Feeling down....

[SarahRN 0]

I am scheduled for my sleeve on the 18th of Feb, I have since noticed that my determination and rigourious acitvity of watching what I eat has come to a total hault. I don't want anyone to scorn me either, being a nurse I know what's right and wrong. So I am feeling insecure...and of all FAT. I hate the feeling of being fat

Noone can understand how it feels, unless they have walked the path...my clothes are tight and I feel inadequate and unattractive right now, I don't see the sleeve as a simple fix at all. I am just having a rough time right now...maybe I am just stressed out. Is this normal? Will my feelings of being unattractive and insecure resolve once I lose weight and get on track for a normal, healthy life? I can't be the only person who has felt this way!

:frown1:Sarah:frown1:

[Lee 19]

Hi Sarah,

I wanted to come give you a hug. How you're feeling sounds completely reasonable to me. I don't know how we'll feel afterwards, because my Sleeve is 10 days before yours. I do know that when I'm eating poorly, I feel really unattractive. I'm so tired of yoyo dieting. I know that once the weight starts coming off and I want to move and exercise more, I'll feel better about myself and have more self-confidence.

We're not having this surgery because of great eating habits. It's not surprising to want to slip back into old habits as surgery gets closer. All of this is a scary process, regardless of how exciting. I have to be at my pre-surgery goal weight on the 8th or they'll cancel my surgery and send me home. For me that's a great incentive to just keep eating healthy.

Keep posting about how you're feeling. I know everyone can relate.

[MidwestGirl 8]

Hi Sarah. Sorry to see that you're feeling this way. Just know we've all been there! I'm glad you posted this. I would say sure, your feelings are completely normal. However, I think it would be wrong to assume that the insecurity issues might go away with the surgery. For me personally, I'm only 3 1/2 weeks out and I feel much more attractive and more secure with myself. But I don't necessarily think everyone feels that way. It's definitely separate from the eating if that makes sense. The psychological change is much more difficult, but you will make it through it! :smile: I think that insecurities are something we all have to work through on our own because it's a head thing, not a physical thing. So the insecurity doesn't necessarily relate completely to the weightloss. I know I'm probably still gonna have bad days, but hopefully the good days will start outweighing the bad. And so far, things are much better. Good luck, lady!!!

[mountain_lover 3]

I am scheduled for my sleeve on the 18th of Feb, I have since noticed that my determination and rigourious acitvity of watching what I eat has come to a total hault. I don't want anyone to scorn me either, being a nurse I know what's right and wrong. So I am feeling insecure...and of all FAT. I hate the feeling of being fat :smile:

Noone can understand how it feels, unless they have walked the path...my clothes are tight and I feel inadequate and unattractive right now, I don't see the sleeve as a simple fix at all. I am just having a rough time right now...maybe I am just stressed out. Is this normal? Will my feelings of being unattractive and insecure resolve once I lose weight and get on track for a normal, healthy life? I can't be the only person who has felt this way!

:frown1:Sarah:frown1:

Hello Sarah, I am very happy to know that you came on here to talk to us, this forum has been a great help to me and I hope that you will get the help that you need at this time. I had the sleeve done on Dec. 2. and you took me back to a time when I felt so much as you do. The closer that I got to my surgery date, the more nervous, anxious, excited, fearful of a painful surgery and worried about so many things. I was real glad when I read others comments on here to know that I was not alone with similar feelings. It helped me to stay positive until the surgery date, no matter what I was thinking or feeling at that moment.

I started my weigh-ins in Feb. last year and I weighed in at 257, the highest that I had ever weighed in years. I already had a total knee replacement the year before my first weigh-in. I had been walking with a cane and having to be helped up from chairs. I had gotten rid of all my size 24 jeans and at 257 pounds all my size 22 jeans were getting so tight again and I was feeling so miserable. I started losing weight, but after a few weigh-ins I started to gain weight, and by July my weight was up to 266. I am so thankful to God and all the people on this forum, because I read on here about how others sometimes experienced the same thing. One explaination is that some go through thinking about being deprived of food after surgery, so some eat more and more. Anyway that is how I understood their explaination. food depravation, just the thought of it can really be very emotional.

I am happy to say that I do not feel deprived of food now after surgery. I do not feel hungry like I did before surgery. I am thankful that the surgery helps with getting rid of some of the hunger hormone which is called Ghrellin. Also I get full very quick so I have to stop eating, because eating too much makes me feel very uncomfortable and I almost vomit if I don't stop when I should.

I also started dreading going through the surgery very close to my surgery date, because I was dreading the anticipation of all the pain that I thought I would experience after surgery. I got on the forum and read more and more about some of the sleevers having good recoveries, returning to work early, wanting to get back to exercising, others not experiencing much pain after surgery and many other positive comments.

After surgery the only pain I experienced was gas pains and some nausea. I was able to go back to swim exercise classes 2-3 weeks afterwards. I had to wait until the incision healed up completely. I know the inside takes longer to heal, but I did not experience any pain.

I hope that you find the help that you need on this forum to get you through this feeling down time. I have no regrets having this surgery done. From July until Dec.1 before surgery I lost 34 pounds. After surgery since Dec.2 I have lost 28 pounds. I can now cross my legs, get into 16 M jeans, get up and down without someone helping me up, get comments from others about how good I am looking since losing weight, and I am not feeling so down on myself all the time like before surgery.

Hang in there and stay positive and before you know it your day will be here and then you will be on your way to a new you. I wish you all the best!!

[SarahRN 0]

Thank you so much Mountain_lover, Midwestgirl, and Bella. Your words were so helpful and words of wisdom...sometimes that's all we need. I am nervous and getting scared as the date approaches closer. I know I am making the right choice, it's just a lot to take in sometimes. My husband isn't as easy to talk to because his response is and always will be "your beautiful the way you are". I know it is silly but I didn't want to be judged by my post, being seen as a fat a** or something (I know that sounds awful). Thanks for the support...I really appreciate it!

<3 Sarah

[Lee 19]

Sarah,

I am scheduled 10 days before you. I've been feeling pretty overwhelmed the last few days as I finished my appointments, classes and met my weight goal. Once I got my date I really did a mini-meltdown of emotions. It just felt like too much at once. Now that I've had a good night sleep, the anxiety has dissipated and I know it's the right decision. I feel like I can't go into this with any doubts because I need to pour all of the positive, healing energy into this for myself.

We can do this together!

[bkind 1]

Sarah,

I am scheduled 10 days before you. I've been feeling pretty overwhelmed the last few days as I finished my appointments, classes and met my weight goal. Once I got my date I really did a mini-meltdown of emotions. It just felt like too much at once. Now that I've had a good night sleep, the anxiety has dissipated and I know it's the right decision. I feel like I can't go into this with any doubts because I need to pour all of the positive, healing energy into this for myself.

We can do this together!

I understand completely what you're feeling.. You are not alone it gets overwhelming sometimes... Just know this will be a great journey of strength and endurance!!! At least we're making the decision for health and happiness and I don't know about y'all but it's been dang hard being fat and unhealthy! It's our time...and each day draws us closer to self acceptance and self love...I've been missing that for a very long time!!!