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I'm Ready To Quit.



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I am so close to giving up. I feel so sick right now and it's only been 2 days on Opticrap. The aspertame is giving me awful headaches and nausea. I feel like I can't function.

I dread every time Kathy at Dr. Cobourn's office calls because she has such a nasty phone manner that I always leave the conversation feeling like a stupid child.

I emailed her today to ask for her help with this Optifast issue and she phoned me back to tell me she received my payment and can not take a personal cheque. "WE HAVE BEEN EXTREMELY CLEAR ON THIS"

Yes, I'm sure she has told me, probably twice...but I screwed up, and after reading every single email from her office and every form in my package it didn't mention how I could pay or how I couldn't, so I sent a cheque. (Very stupid Mistake, i know) I would have called to check with them first...but I HATE talking to her.

She was so incredibly nasty.

I've been thinking of forfeiting my deposit and going elsewhere for awhile anyway.

...mind you now it's a matter of $1500 plane tickets and $450 in hotel bills.

I was stupid to think I could handle this on my own. I'm confused and frustrated and I can't handled these headaches anymore.

I have no idea how I'd get the money there in time now...and I feel so negative about them that I'm not sure I feel comfortable going there.

I messed up and now I'm stuck and I don't know what to do anymore.

I'm so sorry for the pity party. I really am. I should just stop crying and try to figure something out...and take some Tylenol.:think

Sunshine

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Aww, Sunshine. I'm not in Canada and have no opinion about your doc's office matters...but I just wanted to send a ((((hug))) your way. Hang in there. I'm sorry you feel so yucky. Shame on the "yucky Kathy" for talking to you that way. :eek:

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Oh Sunshine, don’t despair! We will always go through life with people standing in our way; it’s just a matter of walking around them to get to where you want to be instead of letting other stand in our way.

The easiest solution is this; today, go to your bank and cancel your other cheque and get a bank draft, take it to the local mail boxes inc and send it one or two day courier. The cost to you is about 6.5 for the draft and 9. for the postage and 30 minutes of your time.

Next, call and ask to speak to your Doctor in person. Tell him you don’t like the “service” and know they are better than this…….and yes, they are! Request that your support person be changes (Rose is very nice at the office). Get the issue resolved with the Optifast and see if there is a replacement formula……or just a strict diet.

Remember that you are doing this for you and not Kathy and the bigger the obstacles, the greater the reward. I’m one week post-op and know what you mean about the optifast but I look at it as though in the long run, it’s a very short period of time I will at some point…… forget. I’m down 20 lbs on that opti-crap diet in the last three weeks and would battle it out with any rude, abrasive smart ass, self absorbed assistant any day to be at the point I am today.

Chin up, dukes up……and come out fighting, just don’t give up!

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Sunshine, the only thing I can offer to help you feel better is to let you know about he headache. It gets better! It really does. I had a nasty perma-migraine for the first 2 or 3 days while I broke my addiction to carbs.

After the headache goes, so does the hunger. Then there is the joint pain, it is so much easier than the headache though!

You should definitely get a new contact person.

The pain you are going through right now will be worth it when you are succeeding!

Take care and don't give up.

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Hey CanadaSunshine!!

Don't despair!

First of all, the headaches are likely from carb withdrawal (not the Optifast itself) and the withrdrawal symptoms will go away soon (promise!). Its also gonna make you feel cranky; that will also go away.

Now, IF it is the actual Optifast causing the headaches (ie. aspartame) then talk to your doc...you can do another diet instead of that one (ie. cottage cheese/yougurt).

Second of all..you (or your insurance co....either way; it doesn't matter) are paying a LOT of $$ for this and you are entitled to better service. MOST DEFINITELY if you are not happy with the service you are receiving you should tell them and give them the opportunity to "fix it". You are not a child and shouldn't be treated like one. So, say something to them about it...express that you are not satisifed.

That being said: if you are completely unhappy with the people you are dealing with and that makes you feel uncomfortable; consider switching (ie. TLBC is also in Toronto) and taking your business elsewhere You also have that perogative. You have to ask yourself how important your comfort level is to you. I know you have $$ and time invested but if it isn't meeting your expectations (that you entitled to!!) then look elsewhere.

Finally...chin up! It will get better. Don't quit....keep at it and you will one day (I know, hard to imagine now) look back at this and smile.

:eek: :phanvan

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Ok well NO one has the right to talk to another person in a way that belittles them. Do people do it? Yes. Should we take it? No. Next time she talks to you like that, gather up your calmest, but firm voice and tell her that you don't appreciate the way she is talking to you, and that you are both adults and you expect her to talk to you like one, and remind her who is the paying customer. :eek: I still can't believe people in doctors offices talk to others that way. We in no way have to put up with that kind of attitude.

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Hi Sunshine. First of all "Big Hugs". I am so sorry that you are going through this. I don't even remember a Kathy at Dr. Cobourn's office. But for sure you should ask to speak with someone else and ask for that person from now on. They will not cancel your surgery right away, they will wait I'm sure until you can get the money to them, but why don't they just cash the cheque? Then they would have it, I don't get it? Anyway on day 2 and 3 I had severe headaches, I honestly took as much advil I could and stayed in bed for 2 days. It will go away!!!! If not ask if you can do something else, but don't even talk to this Kathy, ask for Marie. Above all "It will all be worth it" before you know it, you will be post op and all will be forgotten! Honest, hang in there, and keep us informed, it helps to talk it out, and vent.:eek:

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Sunshine.....ditto on everything that Yoda has written. I will add one thing though.

