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[Katydid 0]

Hello,

I'm in Perth Western Australia so it's a bit hard to talk in the chat room because of the time difference but I'm learning a lot from everyones postings.

I found this site through the LapBandTalk. I've had two, yes, two failed lapbands and the last one in March 2009 was a life/death situation. I've also had 6 large abdominal hernias since being banded the first time. Won't bore you all with the details.

I had gone from a size 22-24 top down to a 14 and a size 18 pant to a 12 not at goal weight but really feeling happy about the weight loss. The only thing I didn't like was that I'd never had wrinkles before because the fat filled them all out, so that was a bit of a downer.

After things went pair shaped again and the band removed, the weight started back again and pretty soon my new clothes started to strain at the seams, which brought back the old depression, which made me eat more and so the cycle began again.

I'd given all my Big clothes away to a homeless appeal and am now scratching for something to wear. I found one blouse that I'd somehow missed giving away, which is now my everyday "wash and wear" because I can't bear to go and buy Big sizes at the moment.

My new surgeon says he'll see me at the end of January to discuss the sleeve as he's "not brave enough to operate on me just yet because of all the damage to my stomach". I guess I just have to wait but I hate to think of the size I'll be then.

My daughters says "Oh mum, you should get into exercise, diet, be positive etc".... "Been there, done that. If that had brought me the willpower and results I wouldn't have had to resort to all the operations, so your mother is a failure and a bad example!" Well, I can't wear that negative talk anymore so I'm counting on you folks to help me out here.

Best wishes, Katydid.

[*susan* 1,709]

Hi Katydid, and welcome to our forums. I am sorry you had so much trouble with the band. There are just some of us that seemed destined to have problems with it. I am also a band to sleeve revision and the difference is night and day. I am so much happier with the sleeve.

You are not a failure. food is just as much an addiction as alcohol and drugs are. The difference is, we can't just quit eating. Until someone has actually walked in our shoes, it is difficult for them to understand how hard it is to commit to exercise and diet. Many of us need help, such as weight loss surgery. If it were as easy as some make it out to be, then there would be no obese people in this world.

We are all here to support one another. You will find we are more a big family here than anything. And we are here for you whenever you need us.

[Malaika 50]

Hi Katydid and welcome to the VST family. I am sorry for all the problems you have had from the band. I also understand the circle of depression -- I went through that for many years. Keep in mind that the more weight you gain, the more weight you will have to lose when you are finally able to have your sleeve -- try and maintain the weight you're at now, even though it's not where you want to be - or even try losing some if that's possible. You want to be in the best shape you can be in for your surgery in January, which is RIGHT around the corner when you think about it - so set small goals for yourself everyday - and only talk POSITIVE... NO NEGATIVE THOUGHTS/SPOKEN WORDS allowed. You are not a failure -- tell yourself I CAN DO THIS - I WILL DO THIS ... POSTIVE AFFIRMATIONS WORK!

Stay positive, hang with us here for reinforcement and support, and January will be here before you know it!

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

Katy, I am glad to see you posting. I hope you are able to get your sleeve surgery like you want. Tiffy had some problems with her stomach from the band and she has been very successful with the sleeve.

[Katydid 0]

Hi Everyone,

Thank you all for your friendly welcoming and positive thoughts and advice. I will certainly try. It's a bit hard to stay positive at the moment, as I was told by my bone surgeon that it looks as though I'll have to have my shoulder reconstructed AGAIN. It was done approx 8-9 weeks ago but I've since hurt it again by being stupidly stubborn and not wearing my brace.

As the weight is coming back with a vengence, I have only one blouse in the smallest of the bigger sizes I used to wear after giving everything away, thinking I'd never need them again. I spent hours yesterday trying to find something decent to wear for a change and hating having to go to the big sizes and especially having to go up another size again. I eventually found one but I came home totally depressed. Don't you find the shop fitting room mirrors the worst of all mirrors. It is so deflating to see the fat from all angles at once.

Best wishes to all, Katydid.