Introduction and thank you's

irishprincess966 · February 18, 2011

So here I am, 30 years old, single mom, grad student, full time employee, new home owner, and morbidly obese. I have been overweight since first grade. I was picked on, teased, ridiculed and made to feel uncomfortable in my own skin since I was 6. When I graduated high school I was around 180-190. Somehow I managed to gain almost 80 pounds in 2 years while dating my ex. The phrase “blinded by love” comes to mind because neither one of us realized what was happening to my body while he was romancing me with dinners out, chocolates, Breakfast in bed and other delicious treats. I would also like to mention that he only gained 6 pounds, and soaking wet never crossed the 160 mark. So then at 20 years old, I get pregnant. I step on the scale at the OBGYN and it says I am 267 pounds! I don’t know what was more of a shock, finding out my new weight or that I was growing a tiny human being inside of me.

The pregnancy was good. No diabetes, some hypertension at the end, I actually lost weight and delivered at 263 lbs. I had a beautiful 8 lb, 13 oz baby girl to hold in my arms. I was in my pre-pregnancy clothes before I left the hospital. I joke that she was the best diet I was ever on. Lol. When I went back for my 6 month check up at the OBGYN he tells me I have to do something about my weight. He gives me the name of Dr. Bertha in Florham Park, NJ and tells me to look into the gastric bypass. I was shocked. I had no idea my weight was that bad. At 21 I was not ready to completely rearrange my digestive track without trying something first.

So I did the usual… Weight Watchers, Slim Fast, South Beach, exercise 3-5 times a week. Nothing. I have gained and lost a thousand pounds. Last year I started seeing a Metabolic Specialist who put me on Phentermine. Still nothing. So here I am, same approximate weight that I was when I had my daughter nearly 9 years later and it is time for me to take the big step towards surgery. I fraught with a million questions and concerns and luckily I found this group to help me with them.

I had my consultation with Dr Bertha a few weeks ago. He is still relatively new to the Sleeve but has done so many of the RNY procedures that I am not too concerned with him being new to this particular surgery. I would be about his 20^th sleeve to date. I am scheduled for 2 months for today since I wanted to do it when my daughter would be on spring break. I wanted to make sure I wouldn’t have to drive her anywhere for at least a week. I am also only telling a small handful of my closest friends that I am having the procedure since I don’t want the ridicule that I know will come from it, especially from my mother. Hopefully I can keep it all nice and quiet so that no one finds out if I don’t want them to. I have 2 friends who are going to help me out since they have gone through other types of Weight Loss Surgery and know what to expect better than I do.

Now my questions:

· Has anyone on this forum had Dr Bertha do their procedure? What were your experiences with him?

· How long I am going to be out of commission. I am only planning on taking about a week off since I don’t want to tell my boss about the surgery. Is this going to be enough time?

· I am also in a wedding in July, just over 2 months after my surgery. I am concerned with loosing either too much or not enough weight to fit into my bridesmaid dress, which I ordered 1 size smaller so that I hopefully won’t need to make too many alterations to it. Opinions?

· Since my surgery is a week before Easter, am I going to be able to make it to church? I am sure I am going to have to come up with a reason why I can’t make it to dinner with the family, but that I can handle.

· What other complications are possible besides for the leakage or problems with the incisions?

· What happens if this doesn’t work and I don’t lose any weight at all? Or I gain it all back? Not having extensive studies on this type of procedure makes me nervous.

· What will my skin and breasts look like after this is all said and done? Should I start saving for an augmentation now? lol

I have a million more but will leave it at that for now. This forum has been so helpful to me by answering so many questions and concerns. I read your stories everyday and though some of them are scary, so many people are happy about their experiences and glad they went through the procedure. I am excited to finally be taking a hold of my weight, which has controlled me in a million different ways for almost 25 years. I am looking forward to going shopping in regular stores, not getting fat comments made at me by people who don’t think I can hear them, and especially for getting to live a longer and healthier life for my daughter and myself. I know that this is the right surgery for me. This is exactly what I have been looking for since 2002 and I know that this is the right time for me to do it. I am just so scared to be doing it alone.

Thank you all so much for reading my very lengthy introduction/rant and for posting all of your stories and questions. You have made me feel like a member of this community without even knowing it. God Bless.

myrori · February 18, 2011

Early on before my surgery I was all about keeping it quiet too. Then as it got closer I felt like it was to stressful, I felt like I was lying. I had my surgery 2 days before Thanksgiving and with Christmas around the corner I just felt I had to be up front with my family as they would definitely notice my absence on Thanksgiving and different eating on Christmas.

