Unsure of Wanting Surgery

[xrayman1971 0]

Hello to all of the forum members. Let me say I'm a bit unsure whether I want to have the VSG surgery. I have had weight issues my whole life. I'm currently 100 pounds over weight. My overeating has a lot to do with emotions, and depression. I have tried every diet out there. I can lose weight with no problems, but I have no success at keeping it off. I'm tired of being overweight. I have decided to have the VSG surgery. I'm aware of the possible complications, and it scares me. Has anybody who has had the VSG surgery had any MAJOR complications? I have a friend that is trying to talk me out of having the surgery as well. They are telling me I'm taking the easy way out. They have threatened to stop talking to me. I really want to have the surgery. I could really use some advice.

[lisabug 10]

Only you can make this decision. Don't let threats of other people make your decision. There is nothing easy about weight loss surgery. You still have to control what you chose to put in your mouth everytime you eat. Also you have tried at dieting and have like most of us have. If they are truly your friends they will support your decision to be healthy.

[Nikkeystar 12]

I'm almost 3 months out, I didn't have any complications but I will tell you that this is no way taking the easy way out. If they are truly your friends they would support your decision to be healthier and happier. I would do it all over again in a heart beat.

[Tiffykins 673]

As for making the decision, that really has to be on you.

As for your "friend" that is threatening to stop talking to you (that's such juvenile behavior at best), ask them "if I had a malignant tumor, would you quit talking to me for having it removed?" In my mind, having a large portion of my stomach removed, simply removed part of an organ that was allowing me to overeat, and led to my obesity. As for the easy way out, have your friend contact me, and I'll be more than happy to share with them the stone-cold facts on how it's NOT easy to have any WLS.

With friends like that, you don't need enemies. Honestly, if they can't be supportive, and positive then don't let them tell you how your going to live your life. It's your body, your future health, and if that friend wants you around for years to come without having to pop medications, or live with co-morbidities that will inevitably put you in an early grave, then they need to be supportive or they need to be out of your life.

[TexasT 99]

After my VSG surgery I only had one complication, and it wasn't a major problem. It was also due to having a lapband previously and having it removed. I developed a hematoma (pool of blood) in the area where my port had been. It got so big that the incision above it opened up and the blood came out. The doc cleaned it out and it healed from there.

As someone who has had 2 WLS procedures, you are making the right decision to get the VSG. In your case, I would suggest seeing a counselor before you do anything else and make sure you know this surgery will not solve your depression or emotional eating issues. It will make it easier to control what you put in your body, but I've seen a few people on this board that haven't done the "mental prep work" and end us just as miserable after surgery.

As for your friends, it sounds like they don't have your best interests at heart to say the least. Overweight friends may be secretly jealous and wish they could do the same, but lack the courage. Thin friends may prefer to hang out with people they don't have to feel "competitive" with in attracting the opposite sex, and now they may be afraid you'll get more attention. Those people have their own issues and lots of times don't even realize it.

It sounds to me like you're doing your research (you found us - ha!) and I trust you'll make the right choice. And if your friends can't handle the "new you", I'd start looking for new ones. Good luck!

[dbrjredd 0]

As for making the decision, that really has to be on you.

As for your "friend" that is threatening to stop talking to you (that's such juvenile behavior at best), ask them "if I had a malignant tumor, would you quit talking to me for having it removed?" In my mind, having a large portion of my stomach removed, simply removed part of an organ that was allowing me to overeat, and led to my obesity. As for the easy way out, have your friend contact me, and I'll be more than happy to share with them the stone-cold facts on how it's NOT easy to have any WLS.

With friends like that, you don't need enemies. Honestly, if they can't be supportive, and positive then don't let them tell you how your going to live your life. It's your body, your future health, and if that friend wants you around for years to come without having to pop medications, or live with co-morbidities that will inevitably put you in an early grave, then they need to be supportive or they need to be out of your life.

Very well said Tiffy! I was thinking the same things myself! A "true" friend will support you not turn their back on you!

