kinda gotta lie!?!?!?

txaggiemom · January 14, 2011

I told my husband, kids and boss before the surgery. I didn't tell my parents because they are hypochondiacs (literally) and I would have to deal with them calling me every day thinking I was going to die. I thought I would tell them afterwards when they saw how little I ate or how much weight I lost, but every time I saw them, they didn't really notice so I just never told them. I can't tell my sisters because they will tell my parents. I told my brother and he begged me not to tell my parents because he lives close to them and he would have to hear every day how they were worried I was going to die. Most everyone else I know now knows.

I figure at some point if the opportunnity pressents itself, I will probably tell them, but I really don't feel bad at all for keeping the secret. It was for me only and has made my life so much better. The only person I would feel bad about not telling is someone who could benefit from the sleeve and I didn't share how well it works.

AutumnLily · January 14, 2011

hahaha you sound like me. . . i didn't tell my family at all either, i called my mom and non chalantly told her that i was going on vacation for about 2 weeks and that i would call as soon as i could. . she understood. . .so after i got home from the hospital on day 4 after 1 1/2 weeks i called her and told her all about my "vacation" and what a great time we had. . . then she came to visit me on Thanksgiving and by this time i had lost way over 100 lbs that is when i told her. . . hell what could she say right???? it worked great for me as well. . . families can be such a pain in the gluteous maximus. . . .

After 100 Lbs lost would it not be called a gluteous minimus? :-)

dishdiva · January 14, 2011

Greetings from a white liar! I told very very people when I had band surgery -- THEN, I didn't tell them when it slipped. THEN, I didn't have to tell them when I had it removed... because the haters would have said, "told ya." But guess what, I kicked some butt and worked that band while I had it -- then worked myself when I didn't. So when people would say about weight loss -- "HOW DID YOU DO IT?" (this will be your biggest problem) you can honestly say... the old fashioned way -- calories in/calories out. Or, "you know, diet and exercise."

Sometimes, I might be honest with someone I barely knew if I thought my experience would be beneficial. I didn't tell some of my best friends. I did tell some people after the surgery.

I GET it why you don't tell -- whether it be family and/or friends. There are judgments about obesity, there are judgements about WLS. Regardless of THEIR size. No one knows until you've been there.

So, hold your head high (I'd used vague hiatal hernia/bad indigestion), be proud. Know it is YOUR businesss. And YOUR truth.

And guess what, now that I'm bandless, I'm thinking about VSG and maybe I'll tell some people...and maybe I won't.

It's our body. It's our decision. We live it.

Eloray · January 14, 2011

You know we dont have tell everybody in our lives everything. If you are not ready than keep it to yourself. Spill the Beans when things feel right for you. Just make arrangements for a couple of months with your sister. Things will come around.

sleeveorbust · January 14, 2011

I totally understand where you are coming from with trying to not tell anyone about the surgery because originally I wasnt going to tell many people either....

HOWEVER...

I realized how hard it was going to be to build a lie on top of a lie on top of another lie and so i decided to bite the bullet and admit to myself that i am an adult and I made a decision to do something for myself and if they have something negative to say about it thats their perrogotave. I left it in their hands to deal with and it was a HUGE weight lifted off of my shoulders... AND the most unlikely person who I thought would bash my decision actually became one of my #1 supporters..... I dont know if my little bit of two cents helps you BUT to me it wasnt worth lying and some things in life arent easy but I took ownership of my decision regardless of their opinions

brownowl · January 17, 2011

So here is my dilemma. I have decided not to tell any family members besides my husband and a few of my girlfriends that I am getting wls. So I need to have a story as to why I might not be able to do things for a little while.. and I also visit my sister once a week and help her take care of her kids, how can I avoid not picking up the baby... so as I realize that lying isn't the best. I do not have another choice. If I say I'm having surgery for another reason.. they will all want to come and visit me.. so I guess I'm asking for tips from anyone who is also going through this situation of having to keep things from people. Just an FYI, I'm not telling them because when I have talked about it in the past they all we very negative about it.. this is for me not them!

hi i havent told even my sisters or brothers about my wls i have only discussed it with my 3 daughters and my husband who are all very supportive i havent told my work collegues or my boss that its wls i have said i am having a hernia repair thats got very large in my stomach and they are going to repair my hitues hernia as well they have acepted that as my reason to be off work hope this works for you xxx