redroses47 1 Posted June 28, 2010 This is an interesting thread that I just came across. If I may put my two cents in ... A number of you have noted potential sabotage or negative remarks from people that you love and I myself wonder about this in my own dynamic. I am divorced from a man who loved thicker women. Today, I still see him occasionally and he is now noticing my weight loss and he is making slight derogatory comments which tells me my weight loss would have been an eventual issue. My second serious relationship (which has ended) was also with a man who loved thicker women. I can say without a doubt he would not have liked my weight loss. Both men were in very good physical shape, big eaters and social drinkers. It was a part of both relationships and like noted above, I would have changed the dynamic with my surgery. I am somebody who was never ashamed of myself or my weight .. I am confident .. yet when I read your stories, I am sure there is someone else lurking in my life that will have an issue with my weight loss and that will be my brother. I am already seeing it *sighs*. I will not allow anyone to derail me, so in a way, I am glad I am single. I am all for relationships but I think for me, the timing of my surgery was perfect and I will be spending the next year looking after myself. I'm sorry to read of other's struggles with loved ones but I am glad you shared your stories. It allows me to learn what others are going through. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Globetrotter 1,340 Posted June 28, 2010 I don't know what issues I may or may not have with a romantic partner and how much I eat because I haven't been sleeved yet. However, I do already have some anxiety about reactions to the changes in me. Whenever I have managed to lose weight before in my life, my female friends have been ... less than supportive, shall we say. In fact, I never had straight female friends until I became obese. Until I took myself out of competition women were regularly cruel to me, I have to prepare myself for the possibility of the same happening again. Maybe women in their late 20s and early 30s won't be as cruel as women in their early 20s were. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
redroses47 1 Posted June 28, 2010 I don't know what issues I may or may not have with a romantic partner and how much I eat because I haven't been sleeved yet. However, I do already have some anxiety about reactions to the changes in me. Whenever I have managed to lose weight before in my life, my female friends have been ... less than supportive, shall we say. In fact, I never had straight female friends until I became obese. Until I took myself out of competition women were regularly cruel to me, I have to prepare myself for the possibility of the same happening again. Maybe women in their late 20s and early 30s won't be as cruel as women in their early 20s were. Interesting thought about women friends .. this has crossed my mind, too. We shall see. When is your surgery scheduled for? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Globetrotter 1,340 Posted June 29, 2010 Blue - Actually I just got my surgery date confirmed an hour ago, July 14th, eeeepp!!! I have a wierd job that keeps me in a sort of cocoon from regular life and society, I'm hoping I can use the 5 months after surgery to mentally adjust to the new me, to help me be prepared when I do go back to regular life in the States. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
redroses47 1 Posted June 29, 2010 Congrats on the date! Keep us posted on everything Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jane_J 117 Posted June 29, 2010 Blue - Actually I just got my surgery date confirmed an hour ago, July 14th, eeeepp!!! I have a wierd job that keeps me in a sort of cocoon from regular life and society, I'm hoping I can use the 5 months after surgery to mentally adjust to the new me, to help me be prepared when I do go back to regular life in the States. Congrats globie!! Where are you getting it done? jane x Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Globetrotter 1,340 Posted June 30, 2010 Thanks guys! :thumbup1: I am having it done with Dr. Jossart at LapSF in San Francisco. I just got my pre-op packet this morning and jaysus! it's huge! I had no idea it would be so convoluted, I guess I was living in a fool's paradise that I would just pay have a few tests done and be ready for surgery - ha! Medical power of attorney, pre-registration by phone - which is made 100x more difficult by the fact that I'm on the other side of the world without easy access to a regular phone. Then I still have to have all the tests ekgs etc done in the days prior to surgery, so I have to manoeuver my flight itinerary, ack!!!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jane_J 117 Posted July 3, 2010 Sounds like quite a logistical nightmare but it will be worth it. All the very best wishes to you. Jane x Share this post Link to post Share on other sites