Scared and scared I'm going to cancel and bolt

[trouble 0]

OK my surgery is scheduled for next Tuesday the 27th to have my band taken out and to go to the sleeve. I am sooo scared. Today I'm really considering canceling my surgery. My fear is the unknown. I'm very excited about the outcome of after the surgery but with my band there were times I was miserable. At times I had reflux so bad when I layed down at night that I could not sleep unless I was sitting up in a chair. During these times I was miserable. I actually had my band Fluid removed because of it and am almost back to pre band weight. I had lost 87 lbs and now am 10 lbs from my pre band weight. My fear is that when if I get the sleeve and this happens or I feel this way I'm stuck with it for life and I could not stand that. I'd rather be heavy and happy than skinny and miserable. Has anyone had this problem with the sleeve?

[MINI-Me 196]

I think the reflux issues you are describing are quite common with the band. I've never had one, but I have friends who have. I had intermittent acid reflux issues before the sleeve, but Prilosec keeps my symptoms at bay. My doctor and I have decided to keep me on it for 1 year & then try to wean off - just didn't want to have to deal with new eating, losing weight, and possible reflux at the same time.

Don't cancel your surgery. Talk to your surgeon about your fears and his plans if you do have reflux issues. Best of luck!

[BlackBerryJuice 349]

My surgery is 10 days after yours and I can relate to your concerns, even though I've never had a band. I think all of us experience at least a few moments of doubt, fear, or worry prior to the surgery - and probably even more so in the first few weeks after. There's no way to predict how you're going to feel and what life is going to be like after. I think the most important piece of information for me came in the form of a few old threads where people said things like "I wish I hadn't done this, I feel miserable," and the like - and then the same people post 6 months later (and 60 pounds lighter) saying they are happy they went through the surgery. Someone made a poll a few weeks ago asking people if they would've gone through the surgery now that they know what it's like, and I don't think a single person said no. So I think in the end, if you go to an experienced doctor with a good record, you won't regret it, even though you might have a couple of "bad days" at the beginning.

[trouble 0]

Yes my fear is definately the unknown. I find myself with family or my kids thinking other than being over weight I'm very happy, what if this surgery being permanent changes my life forever and I can never enjoy these moments in a happy way. With the band it was easier to jump in because I knew it could be undone if it messed me up. With this my fear is being permanent if something is wrong then I'm stuck with it for life. Just very scary. My husband started worrying today so I think that's made my worried go way up and overboard.

[BlackBerryJuice 349]

I'm not even that afraid of the BIG stuff - i.e. what if something goes truly wrong - I have a leak, I have a reaction to anesthesia, I don't wake up after anesthesia, period. With these BIG things, I just comfort myself with the knowledge that the surgeon I've chosen has an impeccable record and years of experience, so the odds of anything bad happening because of what he does are almost zero. And if something happens that's not his fault - well, that's something you can't control. Something terrible can happen at any minute, regardless of whether or not we have the surgery.

More often, I worry about the little things. The other day I went on a really long hike (about 3 hours). It was really hot, so I stopped more than once to take a couple of HUGE swigs of Water. Then I immediately realized that I won't be able to do this for a good 6 months after surgery. Does it mean I can't go on a challenging hike or run a 5K for half a year without worrying about getting dangerously dehydrated? I worry more about silly stuff like that, I don't know if it makes me weird. I feel like I already have enough to worry about in terms of dealing with emotional eating and head hunger when I'm physically unable to act on that urge (I'm afraid I'll turn into a valkyrie), I don't want to have to deal with MORE stuff that can change my life for worse.

[trouble 0]

I worry about those things too. But it's more like I'm worried that those are the things that will happen to change my home life. My insurance does not pay for this so I'm having to pay out of pocket so I worry if anything goes wrong and extra surgery or things need to be done then here I am in more debt.

Reading other's posts it seems people have a hard time not being able to eat more or getting used to the small amounts. Since I had the band before I went through that and those things didn't really bother me. When My band worked I felt full most of the time and pretty much had to make myself eat so I'm thinking those won't be issues for me. (hopefully). I've really prayed about this a lot before I made the decision to go on with this surgery and I guess when My husband started worrying today it made me wonder if that was a sign from God that I needed to cancel. I know stupid but I am just really worried. I remember being worried before my band but nothing like this.

[BlackBerryJuice 349]

Well, I think it would be weird if he DIDN'T worry. My boyfriend went through a phase where he actually CRIED at the thought of me getting the surgery (he won't be here for the first 2.5 weeks, either) - thankfully, it's over for now, haha. I've avoided telling my parents so I didn't have to worry about my mother freaking out. I can't imagine someone NOT worrying at least a bit if they care about you at all. So I don't think you should look at the fact that your husband is worried as some sort of omen. Are you not confident about your surgeon's ability or something? Do you have access to any professional post-surgery psychological support? If not, try going to Overeaters Anonymous. I went there once, and there were some WLS people there. That was a few years ago, though, before the sleeve was really on anyone's radar - everyone had RNYs.

[TX HS FB Coach 0]

I am getting the sleeve on Mon. July 26 and I also have anxiety. My main issue is that I am a HS football coach and I want to be ready to go in a couple of weeks. I realize I will be limited the first 1-2 weeks after surgery but I want to be ready to go by Aug. 9. I also share the worry about getting dehydrated and not being able to satisfy my thirst.

Does anyone have personal experiences as to when the "mushy" food stage began for you and what are some good mushy foods that you felt agreed with your new stomach.

