Sometimes I still feel like a failure!!!

[Used2b575lbs 29]

I don't know why but if I slip up and have something that I know I am not supposed to have I get this feeling like I have failed like I am a failure.

It's really illogical to think that I will spend the rest of my life eating chicken, eggs, and other lean Proteins without ever having some of those bad foods I know. Still every time I have something bad I feel like I am going to gain back all the weight and fail again.

Yesterday I just had to have a boston cream donut and I did but I spent the rest of the day and night beating myself up about it.

I am 8 months out tomorrow and I feel like I shouldn't be eating any crap like that, but sometimes my head still gets in the way.

Why can't I just be happy and Celebrate my success why must I harp on a little failure like having a donut. One donut won't put back on all the weight I lost before surgery and since and most of the time I eat what I am supposed to per my doctor and nutritionist.

Does anyone else ever feel like this?

[avilda 2]

Remember this isn't about one meal or one slip up, it is about a lifestyle change. With that said... one doughnut one day won't hurt you... what will hurt you is a slip back in to old habits.

A wise man who I met along this journey told me, "It isn't what you did, it is what you did after you did what you did."

Did you eat crap the whole day?

Are you going to eat crap today?

Probably not. Keep up the good work and don't let one slip get you off track!!

[Tiffykins 673]

For me, and me alone, I think starting to realize there are NO BAD FOODS will help with this mindset. Learning that there are "best, better, not so great" choices with all foods and drinks really helped me live the life of moderation I truly wanted. food is either nutrient dense, or nutrient lacking.

For me, deprivation leads to binging. Therefore, I have to make the conscious choice on what I put in my mouth. If I want a donut, I'm going to have a donut. It's done and over with, I can't take it back, I can't not have it process in my body, and I refuse to think that a donut on occasion is going to make me gain back 140lbs.

It does take time for the brain to catch up with the body, but it does happen. At least it has for me.

Remember, you are human, and only you can decide what is best for you. Learning to stop beating yourself up for having a donut will be the first step.

[clk 3,519]

Tiffy is 100% right on this.

First of all, you're almost to goal - you've had tremendous success. You are obviously not a failure at weight loss.

Secondly, my personal thoughts are more in line with becoming a REAL, NORMAL person. "Normal" people do not live low carb lives forevermore. They eat lots of healthy foods and watch their portions but guess what? They eat what they want, in moderation!

I personally feel that it is not only unhealthy, but an unattainable goal to limit yourself to an ounce of chicken, a hardboiled egg and a carrot stick for every meal for the rest of your life. Guess what? You're human...you're going to get sick of that after a while and then the real trouble will begin - binges because you feel completely unsatisfied and limited by your food choices.

Don't start eating a donut a day, now. But for crying out loud, cut yourself some slack! You need to start slowly branching out and allowing yourself the room to be a normal person. Because once you hit goal, you're going to need to incorporate more carbs and more calories to maintain...and that's not easy to do on slices of chicken and carrot sticks!

It takes a long time to break old habits. So don't fall into the habit of eating nothing but junk. And don't be surprised that it takes you a long time to stop feeling guilty about what you eat, or to stop worrying that all of a sudden you'll regain everything. You do need to be careful, but if you don't give yourself a little flexibility here, you're going to struggle more in the long run.

Just my opinion, of course. Keep up the great work. We all deal with these issues. Some people choose to swear that they will never, ever let those "bad" foods cross their lips again, and that's their personal choice. I had to flex a bit because I'm a slow loser anyway and seeing no results day after day while eating "perfectly" was driving me insane.

Be well,

~Cheri

[Used2b575lbs 29]

I guess I shouldn't expect my head to catch up in less then 2 years to the 20 years of overeating I had before it.

I also know it's not practical to think one can stick to low carbs forever.

I suppose i'm just having problems finding the balance between eating the good and the bad.

My body is definitely carb sensitive and if I have anything with sugar or that similates sugar it sets off the fireworks in my head. Took me a while to realize this but i'm kind of addicted to it.

I can break that addiction for a time but if I have something sweet my body goes back into crave mode and it takes 3 days of eating low carbs to break that chain again.

It's like all or nothing kind of like the years of yo-yo dieting I did, struggling with breaking the all or nothing philosphy and working in the good and bad at the same time while making sure the bad is only moderate.

[MovinForward 2]

For me, and me alone, I think starting to realize there are NO BAD FOODS will help with this mindset. Learning that there are "best, better, not so great" choices with all foods and drinks really helped me live the life of moderation I truly wanted. food is either nutrient dense, or nutrient lacking.

For me, deprivation leads to binging. Therefore, I have to make the conscious choice on what I put in my mouth. If I want a donut, I'm going to have a donut. It's done and over with, I can't take it back, I can't not have it process in my body, and I refuse to think that a donut on occasion is going to make me gain back 140lbs.

It does take time for the brain to catch up with the body, but it does happen. At least it has for me.

Remember, you are human, and only you can decide what is best for you. Learning to stop beating yourself up for having a donut will be the first step.

Totally Agree !!!

[chilo1 62]

I don't know why but if I slip up and have something that I know I am not supposed to have I get this feeling like I have failed like I am a failure.

It's really illogical to think that I will spend the rest of my life eating chicken, eggs, and other lean Proteins without ever having some of those bad foods I know. Still every time I have something bad I feel like I am going to gain back all the weight and fail again.

Yesterday I just had to have a boston cream donut and I did but I spent the rest of the day and night beating myself up about it.

I am 8 months out tomorrow and I feel like I shouldn't be eating any crap like that, but sometimes my head still gets in the way.

Why can't I just be happy and Celebrate my success why must I harp on a little failure like having a donut. One donut won't put back on all the weight I lost before surgery and since and most of the time I eat what I am supposed to per my doctor and nutritionist.

Does anyone else ever feel like this?

You know I feel exactly the same. I think because I haven't reached goal and I indulge in some "treats" once in a while I feel like a failure. I do agree with what Tiff said though, I thing all these prohibited bad foods nonesense made me fat in the first place, I would not let myself eat anything for weeks and then binge on them. Your weight loss is amazing, so you've already been a success.

[anninva 12]

woman, you have lost a tremendous amount of weight and are to be congratulated. and it doesn't surprise me that at 8 mos out this is particularly hard to resist -- the honeymoon period, or so i'm told is over and the hard stuff starts. i'm still only almost 3 mos out and i can feel the cravings coming back already. sigh. but every time i really screw up, my friend the nurse practitioner who runs my surgery program says "hey, i'm not telling you to never go to McDonald's again. Skinny people do it. it's about portion control." so, that makes me feel better about the 300 cal jr cheeseburger i had from wendy's last weekend.

don't know if any of this helps. obviously i haven't gotten as far as you have, so no comparison, but . . . i think you're doing great against a foe we all battle or else we wouldn't be here!!!

[NJMOMof2 17]

Sweetie....love yourself and be proud of all you've accomplished! YOU LOST MORE THAN YOU CURRENTLY WEIGH!!! That is absolutely amazing. You are a WINNER!!!!!!!