vacillation

[ladyrider 1]

Oh, the vacillation. It is making me crazy.

I did the research, selected a surgeon, and have a date.

But I watch Dr Oz on t.v. and see all these people come out who have lost the weight through diet and exercise, and I wonder...am I taking the easy way out? Will people look at me as a person who was too weak to do this on her own so she goes to mexico and pays for a surgically enforced diet? I have tried every diet, even hypnosis, to the point where I have no faith in diets. This is honestly my only hope, but this freaking vacillating is driving me crazy. Did anyone else have this problem? My surgery is scheduled for February.

[Stacy160 201]

All I can say is, I wish all those Dr. Oz people could be shown again in 3-5 years, and let's see where they are then. If they're like 98% of everyone else, all of us before surgery, they'll be right back where they started, and worse.

This is for you and your health and future... and frankly, screw what anyone else thinks! You won't regret it. :scared0:

[Tiffykins 673]

I'll ditto Stacie's comments. Honestly, I'm not sure why anyone considers this the easy way out. Yes, the surgery makes it easier, but by no means is the entire process easy. The mental aspect alone is a huge feat. Add in the physical changes, and difficult transition to changing our entire relationship with food, how can anyone consider that easy?

I had zero issues losing weight before. I could drop 40-50 pounds without issue. Sadly, sh)t happens and I'd gain it back. At least with the sleeve, I've got a fighting chance to keep it off this time. I'm not foolish to think I will escape some regain. History tends to repeat itself, but at least I know that I'll never regain the 145lbs I lost with the sleeve. I'll be okay with a little bounce back, and now the sleeve gives me power to make better choices. I can still suck down a 3000 calorie milkshake if I want to. It's the lack of desire that keeps me out of the Sonic drive-thru. Without the sleeve, I'd still be hitting Baskin Robbins for ice cream, or ordering dessert with every meal.

Once I decided that I wanted to lose the weight, I never wavered from my decision. When it was time to revise from the band, I was ready for the sleeve. I never saw it as easy, I knew that I'd have to work on more than just the physical. For me, ensuring I was hitting calorie, carb and Protein goals, clear fluids intake and the like was far from easy. I had dieting down to a science, but the lifestyle change is what a lot of people don't take into account when they see WLS as an "easy out" for us fatties.

Don't fall into the trap that WLS is the easy answer. If you do, you'll be highly disappointed that you have to work your butt off to get to goal. I won't lie and say I struggled to lose, I never stalled, I never saw a true gain during my losing stage, BUT, I fought to get to goal in 6.5 months. I stuck my nose to the grindstone, followed the rules, and didn't give in when things got tough.

[chilo1 62]

I agree w Stacy and Tiffy, I remember telling my mum the first few days, who ever dares to say to me it's the easy way out (not that I told many people) are so wrong! It's hard work, both emotionally and physically. I think only now, 7 weeks out I'm starting to get used to the not snacking and eating tiny portions, and now, (I don't know if it's because I read that so many of you aren't hungry or my body is only now responding to the lack of ghrelin) I'm not even hungry anymore. But as Tiff said if you think this is a quick easy fix you will be disappointed!

[thinoneday 445]

I totally agree with Tiff, Stacy and Chilo, first off who the hell cares what others think, we are not here losing our weight to please other people or care what they think. . . secondly, you have to work with the sleeve, it's not easy! I don't know where people get off saying its the easy way out. . they are just jealous cause they can't do it. . . stupid a$$es. . .sorry that just gets my goat! (I am a Aries after all hehehe)

[goodlife 3]

Ditto what everybody else said!

[MlkPas 5]

You know what? I say "Let's hear it for the easy way out!" For me, it hasn't been easy but it's been one hell of a lot easier than dieting and starving and exercising like a maniac for hours every day.

What the heck is wrong with losing weight and getting healthy the easy way?? I say "Hooray for the easy way!" It's giving me back my life after 40 years of yo-yo dieting!!

Edited September 17, 2010 by MlkPas

[ladyrider 1]

Great response. Thanks!

[Dave_NW 92]

Ladyrider, let me offer a male point of view:

I've always been great at dieting. I can go on ANY diet, and lose great weight. But ya know what? When I go OFF the diet for any reason, the weight FLOODS back on. Not because I overeat, not because I'm lazy, and not because I'm weak. It comes back because my body has a balance it is trying to maintain, and it always wins. I lost 30 pounds on the South Beach Diet in two months. I was thrilled. Two months after that, I'd gained back SIXTY POUNDS. Despite everything I've ever tried, with each year that goes by, I weigh more and more. And I'm sick of it.

I'm sick of being the marginalized fat guy in every roomful of people. I'm sick of worrying whether the airline seat will fit me, and whether the seatbelt will adjust far enough out to buckle. I'm sick of always being the designated driver, because I know I can't fit my excess body into the seat of the expensive European sports car my best friend owns. I'm sick of feeling, looking, and walking like an old man. I'm sick of being a pedestrian in my own life. And I'm sick of the fat jokes being made all around me, but most often by myself, as I try everything I can do to be accepted by my peers.

Dr. Oz and whoever the heck else can parade success stories by the dozens across the TV stage as inspiration for those of us out here in the dark who will never be "that person." For every success story, there are thousands - no, TENS of thousands, of people just like me. Perfectly nice folks who just happen to have a lifelong battle with excess weight.

If I've achieved enough in my life to have the extra money enough to pay for a way out of the Fat Guy Club, then I'm damn sure going to take that opportunity, and give it all I've got to finally, once and for all, win my personal battle of the bulge.

You should let yourself vacillate awhile. Embrace it, and let your obviously intelligent mind come to its own conclusion. And if you ultimately decide that you DESERVE to have this surgery, then nobody has the right to make you feel like you're anything less than a wonderful person who has taken her personal bull by the horns, and is going to win this fight.

This forum is filled with people just like you, and reading the success stories of those on the other side, amazing people like TIffykins, will provide you with a LOT of (pardon the pun) food for thought. I'm thrilled I found this place, and I'm looking forward to having my surgery within the next few months. I vacillated for quite awhile, but now I know it's the right choice for me. And nobody is going to take that away from me.

I wish you nothing but success in this battle, and I'm looking forward to seeing "less" of you. :thumbup1:

Best success wishes,

Dave

[ladyrider 1]

Thanks so much for the awesome speach. I feel better, and I can totally relate to everything you said. I wish you success also. When is your surgery? Can I ask if you are going outside of the states? I am scheduled for Feb 4th, Dr Aceves. I think I will quit watching Dr Oz for awhile. Every time I see those weight loss stories, I think to myself, "Why can't I do that?" They make it seem like anybody that really wants to lose can do it. Keep us posted on how your journey. Thanks again.

[Dave_NW 92]

It's my pleasure to offer whatever support to others that I can. They're helping me just as much.

My surgery will be in Seattle later this year, (no date set as yet), with a surgeon (Dr. Ross McMahon) who is the head of the surgery center at Swedish Hospital. He's a pretty amazing doctor who is highly recommended. I know I'll be in good hands.

I've read on this forum nothing but good things about Dr. Aceves and his clinic. I know you'll have a successful surgery with them. Meantime, keep reading, and don't be afraid to ask the nagging questions that bother you - folks here are tremendously supportive.

Dave

[ladyrider 1]

thanks again Dave. Pls keep me posted on your journey. You must be getting excited.