I'm MAJOR P.O'd HERE!!!!

[thinoneday 445]

So I'm going along with life thinking everything is wonderful and grand! Lost alot of weight, look good, feel happy, life is good all around. . . or so I thought. . I should have seen this coming but I'm sooooooooooo incredibly stupid!! Ya'll don't have a clue! 10 1/2 months out of surgery suddenly my gut decides that it needs to catch a "bug". . I can't puke cause I can't so I'm stuck with the worlds worst nausea for the past week. . .ok fine, yes i loose a few pounds, big deal!!! Well as of yesterday I was only have waves of nausea, not too bad, but still didn't eat much. . .i go to shower and as i'm drying off don't i over hear DH telling my daughter the following "Yeah your mom's be consistently sick now. It's that surgery. . I never supported her with this, she went behind my back and got the loan, she could have done this all by herself, dieting isn't hard. . i gained 7 lbs and it was so easy to loose, all she had to do was eat less and exercise. I don't know why she did this, it was so dumb" I was so shocked to overhear that. . I have not confronted him about it cause it was not true, he was the one who came to the seminar and told me he'd only support the sleeve and not the band, he came with me to get the loan, cause we used my daughters' car and he had to sign too, and finally dieting isn't easy when you have close to 200 lbs to loose, 7 lbs is not even a dent into the bucket. . . I am so hurt at this time that he would have said that. . I probably won't tell him i overheard, but be damned if i tell him anything is wrong with me anymore either. . . Thank you for listening, it may just be a petty rant, but i needed to get it off my chest cause it hurts. . . .

[Tiffykins 673]

Bullshit on a petty rant, I'd be livid as hell, and you're a better woman than me if you don't say something to him. He lied to your daughter, he totally backstabbed you, and your daughter deserves to know the truth.

I hope you feel better hun. Stomach bugs suck regardless if we have surgery or not. I wasn't a puker before surgery, and would avoid it at all costs. The nausea is a killer, and it just makes for a miserable existence.

Hang in there, hun. If I have to, I'll come there and get my mad ninja skills all up on his ass ! ! ! He deserves a swift kick to the ass for his snide, asinine and downright mean comments and lies! ! !

[thinoneday 445]

Bullshit on a petty rant, I'd be livid as hell, and you're a better woman than me if you don't say something to him. He lied to your daughter, he totally backstabbed you, and your daughter deserves to know the truth.

I hope you feel better hun. Stomach bugs suck regardless if we have surgery or not. I wasn't a puker before surgery, and would avoid it at all costs. The nausea is a killer, and it just makes for a miserable existence.

Hang in there, hun. If I have to, I'll come there and get my mad ninja skills all up on his ass ! ! ! He deserves a swift kick to the ass for his snide, asinine and downright mean comments and lies! ! !

I totally love the mad ninja skills up his butt comment! That made me laugh, no I told my daughter the truth this morning in a text! She knows how he is and probably just was listening going "oh yeah? Really?? Your kidding" . . . bless her heart, but it really bugs me alot to have heard that! it really really did. . . thanks for making me laugh! Your the best!

[juliarh 35]

I'm sorry, but I'd call him on it -- it's a bold faced lie and if he is being two-faced about it, I'd want to know -- he can't say one thing to you and then say another to someone else. It would be a serious face-to-face talk (with maybe some ninja moves thrown in ) -- but really, I cannot take someone not being honest with me or with someone else -- and frankly, I think the worst is that he did it behind your back. Ok, I'm getting off my soap box . . .

[breezy 8]

I'd be mad, too! I'm glad you put the truth in front of your daughter but I agree that you need to have a sit down with DH. You need to clear the air. Lack of trust in a relationship is a slow death. Sorry to hear you're sick, but congratulations on the weight loss. You rock.

[feedyoureye 3,087]

My guess is something else is bugging him. He was totally immature and non self realized to act out that way behind your back to your daughter... but my guess is he's afraid of your weight loss, or your sickness perhaps....afraid your going to die or be a burden or he said it: "she went behind my back"...fear of your independence....just playing phycologist here....you know him better than I do.

