Twentysomething Bandsters

[Arcael 0]

Coconut, that's like the story of my life! I honestly never had a boyfriend until now. And it took a pile of bricks to make me realize that SOMEONE was interested. I never went to any school dances, never went on a 'real' date in high school, and hadn't even had my first kiss until I was 27 years old. Yeah, it's embarassing to admit that, but I think I'm not alone. I'm sure I have other issues because plenty of big girls date and get married. The question is, how do we address those issues?

The question is if it is really an issue. I've dated a little bit, from junior high all the way until after my first year in college. It's all about confidence and esteem. If you don't love yourself, then you should be working on that before you try to get yourself into any serious relationship.

At the moment for me being single is the logical choice, as I'm going a lot through changes and may not come out the same person I was.

Another thing it could be is your personality, I've been tested to be INTP/ENTP (50/50 on I and E) which shows that I'm a pretty reclusive type of person some of the time. If you take a MBTI personality test , this should give you a good result: http://similarminds.com/embj.html

after you finish it should give you a four letter code, like ENTP or ISFJ or some combination of any of those 8 letters.

just type in that code in google and it will pull up some descriptions about the different personality types

Personally, I consider myself INTP.

[aus_colleen 0]

booda,

I HATED getting banded so young, it was like i was giving up and that I am weak!!! I didnt tell anyone ( i still dont tell many people) it is like my dirty little secret.

It has only since I have been uneder 100kg that i love my band (the last 2months) It has given me the freedom to control my eating and I look good now and I am itching to travel!!!!!

[itsjustducky 0]

Hi, I'm new here = ) I'm 23, and like most of u, I have been heavy by whole life. After trying every diet under the sun, I started to think about surgery when a friend of mine had gastric bypass. Seeing how sick he got from it, however, I knew that it wasn't for me. Then one day I heard about the band... after doing some research, I talked it over w/ my parents and decided to bite the bullet this summer since would be my last one b4 college graduation.

I was banded on August 12th, and I went for my 1st fill a week ago. So far, I have lost 32lbs. and I'm pretty happy with that b/c I've never been abole to keep off more than 20lbs. at a time b4--diets just never seemed to work for me. It's kinda funny, but I actually just stumbled across this site b/c I was having trouble eating an apple earlier, and I wanted to know if this was a common occurrance after a fill. I know oranges need to have everything peeled off of them, but I'm not sure if this is true 4 apples. Anyone know? Thanks 4 your help!

[liberty2003 0]

If you don't love yourself, then you should be working on that before you try to get yourself into any serious relationship.

.

Got any good advice on how to boost self esteem, causse let me tell you..I really don't have alot of confidence or esteem and i try to do things to boost it but it doesn't seem to work...

~Kristen

[puddin 7]

The question is if it is really an issue. I've dated a little bit, from junior high all the way until after my first year in college. It's all about confidence and esteem. If you don't love yourself, then you should be working on that before you try to get yourself into any serious relationship.

At the moment for me being single is the logical choice, as I'm going a lot through changes and may not come out the same person I was.

Another thing it could be is your personality, I've been tested to be INTP/ENTP (50/50 on I and E) which shows that I'm a pretty reclusive type of person some of the time. If you take a MBTI personality test , this should give you a good result: http://similarminds.com/embj.html

after you finish it should give you a four letter code, like ENTP or ISFJ or some combination of any of those 8 letters.

just type in that code in google and it will pull up some descriptions about the different personality types

Personally, I consider myself INTP.

I don't think I have self-esteem issues, but heck, I've been wrong before. I've never felt really attractive to men, but now I've got a wonderful, good-looking man. I just had to lose some weight to feel confident enough with the opposite sex. I kept saying, "I won't date until I look as good as I want my man to be." It's pretty superficial, really. My other problem is that I don't flirt. I think flirting is all about having the confidence to be REJECTED.

As far as personality goes... let's not go there. Perhaps some personality types date more because they're more outgoing, but I don't think the test will help you in the dating world, but maybe you can shed some light on that. BTW, mine was ENTP.

[Arcael 0]

Got any good advice on how to boost self esteem, causse let me tell you..I really don't have alot of confidence or esteem and i try to do things to boost it but it doesn't seem to work...

~Kristen

Just look at what you've accomplished

85 pounds is insane, and I'm sure I could name a bunch of other qualities if I knew more about you. Try trying on some new clothes, go out clubbing with some friends, talk to some old friends/family, or go to a local lap-band support group and give others confidence to succeed (It's great to have people luck to you for advice and admire what you have done).

Hell, if you want my msn is chris_sjoblom@msn.com (this goes for anyone else that just wants to chat or something)

I always try to answer when people PM me and I'm usually online

As far as personality goes... let's not go there. Perhaps some personality types date more because they're more outgoing, but I don't think the test will help you in the dating world, but maybe you can shed some light on that. BTW, mine was ENTP.

Oh it doesn't really have much to do with the dating world at all, it just has to do with understanding who you are and why you take a certain approach to certain things. I know from reading that NTP's are quite independent. A lot of people wonder who they are, and while the system isn't perfect it can help people understand themselves.

Also the post wasn't really directed towards just you it was to anyone wondering . Also, I didn't know if you had low self-esteem or not what I said did not come out correctly I apologize.

[laurenm13 0]

Hello all....I just wanted to pop in and say howdy! I like seeing people my age here. My life story pretty much is: I was a normal sized young'n till 8th grade. I fell into a slight depression and weight gain followed. Then, in high school, I joined my color guard and shed the lbs. Then I quit my sr yr and bobbled back and forth. And then college was my total downfall I was and am still happy but whenever my group gets together, food is usually involved. Now at this time, out of my 5 closest friends, 3 are banded. So I have a wonderful support system waiting for me when my time finally comes. I guess to sum it up. Happy moments and family time all center around food.....and I want to change that for me!

[KariK 0]

Hi, Im 29, so I just have to join in lol. Its my last chance to be in the 20's crowd!

[liberty2003 0]

Im single again ..Why are guys such A**holes

How is everyone's day going? I HOPE better then mine.

~Kristen

[bandmaster 0]

Hi everyone! I have been married almost 2 years, but i thought being single was great. I adore my husband and in the 2 years we have been together I have been very thin, had back surgery, gained 140 pounds and had lap band surgery! Through it all he loves me the same and is so supportive. When I met him I had just been dumped by a boyfriend (who was supposed to go on vacation with me) Well, I went on vacation by myself and ended up sitting in my husband's seat on the airplane! You never know when you are going to meet that person you will spend the rest of your life with - But, as I said being single was great! I moved to a new city every few years, reinvented myself, and worked on becoming the person I wanted to be. Enjoy it, you are on the right path to improve yourself. Have fun and enjoy getting to know yourself - you will find someone when it's time. I really believe everything happens for a reason and sometimes it takes a few years before we recognize that reason.