when do others notice?

[shanda7182 5]

Men are so funny! They don't know you even exist when we are overweight, but boy oh boy lose a few pounds and you instantly become a hot momma! hehehe . . . like i said in another post, men get all weird and odd when they don't know how to handle a situation! Gosh. . . Shanda, I read your post to my hubbie and he found it so cute. . . he said "yeah whats wrong with these men now a days!"

Yep, these men are interesting creatures aren't they! The funny thing is I dont care for that kind of attention @ all. Some women like it, I just want to think that im HOT! LOL Maybe subconsciously, I feel hot and dont know it hence the extra attention. LOL

Im glad your hubby realizes that these men are a trip, LOL:lol0:

[Malaika 50]

congrats Shanda - what's your fiance have to say? Is he making all types of comments about how good you're looking? Bearded is my biggest support and then my friend Sandy -- they really help to keep my self-esteem up! Keep up the good work and just keep on walking by all those guys and looking hot - give those hips a swing and really make them drool .... LOL

[*susan* 1,709]

I think Shanda made a good point about the confidence angle as well. Before surgery, we tend to try and be as invisible as possible to others. We feel fat, we feel like we are unattractive and we prefer no one notice us as opposed to someone noticing us and making an embarrassing comment. After we have the surgery, and we see the numbers on the scale getting smaller, we start feeling better about ourselves. The people we are around start commenting on the differences, which make us feel even better. Pretty soon, we start feeling more confident about ourselves and it shows, to everyone. That is why men start noticing us. We are not trying to be invisible anymore. And, I do believe that many men like a confident woman and are able to see past our weight. Confidence in itself can be a very beautiful thing.

[Chancie 65]

Yep- I tend to agree with the confidance.... I think I always had confidance, but it has increase as the weight went down.

Mountain-lover-

I have looked into this, I am still so early out that I need to make goal before I procede with this. If the insurance will pay for the Panicules surgery, that will cover the hospilzation and I can pay for the tummytuck... I'm already saving for this:wink0:

Actually- I'm saving for a lower body lift... but am I too old?? should I just forget it? I think I really want it done, but then I think about my age- wish I had the WLS 10 years ago!

[shanda7182 5]

congrats Shanda - what's your fiance have to say? Is he making all types of comments about how good you're looking? Bearded is my biggest support and then my friend Sandy -- they really help to keep my self-esteem up! Keep up the good work and just keep on walking by all those guys and looking hot - give those hips a swing and really make them drool .... LOL

Yes, Vegas, he is enjoying the changes, of course he liked me how I was before he continues to state, which is refreshing! Its glad to know that someone accepts you how you are regardless.

Question for all: Have you all found that you are more social and want to participate in more activities since you have started loosing weight? I find that I am ready to go to all the get togethers as possible, why, I really dont know why. I mean I was social before but not as social as I am becoming. I really like that though, I dont feel as if im ashamed of the way I look or something like that you know. Of course, im no where NEAR where I want to be but its a nice change!

[Tiffykins 673]

Yes, Vegas, he is enjoying the changes, of course he liked me how I was before he continues to state, which is refreshing! Its glad to know that someone accepts you how you are regardless.

Question for all: Have you all found that you are more social and want to participate in more activities since you have started loosing weight? I find that I am ready to go to all the get togethers as possible, why, I really dont know why. I mean I was social before but not as social as I am becoming. I really like that though, I dont feel as if im ashamed of the way I look or something like that you know. Of course, im no where NEAR where I want to be but its a nice change!

I'm going through the same thing. I have always been extremely extroverted, and social. But, now I want to go out and see and do more things.

I'll say this, and some will think it's absolutely horrible to think/say, but, I now enjoy not being the "fattest" person in the room. Before, I was the fattest person in the room abut 99% of the time. I carried my weight really well, I have always been told that I have an approachable, and magnetic personality, but now, it seems that I'm just more "out there".

And, I'll admit, I love all the attention men are giving me. I got hit on at my highest weight, but now it's even more. John and I went on base the other day. He caught a guy checking me out, and he slapped his arm around my waist and kissed my forehead. I giggled, and told him to stop being territorial. I felt like he was going to hike his leg on my thigh. A couple of weeks before John got home, a guy waved and winked at me, Caysen decided right then and there that "no other man can think my mommy is pretty other than my daddy." I told him that men and women can find someone pretty/handsome even if they are married to someone else. We just don't go out with other people.

