbs. If you read the post, you can see that she actually GAINED weight before the surgery. If you are on a no carb liquid diet, I think it takes more than just a few carbs to actually gain a couple of pounds.

Infernored, I am not at all trying to crucify you or so, I am really not. I love this topic because I am often in awe how people here say "Oh, you can cheat on your pre-op, no big deal", so I think it is a good read for everyone who contemplates cheating a little bit. I am just wondering how "little bit" your cheating was. I mean, you don't gain from a cracker or two, right? Did you really just have a little bit of carbs?

A little bit of cheating is very human, but as said above, a little bit doesn't make you gain pounds on a liquid diet.

I do agree that it is really bizarre that they let you go through all this before. Weighing me was the first thing they did and I would hope that they would comment on a posible gain immediately and not let me go through the blood drawing, the thinner etc. before they kick me out.

I do prefer a surgeon who would kick me out though, instead of one who'd just wing it thinking "We are in a hospital, we'll figure it out as we go along". I believe a lot of people die from complications during surgery where it's just not possible to "figure it out" as you go along since I am in a medical facility. I want my surgeon to be 100% sure for an optional procedure.

As for the cat scan, whose supposed to pay for that? I am sure a scan probably costs $1000 or so - I am not sure OP would have been willing to shell out an additional $1000 for a scan to check the liver, but I may be wrong. CT scans also deliver a respectable amount of radiation -- and all that because someone couldn't keep their hands out of the cookie jar?