[BZButterfly79 19]

It's funny how people's insecurities come out at the worse time and makes them look like asses, I am sure they don't mean it the way it comes out, I would definitely wait until you are both calm and say something to him, as for your daughter have a heart to heart talk with her not with him there so she can get your side without interruptions from him. Sometimes I don't think man realize they are not necessities...they are bonuses!

[lisabug 10]

He would have a permanent residence on the couch. It is the complete disrespect of you that infuriates me. Are you avoiding a confrontation with him? It would make me wonder what else he has said behind my back and to whom.

I would let Tiffkins go ninja on his ass!!

[hopeandfaith 6]

OH WOW you are a BETTER women then I am. I would have unleashed a can of whoop ass right then and there!!! He would have gotten a GOOD tongue lashing! LOL I am a very VOCAL person! LOL I don't blame you for being hurt!!! Like one of my forums WHY DO PEOPLE HAVE TO BE SO CRUEL!!! I'm sorry this happened to you but you really do need to confront him. Otherwise, it will eat at you or at least it would eat at me!! Oh and I had the stomach bug this week too and I haven't been SLEEVED yet!! It wasnt' FUN!!! Good LUCK!!!

[MINI-Me 196]

I say buy Tiff a plane ticket & get this out in the air NOW!!!!

He is disrespecting you and your relationship. You guys need to talk and talk sooner rather than later. Confront him with the lies, share your hurt & ask him what is REALLY going on.

[SouthernSleever 228]

Ohhh Gurrrrl. OHHHH GURRRL! I'd totally have to say something to him about that instead of letting it fester in you. I'm sure he's just scared that you are getting sick and losing more weight but I'd call him out on it.

[thinoneday 445]

You guys are all the best! Wish I could just give you ALL one big hug ((((()))))). . . your all my cyber family and love each and every one of you. . . your the only ones who really understand and care! Thank you so much for your responses, they made me smile and guess what? I'm having it out with the bumbaclat tonight! :argue: How dare he lie like that! Daughter even called me and asked what was wrong with dad last night. . . if he forgot he had gone with me and it was HIM who called her and explained I was getting the sleeve done. . .errrrrr I'm feelin a bit better but he won't be later on. . . . :boxing:

[Globetrotter 1,340]

what. a. f***ing. a**hole.

[coops 1,790]

Hey, thinoneday,

I have to be honest here... if I had heard my hubby say that to himself, never mind my daughter, you would have heard the black las across the pond!!

I would not be happy about it ... at all ... and fair play to you for not shooting from the gut and doing a rant as I would have done!

I am glad that you have taken some time out to calm down before having a chat with him ... hope all goes well! x

[thinoneday 445]

ok, so heres the update on what happened here . . . so I've been going around all week stating "yeah well at least I don't lie on you" he just laughs this comment off but every now and then asked "how did I lie on you?" so yesterday i "gently" bring up the topic of having overheard him lie about the surgery. . . well didn't the shit hit the fan on his part. . . thank god i had had a glass of wine and was all mellowed out. . . I told him step by step very calmly what i heard and EXACTLY how it went. . .can you believe the bugger actually agreed that yes, he did tell daughter he wasn't supporting the band but was supporting the sleeve, and can you believe he agreed he did come to the bank, etc. . . but then he turned it around and said i went behind his back and secured a loan without him knowing. . .i "calmly" explained that i had to do that because i had to see if i could even get a loan for such a thing and that it was only good for 30 days anyhow . . . if i couldn't get the loan i wouldn't even had persuded the topic. . . i told him this was last october and the surgery wasn't till december. . the loan wasn't any good and WE had to reapply for a more expensive loan cause HE wanted the sleeve and not the band for which the first loan was for. . . well, I told him I didn't appreciate him lying on me AT ALL but that i forgive him. . . know what that bumbaclat said? "there is nothing for forgive here i did nothing wrong" and you know he is now giving me the cold shoulder and has not apologized at all. . . .33 years of marriage and it the love continues! He is an incredible stubborn jackass. . . . thank you for listening!