I agree with the confidence factor. I was always confident regardless of my pant size, but now, I feel "free". I'm not constantly tugging at my clothes, or trying to "hide" certain things about my body. It's very liberating, and truly a blessing that I have been so successful thus far.

Edited October 19, 2009 by Tiffykins

[DownInSocal 12]

Tiffy you were a knockout before surgery. John is going to be continuing to beat them off with a stick. In fact he might need to buy a bigger one.

[DownInSocal 12]

Yes, Vegas, he is enjoying the changes, of course he liked me how I was before he continues to state, which is refreshing! Its glad to know that someone accepts you how you are regardless.

Question for all: Have you all found that you are more social and want to participate in more activities since you have started loosing weight? I find that I am ready to go to all the get togethers as possible, why, I really dont know why. I mean I was social before but not as social as I am becoming. I really like that though, I dont feel as if im ashamed of the way I look or something like that you know. Of course, im no where NEAR where I want to be but its a nice change!

I don't think I am more social but I like not feeling like I am the fattest person in the room or that everyone is staring at me.

I never thought this surgery would effect me in so many ways and never dreamed it would change the dynamics in my marriage. It has though. We are kind of going through a sudden rough patch. The reasons are many but it all relates in someway back to surgery. It is one of the reasons i have not been around much. Anway I am not going to air it on the board but it does have far reaching impacts even a careful planner didn't see coming.

It is all good though. I love the new me. I wouldn't trade her for anything.

[kromrider 3]

I think the people that know I have had the surgery see my weight loss but do not say anything, almost like i am cheating by having surgery. Like a baseball player who is on steroids. Its a weird thing. My wife definitely notices and my daughter can get her hands to touch when she hugs me. most importantly i can see it!

[shanda7182 5]

I think the people that know I have had the surgery see my weight loss but do not say anything, almost like i am cheating by having surgery. Like a baseball player who is on steroids. Its a weird thing. My wife definitely notices and my daughter can get her hands to touch when she hugs me. most importantly i can see it!

Hi Kromrider, You are doing great! You are making your tool work for you! Youll be at goal in no time!:confused1:

[Gingin33 2]

I haven't had the wls yet but I have lost weight in the past (many times!). I notice that when I lose enough weight that men start to "check me out", it makes me feel a bit uncomfortable. In fact, I dont like it at all. Being fat is my shield. It keeps me safe from leers and unwanted attention. I dont know, maybe its a lack of self esteem. I just worry about that in the future (when I do have wls) about how I will deal with the attention I might receive.

[Bob_350lbs 105]

Tiffy, you have always had the attention, cause your just one of those people with a magnetic personality and you were always gorgeous. Lucky girl!

Edited October 30, 2009 by Steph_123

[DownInSocal 12]

People are noticing now. I don't just mean people I know. The people I know could not believe how I looked after two weeks of not seeing me. I lost a lot in the first two weeks.

I say people I don't know notice now because guys look. I had some dude walk past me as I was coming out of Starbucks and he was like "Hey baby you looking good, what is your name?" I turned around because I wanted to see the hottie he must be talking to and it was me! :ohmy: I didn't know what to say so I just turned around and walked to my car. My husband I had a good laugh about it.

I thought of the board and this post after something that happened this morning.

I have had a family member in the hospital so I look like death warmed over this morning. My hair was a mess, makeup smeared, huge bags under my eyes from no sleep and even less food. What a mess I was earlier. Anyway I was in my neighborhood and decided to get a Viviano for the Protein. The same guy that picked up on me above saw me again. He said "Why do you always walk past me but won't say hi girl?". I was like huh? :thumbup1: He said "I see you in the mornings often and have tried to talk to you but you just keep walking. I just want to know your name." I was shocked. I just muttered thanks but I am married and went to my car.

Ahh how nice to have admirers again. It has been so long :biggrin0:.

[Chancie 65]

Social- Thats a great story!! I love it!

[Malaika 50]

I haven't had the wls yet but I have lost weight in the past (many times!). I notice that when I lose enough weight that men start to "check me out", it makes me feel a bit uncomfortable. In fact, I dont like it at all. Being fat is my shield. It keeps me safe from leers and unwanted attention. I dont know, maybe its a lack of self esteem. I just worry about that in the future (when I do have wls) about how I will deal with the attention I might receive.

I would seek counseling on this issue as it's going to happen and with the sleeve you will have a hard time to gain the weight back - but why would you want to - find the reason for the fact that you're uncomfortable NOW so that when it happens, you'll be prepared. Maybe Norma can help you-she's having her surgery today I think, so it might be a bit before she posts. You could always PM here.