I just don't understand

[NJnewgirl12 0]

Hello all my VSG'ers...

In 2012 Im going to have Vsg in Mexico as i am a self payer and is doing this with my tax return money. Im 28 married and have 3 beautiful children.. I weigh 340 lbs and have a BMI of 54.9. Sine the age of 8 i've struggled with my weight. I would lose weight and put it right back on. In 2000 i looked into gastric bypass but was denied approval..:crying:

So just recently i discovered MEXICO :w00t: and how different the self pay prices were to America's and now a window has opened for me and im going to climb through it.

My mother lives with my husband and i... and just recently my brother as well... I told them both on seperate occasions about my choice.. and boy, oh boy why did i do that ! Now mind you they are both overweight and morbidly obese just as myself.. one by 50 lbs and the other by 200 + lbs... I was told all i have to do is get active and watch what i eat and the weight will come off.. True , and i've done that ..but the weight just comes back no matter what i do.. and i don't want to diet for the rest of mylife or take fat burning supplements everyday..I want a chance at a NORMAL life.

Then i ask so why are you still 200+lbs over weight if that's all you have to do? Answer: Because i stopped taking my Hydroxy cut and fell on hard times... lol That's my point, that's not normal. You just don't stop taking hydoxy cut and gain 200 lbs back.. I then explain that we must have a fat gene because no matter how much we lose our body want's to hold on to that fat.. and i want to change all of that and VSG will help me..

Just like hydroxy cut helps you! It's just that my VSG is a permenet solution and not a pill popping one as yours....

This person had a lot of negative feelings about the surgery and so did the other one.. They know the struggle and what it's like.. and they turned Noses up anyway :sleep0:.. I don't get it ?

On the other hand my husband and father who has NEVER had a weight problem EVER are happy, supportive, encouraging, i'll go to Mexico with you, follow your heart and dreams blah, blah, blah... :001_wub: They say just do your research with a fine tooth comb. Talk with those that have had the surgery, check out the facility, make sure you are in good health to prepare for the surgery, make a list of questions to ask and so on.. They are not putting themselves and personal feelings into this but is telling me to just do my research and choose the best surgeon and not to miss a thing...and look at the best interest of ME..

I don't understand this because normally the fat ones are so

"gung ho" with the procedure and the skinny ones with no understanding and has never walked in my shoes are the ones saying

" just go and hit the gym" and " push back from the table"

I thought my mother and brother who i look to for support would be there for me and understand but they don't .. and in all honesty She is where i get most of my support from..

I feel if i don't have this/these persons approval im going to fail or run into complications and in the end regret this decision... and it's going to be an " I told you so" situation. She is a rock in my life and a constant one at that..and she's never led me the wrong way. I just don't know how to take this all....

Please chime in people :001_tongue: I'd like to hear your thoughts and opinions... Sorry i know it's a lengthy one.. but i had to get it out...

[MINI-Me 196]

I think it's hard for people who are obese themselves to come to terms with the surgery - if you aren't ready, you aren't ready. Seeing someone else take charge of their life and make positive decisions is difficult for them. Most likely, they aren't even aware of these feeling. And, they are probably VERY worried about you - especially if you start talking travel to Mexico.

Are there any surgeons in your area that you can visit for a free seminar? If so, even if you aren't interested in using their services, go. It will help with your research. Ask if your mother or brother would like to go along to hear and/or ask questions. You may just find that you have a new travel companion. If not, at least you've learned more and can be more sure of your decision.

You may not have their support, but it sounds like you have others in your life. Good for you. We can also be a sounding board for you.

Best of luck in your decision making process.

Just another thought ... does your insurance not cover any WLS? I find it hard to believe you were denied WLS with your BMI level. If they do cover WLS, it might be worth another try if your BMI has significantly increased since the last time. You were also quite young back then, your new age might assist an approval as well.

Edited August 2, 2010 by MINI-Me
Added information

[citizenwill 7]

Maybe it's just lack of information. I chose not to tell any of my family members, except one sister whom I am closest with.

Because the procedure is still relatively new perhaps your mother is confusing it with one of the more extreme procedures? I almost had to draw a diagram for my sister until she got what I was talking about. Now she is wanting the surgery.. lol..

My mother is to old now and I know she would not understand. Plus, I am her youngest son and she will automatically assume the worst and most horrible outcomes (being a protective mother).

In her case ignorance is bliss.

I agree with Mini, maybe make your mom part of your journey so she can get used to the idea and ease her mind.

Your brother may be jealous or just be being a stinker or maybe he is just feeding off your mothers reaction.

Will

[NJnewgirl12 0]

Minime... They aren't willing to attend a seminar with me.. been there done that..They cock the neck to the side and roll eyes..... and Yes i've attended seminars on the sleeve and even gastric bypass.....I've know about the VSG for some time now Im just making THEM aware of it, it's not new to me...

I've heard very good things about certain Dr's in Mexico. I know it all sounds scary but that's why im going to do my part and Investigate.

No my insurance policy doesn't cover any form of WLS.. reguardless of BMI.. I've checked my policy and was even told by a represenative it wasn't included in our package that the job choose..

Thanks for the insight....

[val628 1]

i have found for some people who are overweight or obese there is an element of jealousy. there are some people who i work with that this seems to be the case. my response has been they can do what ive done, but its alot of work. you still need to watch what you eat (i do not feel that I diet, but that i try to eat healthy) and you need to exercise. i wish you very good luck

[NJnewgirl12 0]

CitizenWill... I should of been like you and kept my big mouth shut !!! I just didn't think i would get that kind of reaction from them.. Im the youngest like you but i don't think that has anything to do with it... Here's my thing.. Im a pretty smart girl.. I didn't screw up my life the way my siblings did.. I didn't/don't have my parents worrying about me and constanly praying for me as they do with my brother and sister.. Why ?? because i make sound decisions and choices for my life.. My parents even come to me for advice.. I've always played it safe.. and that hasn't changed and they know that.. So why is my credibility thrown out of the window all of a sudden ??? It doesn't really matter anymore.. because i've made my choice and it's VSG !

[citizenwill 7]

Your absolutely right. In the end it's your decision and your a big girl.

Funny what you said about your siblings. All of mine sound the same. I am the one who is constantly sorting out their messes and the only one that made a success of myself. In the end I only answer to me.

You go girl!

Will

[sheila2050 17]

My sister had sleeve surgery in July. I went with her. Now I plan on having it after seeing how well she did and how well she was treated. The point is, people can change their minds about things. I'd say take the high road and let yourself be okay with your family's skepticism. After all, it may change. You and only you can be true to yourself. My surgery is 9/26 with Dr. Jaime Kelly in Tijuana.< /p>