[KathyM 14]

Trouble -

I was sleeved 5 days ago and about 30 min before my surgery I got really scared and didn't think I could go through with it - but I did. And you know what? I am so glad I did. I think I posted on another thread that it was the best gift I could ever give myself and I truly believe that. I did feel pretty tough for about the first 6 hrs after surgery but by the next morning (my surgery was at 6pm) I was up and showering had little if any discomfort and it has only gotten better from there! You have half of the post op battle won - you already know what the adjustments to eating smaller portions are like from your lapband. I really think that your husband knows you are afraid and that makes him afraid too. Talk to your surgeon and tell him your fears, and if you aren't ready just yet then wait until you are. You need to do what is right for you. I hope you can find peace with whatever you decide sweetie.

TX HS FB Coach -

I was sleeved on Friday the 16th and can start the mushy/soft stage this Friday. There are alot of good threads about what to eat in those stages here, you might try looking around for them. A few things I have seen that others are eating in this stage are scrambled eggs, mashed potatoes, refried Beans, cottage cheese, applesauce, soft cooked veggies, tuna-chicken-egg salad, cheeses, yogurt and I have seen where several like to take a deli slice of turkey with cream cheese rolled up - I can't wait to try that one. I hope this helps some.

[YOLANDA240 13]

Yes my fear is definately the unknown. I find myself with family or my kids thinking other than being over weight I'm very happy, what if this surgery being permanent changes my life forever and I can never enjoy these moments in a happy way. With the band it was easier to jump in because I knew it could be undone if it messed me up. With this my fear is being permanent if something is wrong then I'm stuck with it for life. Just very scary. My husband started worrying today so I think that's made my worried go way up and overboard.

Trouble,

I completly understand what you are talking about, once your sleeved your always sleeved. I have not had my surgery yet my insurance made me wait six months I was mad then, but happy now because in the six months I've done more research and spoken to patients after their surgery my fear has gone. I'm now worried about small things like "am I going to remember to sip my water" etc

All I can say is don't worry that your scared be more worried if you were not. :001_rolleyes:

[Lillie24 2]

Trouble - talk to your doctor about your concerns. Personally I have never had the band so I can't compare to what you are going through. It is a life decision. I don't regret my decision in the least but if the reflux is that much of an issue for you I would not hesitate to contact my doctor about it.

[cwalker 12]

I am 3 months out and the drinking thing was better by 3 weeks for me, i can at 3 months take large swallows of Water without any problem. I know there are several members who have been so happy to be rid of the band and finally nausea free/pain free.

[Tiffykins 673]

I had the band, and just to let you know it's like night and day vs. the sleeve.

Yes, immediately after surgery pretty much sucks, but hey, we're protecting our staple line so we have to suck it up and deal with it. I assure you I absolutely do not miss any particular foods because I'm able to eat anything I want. I have an active social life which the band pretty much destroyed. I take Prilosec 20mg once daily, and have zero reflux issues. I didn't have it before the sleeve, got a twinge of it about 6 weeks post-op, and been on Prilosec since. Technically, I could wean off of it, but my thought process is "don't fix something that isn't broken."

With the sleeve, you can be skinny and amazingly happy ! ! ! I promise, I'm living proof of it.

For me, being fat brought more misery than I ever realized. I know now what it's like to walk 5-8 miles and not think twice about it. I can now roll around on the floor with my dogs, husband and kid, and not worry about having to "waddle" my way back up. I can fit into normal clothing, and not have to buy bra extenders, anklet extenders, bracelets that are 9" long, and not to mention the co-morbidities that would have at some point taken over my life. I know many obese people in my family that take 4-10 meds per day just so their bodies will function somewhat properly because of their obesity related diseases or conditions that have no cure other than losing weight.

So, I had to weight the options:

1) Lose my part of my stomach BUT lose weight and regain back a part of my life

2) Stay fat, pop pills, and pray I get to see my child marry, have children of his own, and maybe enjoy grandchildren without obesity holding me back.

I also read someone compare VSG to divorcing an abusive partner. It's so true ! ! ! I feel like I kicked a horrid partner out of my life and all it did was allow me to overeat, eat craptastic food, and control my life. I have the control now, and I'm loving life.

[trouble 0]

I'm confident in my doctor. That is one area that I am happy. I've heard for years that the doctor I have is one of the best Surgeons in town. He does everyday surgeries as well as the bariatric surgeries. When I mentioned in the office the day I made my surgery date, that I was scared the office lady said, no worries for you, you have the best surgeon around. So that makes me confident. I think I'm just freaking myself out with the unknown. Worrying about things that may never need to be worried about. I feel better seeing that others have the same worries.

FB Coach:

When I had my lapband done the after surgery eating was the same. My doctor told me that the times aren't set in stone. You will know when your stomach is ready for the next stage. IT may be in 5 days instead of 7 etc. I ate baked potatoes and cheese a lot. I'm a really picky eater so didn't like a lot of anything. My doctor gave me a list of of items for each stage for ideas. You might ask your doctor if they have something like that for you.

[trouble 0]

Tiffykins, Thank you soooo much. You helped so much. Let me ask all of you something. You mentioned the staples. That was the one thing that freaked me out bad at first. Worrying if they would come apart etc. But when I talked with my doctor I think this is what I understand, Please let me know if this is right or just what I wanted to hear. Let me know your take on it. I think he said that the first 12 days is the crucial part. After 12 days your stomach is healed and the tissue is grown back together.

I guess my question is, is that what happens. The staples are just pretty much holding until the tissue of your stomach grows back together so that doesn't have to be a fear for life. So the tissue grows back and then your pretty much back to normal just with a smaller stomach. This makes me think of another question I keep wondering about. Sorry for all the questions. With the band I had to always be careful not to get stomach virus or to throw up for fear of slipping the band (which I did and had to have it repaired) Is this something you have to worry about with the sleeve. If I get a stomach virus or throw up is there going to always be a fear of tearing my stomach apart?