Struggling with making changes...

[Jenn100 1]

I had my surgery 6 months ago and have lost 78lbs. That alone I know is great. I should feel more excited and motivated. I should be feeling very happy...but I do not feel that way. I seem to have to be having more bad days than good. I am afraid that I stretched my sleeve..cause I seem to be able to take in more food. I am terrible at counting Protein..calories..I dont. When it comes to keeping myself organized its impossible.

I dont really have a support system I can turn too on a daily basis. My husband who struggles with his weight and is not willing to make changes to his lifestyle ...this does not help me ....difficult when he brings all the goodies that I use to love eating...I dont know how to help him or motivate him if I can't help myself....I hope it does not sound like I am wallowing in selfpity..I am having a hard time turing the other cheek from making bad choices. I dont know what to do. I did try attending a weight loss group for people who have gone through surgery. I found it very clicky..

We have a busy housewhole with our children involved in activities..a lot of running around. Meals are quick and not very healthy.

I feel unhappy most of the time...no motivation to do anything physical...I am so afraid I fail myself once again.

Any suggestions?

[deletedsally 8]

Hi Jenn,

It sounds like you are feeling pretty overwhelmed with the responsibilities of taking care of children and having a busy lifestyle. It's almost always hard to find the time to take good care of yourself when you are busy taking care of everyone else in the family--and it becomes even more complicated when your partner is sabotaging your success by bringing unhealthy foods into the home.

My children are older, but I babysit for my grandchildren (2 & 4), and it seems like the things that I need to do for myself always get put aside on the days that I have them...Maybe I don't have time to take a shower until bedtime...or there's no time to exercise...or I forget to drink my fluids because I'm so busy chasing them and cleaning up messes...I definitely can't take the time to record my food...

My experience is that everything that you can do to simplify your life will help. You can't change your husband...but sometimes talking to a counselor can help when our spouse are unsupportive. It might not change your circumstances, but it might help you get to the root causes of feeling unhappy, and begin to make changes that you would feel good about!

Hope you start feeling better soon!

[Jachut 487]

Well, it sounds like we live a similar lifestyle when it comes to running children around.

I worked very hard since my WLS to NOT diet every again. I didnt (and dont) count anything. I just make good food choices. I dont eat a lot at a sitting, like being afraid to stretch a sleeve, I want to take very good care of my band (and pouch).

I make exercise a priority.Its MY thing. Its the best stress relief and over the years I've come to love getting away from household responsibility for a while. I put on my shoes and head out the door.

But for me, I feel it was really key not to have anymore eating rules ever again. It puts the pressure on, simply swaps one bad way of eating for another (in my humble opinion) when you need to be learning to listen to your body and just get on with being "normal".

Organisation is key however, I find I really really need to have shopped well and thought about dinners and such for the coming week. I always have stuff cooked and in the freezer for the couple of nights a week when i just cant cook from scratch. We eat frozen vegies, even frozen potato and such to make mashed potato, I take every HEALTHY shortcut I can - I wouldnt feed my family pre prepared meals full of salt and additives, but why peel and chop potatoes if you dont have to? Why cut up vegies, when you throw a steam pouch in the microwave. It really is very quick and simple to eat healthy.

[pumpkin07 32]

I think you shouldn't assume your sadness is due to the weight loss surgery or your diet, because you have been a huge success. Your weight loss in 6 mos. is phenomenal. How much more do you have to lose?

I think WLS can change your sleep apnea, your cholesterol, etc. etc. But I don't think it will remake your mental or spiritual life. You might have some issues such as depression that is unrelated to the weight loss is what I'm saying.

I say this b/c you've been a huge success and are downing yourself. It makes no sense logically why you would consider 78 lbs in 6 mos. a failure. Maybe you are eating incorrectly, but you've still done great. The one thing is if you are eating empty calories then sometimes you can eat more volume so it might make it seem as if your sleeve stretched. However, if you eat dense Protein how much can you get down?