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20 years old, never had a boyfriend.



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I get butterflies in my stomach just thinking about YOU both having your first kiss. What an NSV (nonscale victory) that will be!

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Im sorry your in this situation. I think we have all have gone through a period of loneliness one way or another. This isnt only about weight loss or what you look like. Its about who you are. Ive been in your shoes before... but after being single after a 12 year relationship, I found myself.. I found what makes me tick and also found the woman in me way before surgery. As long as you take the time to really love the very person that you are today, you will see doors open for you. We arent guaranteed to see tomorrow so weather I lose to my goal weight or never lose again, the one thing I have learned is to love yourself even if it meant the bigger me. People will start to see who you truely are and you wont be looking for happiness in someone else but you will already have it cause its in you.

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I'm feeling for you girl. Its good to keep in mind that when a man jumps on your body, it doesn't necessarily mean that he loves the real you. Keep it cool, and take your time. Its not a crime to not have a boyfriend at 20. Enjoy your life, keep laughing and having a good time. Take the time to get to know those men in your life for who they truly are too...Some men just are not attracted to big girls, thats true, but many are as well. You deserve men in your life that have good character, and will take good care of you! You don't want to end up with someone just because you are hot! Take care, don't be in a big hurry. I like the idea of checking out self help books... Some of them are really helpful. I did a lot of work on myself before I started having healthy relationships with men.

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I'm almost 27. I've been on 3 dates in my life. I've never had a boyfriend. I'm so excited to lose weight and date!!! Im excited to be more confident and I know it will happen for us someday :)

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Take Your time when you date. Get to know the person. Dont focus on looks because looks dont mean anything at all. Focus on the heart. If they have a good heart then thats a big plus.

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I completely relate with you. I am 22 years old, never had a boyfriend. I've had guys in my life interested in me though but could never follow though. I would always tell my girlfriends I was just "picky" buy really I was just ashamed of myself and my body and had no self esteem or confidence. Big mistake on my part, I never let myself be happy. I am soon to be sleeved and I can't wait to actually be myself around guys and let go of my insecurities.

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    • Bashbee91

      Hey guys new to the process looking forward to this new life. 
      · 0 replies
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    • Bugg

      Hi everyone! I’m brand new here. I just went through all my pre-op requirements per my insurance company and now everything has been submitted and I’m just waiting for final approval and my surgery date. I’ve been doing research, watching YouTube videos, TikTok’s, ect.. trying to prepare my mind and what to expect so I’ll be ready for the surgery. I was so sure and so set and so ready and excited. However, now that I’ve done everything & it’s almost here, I am sooooooo scared! I know why I want it bc I’ve tried everything and I just don’t feel like I can lose weight by myself. I’m tired of being overweight my entire life. I’m miserable, but I keep psyching myself out afraid of GERD bc I know how that can be and I don’t want to have to get a bypass after already gaining the courage to even get VSG. I’m scared of complications like I’mgoing to regret doing it and be depressed that I didn’t just be more disciplined and try again to lose the weight on my own even sitting here typing this knowing in my mind i just can’t and don’t possess the discipline. I’m also afraid I won’t be able to handle the restrictions of the sleeve. What do I eat? I don’t know how to eat healthy really and don’t enjoy healthy food. I don’t know how to do this! I feel so defeated!Someone tell me they felt anything similar to this or am I not ready? I thought I was. I am so tired of being sick and tired and so tired of myself and so tired of being stuck and stuck in this body and somebody different on the outside from what I feel inside. I just want to ball up and cry.
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    • buildabetteranna

      over 20 lbs down since4 the pre surgery diet and surgery on the 14th
      · 1 reply
      1. Selina333

        Yay!! Congrats. I know how good that feels. 🤩

    • Jenopolis

      Had a sleeve in 2017, lost over 100 pounds. Had a DS surgery this year (2025) for more sustainable weight loss. 🤞
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    • buildabetteranna

      The 14th was my day. I am home and recovery is going pretty smooth. They even let me walk out of the hospital. Picture of me in recovery curtesy of my boyfriend lol. 

      · 3 replies
      1. DaisyChainOz

        Glad it went well!! Wishing you a speedy recovery and wonderful success!! 🤗

      2. buildabetteranna

        Thank you ❤️

      3. Selina333

        Neat you have a pic of this day! I was sooo happy to get my surgery. It was well worth it! And I'm not even near my goal. I had surgery Dec. 2!

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