Just For Today - I surrender

[SinDLou 4]

I need help letting go, food has been my escape and friend for my entire life. Now, I am waiting on insurance approval and date for my sleeve procedure and I'm scarde. Fear, I know, is my will trying to predict outcome, control my situation.

I am 14 years clean and sober (on March 15), food has taken the place of my drugs and alcohol addiction. Actually, food has probably always been my drug of choice.

My weight is about 260, and worse than that I feel awful.

My husband is almost 300 lbs, and also going through the process of having a sleeve surgery. We are both active in AA and NA, but have not let go of food addiction.

What will my life be like when I can't use food to isolate, escape? Will I replace it with yet just another addiction? God help me to finally surrender.

[Billy363627 15]

There are soo many healthy addictions out there. Volunteer at church or homeless shelter. Getting new hobbies like golfing ,flying model airplanes, putting puzzles together..Shopping.. . I hope that helps you out. There are soo many bad habits you could form to replace the food your not getting, but I am trying to get involved with something before surgery so I will have a outlet (a plan before it becomes an issue)...Good luck and not all habits are bad..

[SinDLou 4]

After reading your reply, I immediately took a breath and felt somewhat relaxed. I have to constantly be reminded to take it easy, stay in the present, and stop STRESSING. I really appreciate that you took the time to send encouragement. Thank you very much.

[Billy363627 15]

If I can help on person everyday I feel like I have done my part on this web site. I am new and I have just been sleeved about 10 days ago so we are all learning from one another and I hope everything turns good for you and I really do wish you good luck..

[SinDLou 4]

I hope you are doing well, would love an update. My sleeve date is March 3. I just found out yesterday. Last minute advice?

[Roseib 13]

It is scary. Having a behavioral plan as suggested above is key I think. That is letting go of the addiction leaves a spaciousness in our lives and as you point out we don't need to fill it with another addiction. Plan how you will live with the spaciousness before the surgery. Btw I highly recommend the book Addiction and Grace by Gerald May. It was published probably 20 years ago but even if its out of print you csn probably find it online at Amazon or ABE for cheap. IMO well worth it. I'm 8 months out. Doing fine. Lost 115 pounds (19 preop)

[SinDLou 4]

Thanks for the support, actually I was able to purchase the book on my IPAD, so will read it this weekend. I wish you well, and thanks again for helping others.

My food addition has kicked into high gear - Tuesday I found out my surgery date is March 3. Wow, I have a zillion feelings - all surfacing at once and I'm turning to my drug of choice.

So, today is a new day and with my new book I will surrender and take comfort in something better than food - support from others.

Have a blessed day.

[MICHELLE LEE 19]

I too used to look to food for comfort. Sometimes still do, but end up feeling horrid. Lately, I have just been sending up a little prayer asking for peace of mind, and a calm heart. Then I find one room in the house and clean it top to bottom. For me, it helps. You just have to find your own soothing activity, preferably away from the kitchen ....

[kymmi12 0]

i am going through the same addiction .. i am a mother of 2 and wife .. so i am always cooking and feeding my family ..its so dam hard to say No to my kids when they want junk food. i have to say no .. i have began to walk when i just want junk food.. and i Pray.. watch oout for slider foods.. I had surgery on my foot and i gained 10lbs from sittng around and NOT being able to exercise.. I feel awful .. I can't believe I gained weight .. Now I want to eat because of depression..lol its a vicious cycle and I want OUT... I want to loose another 75 lbs... Today I am 250.......(again) lol i had got down to 239....... I am Pissed at myself ..