It turned out to the be the best thing telling them,,, I got so much support and praise. I did run into a couple nay sayers at work,,, I think they were just threatened by my impending weight loss, like somehow they were ok if someone weighed more than them they did not have to worry about their weight. For the most part I get nothing but compliments at work.

I went to an auction on my third day out of the hospital, did I feel normal or great at that point? NO< but I was able. I did take a month off work to avoid the Holiday food gluteny that happens there AND to get used to my new eating and drinking habits. Physically I could have gone back at 2 weeks, but I have a very mentally demanding job and I wanted to transition slowly.

· Has anyone on this forum had Dr Bertha do their procedure? What were your experiences with him?

· How long I am going to be out of commission. I am only planning on taking about a week off since I don’t want to tell my boss about the surgery. Is this going to be enough time?

· I am also in a wedding in July, just over 2 months after my surgery. I am concerned with loosing either too much or not enough weight to fit into my bridesmaid dress, which I ordered 1 size smaller so that I hopefully won’t need to make too many alterations to it. Opinions?

~No

· Since my surgery is a week before Easter, am I going to be able to make it to church? I am sure I am going to have to come up with a reason why I can’t make it to dinner with the family, but that I can handle.

~ yes to Church, dinner with family should be about being with family and bringing your own diet Jello to eat

· What other complications are possible besides for the leakage or problems with the incisions?

There a thousands of complications possible from ANY surgery, but the doctors are aware and watch for them. Your incisions will be less than an inch in length and most likely shut with steri strips. Itching is the most common complaint.

· What happens if this doesn’t work and I don’t lose any weight at all? Or I gain it all back? Not having extensive studies on this type of procedure makes me nervous.

YOU WILL LOSE WEIGHT, trust me. The only way to gain it back is to eat things like Mcdonalds milk shakes and carbs. It is really hard to eat more than like an ounce of anything at the begining.

· What will my skin and breasts look like after this is all said and done? Should I start saving for an augmentation now? lol

I am still in the losing process, I so far my skin is good except in the stomach and under arms area,,,, sad to report the breasts were the first thing to go with the weight loss, so when I get my Tummy Tuck I will get the girls put back up north too

irishprincess966 · February 22, 2011

Thank you so much for your reply. I really appreciate it. I hinted about the surgery to my mother this weekend and she seemed very negative about it so I think I will keep it from her, at least until after it is over and recovery is moving along.

DonnaG · February 22, 2011

Thank you so much for your reply. I really appreciate it. I hinted about the surgery to my mother this weekend and she seemed very negative about it so I think I will keep it from her, at least until after it is over and recovery is moving along.

I am 5 days post op, my surgery was on Thursday. Had you asked was it worth in on Friday I probably would have told you no because I had such a bad reaction to the anethesia (normal for me). Today, it is the best thing I've done for myself in a very long time.

My family knows I had surgery and only 2 people at work. I have not decided how or when to tell the rest of them. This was something I did to save the rest of my life. I am 52 and have high blood pressure and cholesterol and if I didn't do something to help myself lose weight I was not going to be around long enough to ever see grandchildren.

If you already have your bridesmaids dress, you might want to make sure that you try it on at least a week before the wedding just in case. I've lost 9 lbs since my surgery and it's only been 5 days. Your fastest weightloss will be in the beginning.

Good luck on your journey, your daughter will thank you some day for sticking around for her.

bilka · February 22, 2011

Hello!

I had surgery exactly 2 weeks ago. Last weekend I got the stitches out and since that moment everything is great. Yesterday the busses were striking (we always strike in Italy) so I walked home and I was fine. No pain no more feeling too tired to walk. In just 2 weeks.

I am 30 too, but I have no kids and no full time job. Anyway, I was able to go back to my silly job already 8 days after surgery. I can go shopping alone (last weekend I told my hubby I still needed his help, but that wasn't exactly true, I just wanted to spend some extra time with him), I did play the whole afternoon with my 5 year old niece last Saturday.

My mother has told her friends that I am on a serious diet, so that if they see me smaller they'll know "why".

My friends know that I had hiatal hernia removed and can't eat much nor drink alcohol for 3 months (they were like "Not even wine??? Is wine alcohol, really?". Very Italian). I am going to be a bridesmaid too in a month and I told the bride the same: I had the hernia removed and can't eat nor drink much, so she won't annoy me if I don't get drunk or if I don't eat like a pig. I will dance though!

You'll definitely be one size less in two months. As DonnaG says, try the dress one a week before the wedding and see if there are any small arrangements you can do with a couple of stitches (they all look at the bride at wedding, so I wouldn't worry too much...)

And! I have said goodbye to my boobs. They are already shrinking, while everything else still looks the same. Thank goodness there are Wonder Bras etc, so, again, I wouldn't be too worried!

Now this is my experience...