What to say at work?

[brazcan 37]

I will be back to work next week and I really did not want to get into details of my surgery. I know people will ask and I do not feel comfortable just dismissing them but I do not want people saying things like " removed part of the stomach" (it still shocks me). Any sugestions on how to briefly answer without being rude and without extending the conversation? Any suggestions will be appreciated.

[groovearmada 14]

Hello there!

You sound as if everything is going great, i am planning on surgery with with Dr Kelly in April, i just still need to finalise flights and sort nerves out! Did you tell people at work that you had a holiday?

Im hoping that I wont need to tell anyone anything, i went on a holiday, came back, realised that i looked awful in the holiday pictures so drastically changed my diet.

Its no one elses business but mine. I can keep to myself in work though, it might be difficult for other people to do that.

x

Groove

[Stacy160 201]

Tell the truth... just omit the crucial element! You're eating low-carb, getting lots of Protein, drinking lots of Water, watching your calories, and exercising. Getting through the first couple of weeks with the liquids and stuff will be trickiest, but you can tell them (if anyone notices) you're doing a detox thing or something (which basically you are--they don't need to know it's surgically induced! LOL). After that, don't try to hide that you're eating small and healthy or it'll look suspicious...and make sure you drop your exercise habits into the conversation on a regular basis.

It can be done! I'm lucky, my work crew is like a second family to me and I told them all everything beforehand, in detail, and have received nothing but support all this time (and they even remember not to mention the surgery itself in front of patients!).

[Susanne 32]

It'll take a while before people are noticing or at least until they'll comment - that's my experience. People are often hesitating to comment on a fat woman's weight loss because they don't want to insult you. By then, people may have also noticed that you eat better and smaller portions, and maybe that you exercise so they may attribute it to that.

Now, the other thing is a discussion that is coming back all the time - tell or not. Some people say it's none of their business and while that is true, it still doesn't help when someone asks -- unless you have no problem to flat out lie. Some people are offended if people ask but I don't think this is always mean spirited or intruding. I personally would tell. I am not ashamed of my surgery - I have been struggling with losing weight for many years, I have exhausted all other options and now chose to do this. It was my choice, but it doesn't mean it has to be a secret.

I would tell if a person asks, and if I feel their attitude is negative, I would probably just say that this was a medical decision I did for myself after exhausting all other options, and that I would prefer not to discuss it any further. On the other hand, if people are supportive, it is a great boost and it feels great to be able to tell about your success.

I feel it is a little bit like "coming out of the closet" for a gay man/woman. Yeah, it is no one's business - their sexual orientation isn't and my medical procedure isn't, but if we all treat it like a shameful thing, we can't blame other people for also treating it like it is something embarrassing. Just like being gay, this surgery was not a choice for me, but it was a medical necessity for a healthy, happy life after everything else failed.

And for the worst case scenario - haters, tell them to go fcuk themselves and don't think about it anymore - but I'd still tell them.

[KabinKitty 11]

I posted this same question before I had surgery. I have not returned to work, but I needed to give some paperwork to my boss. So, when I went in and encountered some of my coworkers they asked me where I had been. I told them "I'm just taking care of some health issues". They didn't pry any further, except to ask if I was okay and when I would be coming back.

My boss and one trusted coworker are the only ones who know I had any surgery. My boss doesn't know the details, only the one trusted coworker. She's not telling, in fact I think she waiting so see how I do. I think she may be considering the same surgery. One asked me if I had lost some weight and I told her, yeah about 6 pounds. I had lost 21 on my own before surgery and had shared with her I had cut out all gluten.

I am never telling any of them what kind of surgery I had. If one of my dear friends sees my weight loss and I believe they are truly considering gastric bypass, I will share the details with them.

[Douceur72 3]

When people ask how you are losing, just say you got some help from your doctor. Hopefully that would be enough to satisfy their curiosity. If they want more details (as I remember sooo many times when I've lost weight before - i.e. "omg- tell me your secrets!") you can say, "ya know, weight loss is very different for everyone...if you want to lose weight I'd suggest going to your doctor to discuss the best method for you."

I will be back to work next week and I really did not want to get into details of my surgery. I know people will ask and I do not feel comfortable just dismissing them but I do not want people saying things like " removed part of the stomach" (it still shocks me). Any sugestions on how to briefly answer without being rude and without extending the conversation? Any suggestions will be appreciated.

[dlflightgirl 2]

Today was my first day back at work after surgery. Day 9 for me and I lost 24 ibs. I haven't hide it at all and when people ask why I tell them the truth. I was starting to become diabetic and my health was getting much worse a lot quicker. I decided to pay out of pocket rather than weight for my life to take a turn for the worse and then have insurance cover it. This was simply the best choice for me and I don't regret it yet.

[curtsj01 1]

I told my music minister at church about it prior to and no one else. Well, when I was out for surgery and recovery, he told the choir (my extended family) and so of course, more people than I necessarily care to, knew about my decision. Since I knew he told some people, I decided to write out a Note on Facebook about it. So who ever choose to read it would understand my reasons for coming to this choice, would know what the procedure was about, what changes I was making and how they could or could not help. Prior to this note, I was getting a lot of persistent unsolicited advice from the few people I did tell that did not coincide with the doctor's orders.

Afterwards, more people understood and were on the same page as me. I didn't want to tell anyone because of the stigmata of the fat girl getting WLS, however, now when people ask me about it, I answer questions. I know that if I don't answer their questions, they will come to their own conclusions which may not always be good. I explain how I am eating and adjusting and how things are going. Maybe now that they know, the potlucks will be more healthier. LOL.... And I know that there is one lady in the choir who is considering the surgery, so if I can be motivation for someone else to get their life in order, then I should.

At this point, anyone who has a problem can walk on. No one is going to put my stomach back in, so anything negative they have to say now is useless,