If you decide to stay with your current Dr, then you need to deal with the situation with Kathy. Write her an email, tell her exactly how you feel....get right to the point, mention a few specific incidents. Tell her that you would like to have another person assigned to you.....$16,000 dollars later, I think you are more than entitled to this.

cc this email to anyone else you know in the office ie the Dr. or other staff person so that it won't get denied or ignored.

Either one of two things will happen.....you will get someone else assigned to you or Kathy will change her divatude!

Carol

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I am a Canadian living in Australia. I can relate to what you are experiencing. The medical profession live in another dimension to us, I have had to accept and live with that. This helps.

My band was done here in Melbourne. The Optifast lead up was a real chalenge. I had a real battle getting through it. But faced with the everyday inconvienience of being fat and having low self esteem overcame that. I was out of hope and having the band done was all I had left. There was no future for me as a fat person. I was sick of it. I tried everything and was still suffering from my overweight.

Get through it, think about a real, ongoing new future. An experience like never before. Feel like Alice before she went through the looking glass.

Yoh have made a good decsion. Go through with it. Don't go back, you know what is behind you.

Buick Eight

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Also have to say, if you quit you know how you are going to feel, defeated. You have been there before.

If you battle ahead it will all be new territory. Feelings you have never had before.

Battle on!

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(((HUGS))) X2 First, I want you to tell you that we are here for you. I agree with everything everyone before me said. You should not let her talk to you that way. I am in nursing school and the day I don't ENJOY my job, and love my patients, and empathize with them, is the day I quit. I am sure of this. If she is treating you this way, she has done it with someone else. You will not be the first to complain on her. If you are sure you can do it over the phone, talk in email. I know when I am fuming mad, if I get on the phone I cry, but at times like that, its either cry or tear someone a new a&%.

This will so be worth everything you have gone through in the end. I hope you feel better...

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Wow you guys are awsome. Please be around when I am having my lapses.

Sunshine, hang in there, it will be all worth it in the end.

Nothing to add but hugs and understanding............

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I know that these people are "helping us out" medically. But we are helping them too. Medical personnel are nothing if they don't have patients to pay their way. You paid your money. They are working for YOU. Don't put up with that. You should definately have your patient coordinator changed. That is my opinion anyways. Hope things get better for you.

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I'm so sorry you're having a rough time, you definitely need to do something about the way things are being handled at your surgeon's office. Like you need more stress! Geez. If it helps, I'm in hell right now on my post op liquid diet as well, so at least you know there's someone else out there feeling the same way!! HANG IN THERE, YOU CAN DO IT!

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My Goodness!! You guys are the most wonderful friends I've never met...

My pity party was pathetic and whiney, but you have held me up when I fell on my face. Thank you so much.

Thank you "The best me" (Kathy),Cloe,Jen, and Paulax For the hugs! And every single one of you for some excellent advice.

Betty Boop, I don't think I stopped crying until you refered to her as a "rude,abrasive smart ass, self absorbed assistant ". I guess that's low self-esteem talking when you automatically internalize everybody else's lousy behaviour...shame on me for giving up so easy.

And Buick Eight...you could not have been more right...if I give up I will be "defeated" again, and this isn't going to ever be easy...I just need to power through. So true.

Jen, I also cry when fuming mad so I don't know if I would be capable of complaining about her. I am seriously terrified of confrontation.:rant: I've never torn anyone a new a#%hole but I fantasize about it some times lol. Perhaps after my band...I will take my Calcium supplements as directed and grow myself a spine?

Well, I had too much scrambling to do today to take the Optifast so I have tried to stay full on Water and I had a whey Protein shake. it's sweetened with sucralose, which I have an easier time with. (It's way more disgusting, but not painful *whew!*) Now the headaches are within reason. I can handle this amount of pain.

I will go back to Optifast tomorrow and hopefully what was said about carb withdrawal is true a little for me too. I've been on several fasts, though, and have never been that sick. Also, I got sick within 10 minutes of having the first shake...before my body was even aware it was carbless I'm sure.:eek:

At any rate, I'm going to keep trying to take them. I just thought that it made no sense to take Tylenol with every shake...but if that's what gets me through I'll try.

I sent that deperate email to kathy about how sick and miserable I was feeling on Thursday. I never did get a response.:fish: I guess i just have to figure this one out on my own. jerks!

I am very screwed when it comes to getting the money to them. I bank with Presidents Choice Financial and they have no tellers. I requested a bank draft and was told it would be sent to my home in 7 to 10 business days.:omg:

So I went to my other bank, that I rarely use. (TD) they can have it drawn up on the same day...but here's the rub...effin presidents choice wll only let me take out $1000 per day.*insert sobbing, and blubbering here* so I can't take the money to TD to get a bank draft.

Next I tried postal Money orders...tried to get my credit card limit upped...and wracked my brain for other ideas. It does NOT help that I have no information in my documentation as to what options I DO have as far as payment. Effin Effers!!:tsk:

Well eventually, when nothing I came up with worked...I did what any 30 year old mother of one would do...lol...I called my mom.

She and I are going to try to fandangle something where she transfers funds to my TD account and I buy the bank draft and courier it. I just HOPE, hope, hope there isn't some reason that I can't do THAT.

Kathy said I have until Tuesday at the latest or I am cancelled. I know it won't get there Tuesday no matter how I send it, but I will send it anyway. (I am in Alberta, it has to get to Ontario)

I will try to exaust all my options...and if it doesn't work out I am going to go to another Dr. At least I will have that stupid bank draft ready in my sweaty little hand and my liver will be good to go. Until then I WILL FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT. Thank you ever so much for the encouragement...the instruction...the kick in the pants.

I apologize again for dumping negativity in this happy place...

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