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Scared and ambivalent...Help! (long)



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:crying:Hi, Awesome site. So here is my story. I was banded 12/3/07 and had nothing but problems. I lost the wt alright, and really fast, but then had a dilitation and had to be unfilled for 3 months. And its been that way on and off ever since. Any fill was too much, caused sliming, vomiting and general misery. Finally I had enough and asked for revision to the sleeve. It was approved right away ( and I am scheduled for 9/14). I was a "lite weight" with a bmi of 35 at the get go. Lost about 70 pounds, but with no fill most of the time since, about 25-30 lbs has creeped back up. I won't lie, I have been out of control for a while despite saying to myself that I would never ever let that happen again. I was horrified to go from sz 8 to 10 to 12 and now 14 (I had been a 22 at my highest wt). Soooo I have a couple of basic fears; first that I will lose too much wt (176 now) and second that I won't be able to get myself under control. Any help, advice, admonishments, tips will all be appreciated. Thx.

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Every body is different and I can clearly tell you that it is normal to worry. At first I was like "yeah right lose too much weight" but when I went for my 6 or 7 week visit and noticed i had lost 53 lbs, I started to wonder myself. Then the weight just fell off, I went from the highest of 350 to my lowest of 225 within 6 months. . . but. . . then my body stopped dead in its tracks. . . I held a plateau for 3 1/2 months, wouldn't budge at all. . . it's natures way of letting the brain catch up with the body I think. . . I ate everything but in tiny amounts. . .I didn't care anymore thinking that i was meant to stay fat at 230 lbs forever. . . then I took a mini vacation and when i came back well hell, i had lost 5 lbs. . . the darn plateau was over. . . it made me aware that i do have to watch what i shovel into my mouth and i have to exercise. . i was really happy so now i'm back on track again. . . with the sleeve you will eat small amounts (very small amounts) yes, you can definately get out of control by finding slider foods (mostly carbs, they go down really good) I felt like a kid in a candy store, dense Protein hurt, toast and chips didn't, veggies killed me, chocolate and ice cream didn't, but you have to really really want this in order not to let it control you. I was lucky I never gained any weight with getting out of control. . . now i'm back in control, the head hunger is horrible, it haunts me all the time, but you must believe in what you want and concentrate on the goal. . . I hope this helps a bit, most times i feel I just ramble. . . good luck, your going to do great, just like the rest of us. . .

Edited by thinoneday

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Thanks, it does help just to vent and to have someone listen and respond. I have really tried to get a grip for the past week and hopefully I can maintain that. My pre op is 8/30. Thx again.

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