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Well, did you eat a sensible diet? If so, why not tell your doctor. Otherwise, he's just telling it like it is.

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That is why I don't like going to doctors in the first place. I went into the office, and he pretty much told me that the reason I gained all my weight back was all my fault. I cried so much as soon as I got out of there this afternoon. When he walked in and said hi, the first thing he said was, "Ok, you're back at your starting weight. Now, why do you think that is? Do you think it's because you haven't been following the diet at all? Do you eat ice cream and chips everyday?" I was floored. I had always thought of him as a nice person, but this was the rudest thing I've ever hear from ANYONE I've ever discussed my weight with. After that, he said he'd give me the revision, but then he said, "you know, I'm giving you this revision because the band doesn't really work for some people, and you're one of them, but if you keep stress eating you're not going to lose weight. Eating a whole bag of potato chips when you don't feel good is going to kill you." If that wasn't enough, he also said, "You have to look at what you're eating when you have bariatric surgery, you can't just eat everything you see."

I WAS SO ANGRY. Like, WHAT THE F**K. WHAT DO YOU THINK I'VE BEEN DOING FOR THE LAST F**KING YEAR AND A HALF??:mad0: JUST SITTING ON MY A** EATING ALL DAY? Ugh, I was so angry, and I still am. He made me feel so small - not the good kind, the ashamed kind. And why? I've done everything right for the last year and a half with this band and I'm RIGHT BACK WHERE I WAS. That's not MY fault, that's the BAND.:mad0: I said something about stress eating ONE TIME about 6 months ago when I was taking finals (I'm still in college) and now he's throwing it back in my face?? WTF.:confused:

He scheduled an appointment for me to get the revision, but he made it seem like he was doing me a huge favor even considering it. He's so rude. When he took me over to the nurses station he said, "Make sure we get her in a sleep study, at her weight we don't know what could happen." at HER WEIGHT? WTF. There are people who weigh 3 TIMES as much as I do that go to that SAME office. I only weigh 237 right now (the same as when I started with the lap band). But the reason I need surgery is because I'm only 5'5" and because of health problems. "Only" is a relative term, but there are people that weigh a LOT more than I do. This whole experience made me so angry.

I just want to get my sleeve done and never have to see any of those people ever again. My question is: how can you work at a bariatric surgery place and be so rude to people about their weight? wtf?

I think you should get someone else to do your surgery. I had an ass hole surgeon. Said some pretty shitty things to me. Wouldn't listen, etc. Well, I had adhesions under my band that had nearly closed my stomach off. He was so busy telling me it was all my fault that he wouldn't listen to me. I finally found Dr. Aceves who would take care of me as no one in the US would take over someone else's patient,especially as there were problems. I will be forever grateful to Dr. Aceves for basically saving my life when my US surgeon wouldn't listen.

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No way would I want to be in a position to have to use a doctor that talked to me this way. I pray you find a qualified surgeon that has a great track record of being sensitive but also is a good surgeon.

You can vote for him with your feet - by walking away.

Why would I give a crap if there are a lot of people in line waiting for him to do their surgery. That is absolutely not the point. The point is why do I want someone cutting on me that isn't totally on my team?

I'd be thankful for the warning and vote with my feet...walking out of his office and into another. At the end of the day...it matters.

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Whether you Dr. was right or wrong about the eating is something you'll have to think about because it is just a tool we have BUT he had NO right to make you feel bad about yourself, and he gets paid for that office visit today, I mean seriously.... Get mad and show the man what you're capable of with the sleeve.You can do it- the sleeve works or ...Fire his hiny.

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If he's that arrogant preop when he wants your cash, imagine how attentive he'll be postop once he has your money. Get a new surgeon.

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Awful. What a d*ck. I wouldn't go back to him in a million years. I don't care if he's a brilliant surgeon. There are other brilliant surgeons out there who will give you the respectful care you deserve. Tell him why you're leaving his practice, and write a letter to the CEO of the hospital. Also, out his name on this website and others (and tell him that you are doing that). Bad word of mouth is very effective and may do double duty of hurting his bottom line while saving others the unprofessional and demeaning behavior that you suffered. At least he'll think twice before opening his big insensitive mouth next time. Hang in there!