Rhonda

[MrsMaddBroadway 1]

Well I don't know you personally... But I'll be your friend! And guess what, I fully support your decision to have this surgery and become a healthier person. In the end, it is your decision but don't let anyone discourage you from something really really important. My whole life my mother and other members of my family judged me and my weight! It was as if it was some horrible infection and everyone wished I would be normal! It didn't matter that I was the most beautiful, most talented, or smartest (talking about book smarts only here lol) in the family I was still considered the person with all the problems. Now that I have made the decision to lose this weight because I care about my health... My mother and everyone is trying to discourage me and say things like "why waste all that money on something that you could be doing yourself?" "you know you will have lots of nasty loose skin after" " I just don't think that is healthy you are just going to starve yourself... You should have the willpower to do it on your own!". Gosh, I wish I could go back in time and never say a word about this to anyone other than my husband. But ya deal with life as it unfolds... Stay positive andthink about the benefits of this surgery. F*ck anyone who wants you to fail no matter what you will have friends on this fourm. Good luck!

[Val-Mon 0]

I just signed up as a new member today and am waiting to be approved by my insurance carrier. I too am an emotional eater, pre-diabetic with hypertension and osteoarthritis. I am just as afraid not to have the surgery as I am of having it. I'm 5'2 and weigh 247 pounds but yet I'm terribly afraid of losing too much weight.

Secondly, is anyoner embarrassed about eating such small portions of food, i.e 1/2 of cup at each meal?

[scindie 0]

I was going to have the gastric bypass, which I did a lot of research and it scared the crap out of me.. A lot of possible side effects with that. Dumping syndrome, hair loss, malnutrition is a big one too. When I found out my insurance co would cover the sleeve, my personal Dr was very excited and recommended that surgery due to less complications.

Where I had my surgery done, which was Puget sound surgical center, I voiced my concerns about side effects and I also did my research. Unfortunately this is a newer procedure so not a lot of long term information. But, speaking to my Dr, he informed me out of the 250+ surgeries they had performed to date, they only had 3 complications. One, was due to issues the patient had prior, one was a leak and I cant remember what the other was from. I think having the sleeve will be one of the best decisions you ever make.

I hope your friends are just kidding when they say they will never speak to you again! A true friend will support your decision on this and you need that support when you have to make a life changing decision that will effect the rest of your life!

Best of luck to you

[Brooklyn732 7]

I think TexasT said it best. In your case I think you need to resolve your issues with food before you have the surgery. if you don't, you will still lose weight initially with the surgery but you will eventually sabotage yourself. I've seen a lot of stories about WLS "failure" but its not the surgery that fails, its the person. If you aren't mentally prepared to change your lifestyle, in my opinion, you shouldn't have the surgery.

I have been on a self imposed "pre-op" diet since August and I'm not getting sleeved until Feb 2011. But I'm doing it so that I'm mentally prepared. I went out to eat this weekend for my son's bday and instead of ordering the entree I ordered a cup of Soup and an appetizer. It wasn't the HEALTHIEST app they had, but the portion was small (ok and I snuck in a few bites of his dessert...lol) and it helped me to realize that even after I'm sleeved I can do the same thing and not feel funny about it.

If you need to lose the weight like you say you do, then do the "pre-work" you need to do to get yourself ready for the surgery. If that means talking to a psychologist or a nutritionist or attending OA then do it. This is a life changing decision and you have to be ready to make it.

If you do your research, the actual risk involved with the surgery is very minimal and comparable to any minor surgery. So that is really the least of your worries. The bigger thing to consider is if your mind is ready to accept what your body is going to be doing.

Good luck to you.

We are all here for you.

[gorditabonita50 1]

I to have been confronted by friends in regards to not having the surgery. But everyone is right and the decision has to b urs. I have decided I no longer want to inject myself 10 times a day with insulin. To me my health is the most important part of having this surgery and I want to live to c my grandchildren so the heck with the so called friends. I just registered today and I have a feeling I just found a whole lot of new wonderful friends.

[Billy363627 15]

If I have learned anything from these great people that this is nothing but a tool. Is is completely up to you what you put in your mouth after surgery. I feel sad that you have friends that are you friends so conditionally. You will find out really quickly that if you stay on here for any period of time you will have friends that will be your friend unconditionally.. We all support one another here no matter if it is good or bad.. I haven't had my sugery yet, but I know if I need answers these people on this forum are awesome. They are very straightforward ,honest and they will not candy coat it for you. I don't know how you other people feel but being healthy is better that the other alternative.. Heart diesease,diabetes,jointproblems,sleep apnea,highblood pressure, and a host of other great things you get from being overweight. Good luck..You always have a friend here if you need support