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My two cents.. I would not want someone operating on me that treated me so poorly. There are ways to support someone and share information without being an ass. If it really bothers you I would talk to him next time and tell him how you feel. It may not register, but you will feel better about it and I can guarantee if he talks to other people like that they are upset too.

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If he's that arrogant preop when he wants your cash, imagine how attentive he'll be postop once he has your money. Get a new surgeon.

wow... sometimes the most simple statements make the biggest impression. this is so true.

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Hi Sb,

It is not you I too am a lapband failure well not me but the lapband. Mine started leaking after about 9 months. I went from 287lbs. down to 260 lbs. that didn't count my presurgery weight loss i was 313 lbs. at start. My port actually rejected from my body and came out through the skin. So i had to get mine removed and due to scar tissue I had to wait to get my sleeve. I finally get it next week. That doc you have I would talk to your insurance company about him and see if they would let you change and drop his A_ _ like a hot potato. I gained 30 lbs back because of a faulty lapband and me liking to eat thats why I went the WLS route. So chin up, dump his A_ _ and get moving on the insurance company but ask the insurance company what they would recommend.... Oh and put the crying act on hard it always works. Hope everything turns out for you. :thumbup:

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Wow, I just read your experience w/this guy. I haven't the replies yet because I had to speed and scroll down so I could write you something.

His behavior was UNCALLED for, UNWARRANTED, UNBELIEVABLY rude, and 'just WRONG'.

Switch to another Dr. .....now. Period. And complain to the group he's associated with.

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Sumthing - beyond uncool re: both posts.

Yes there are plenty of obese people in this country to operate on; however, a doctor can have a successful practice or just an OK practice. I like Mi-Mi's idea about writing a letter. I did the exact same thing to my band surgeon regarding his surgical assistant. She was very rude and, at my age, I'm tired of putting up with people's crap. I don't care how many degrees one has; speaking down to people like SB was today is just disgusting and uncalled for. I have NEVER have anyone speak to me the way SB's surgeon did to her....not even some schmuck walking down the street.

Every service provider is replaceable. SB, if you have the time and the patience for it, I am with those that voted for a new surgeon. I'm sure that the DFW are is big enough to have more than one. Good luck to you!!!!!

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I know I am going to get flamed for this but it really didnt sound out of the ordinary for a doctor to say such things. I dont want my doc mollycoddling me. He should be direct and when I am not meeting my health needs he SHOULD step in. If he doesnt, who will? I wish you the best of luck. This is a struggle and I know it all too well. But, before I had this surgery, and I am only a month out, I did the 6 mths 'diet' with dr supervision. Yea, the doc asked/said these same things to me and the answer was , yea, I am cheating and screwing around. That's why I need this surgery. I cant do it in my own.

If you cant be honest with your situation and not doing as the doc says, then it wont work. I didnt do the band specifically because I knew I could cheat it. You have to have the mindset that this is life altering surgery that you cant go back on. If I ever get back up to my original weight, I hope I have a doctor like yours that will slap my in the head. Only by having this surgery, have I finally focused on eating just to get nutrients in and avoiding comfort food. I could load up on ice cream but now I know if I eat that ice cream, I wont be getting my Protein in for the day. And, if I eat that ice cream I will gain weight. Before, wouldnt have cared as I could eat something else later.

I would focus less on how he says things, more on what he says, and verify he is a great surgeon. Because if you get this surgery, its his skills you are paying for, not his bedside manner. Maybe you have options but I would want the meanest surgeon around if he was the most skillful before a sweet nice bedside manner that I found out was just an ok surgeon. You wont see your surgeon much more afterwards!

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What you are willing to tolerate is certainly a matter of personal choice. When I choose a doctor, I expect someone with medical knowledge, technical expertise, a competent staff, and the ability to conduct him/herself in a professional manner. There are plenty of skilled surgeons who meet those requirements and who have the ability to be honest/direct with their patients without resorting to bullying and verbal abuse. I am of the strong opinion that people who batter others--whether it's with their fists or their mouths--should not be enabled. Why would anyone pay to be treated disrespectfully?

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