Forum Rules and Guidelines

[Penni60 45]

1. I have along with the other moderators been watching all the threads that have "bashing" in them.

2. Moderators do not play favorites as was implied.

3. We take each incidence and see just where the problems lie based on the rules and guidelines we ALL agreed to when we joined.

4. After careful review of reported threads if there is not a specific person's name mentioned or singled out for attack then we can only offer a gentle reminder of the rules and guidelines. IF you can show a specific person's name mentioned where they were attacked to the moderators then we will in fact deal with it.

5. The fact we are having to use our moderator skills so much lately saddens me greatly. It means that some cannot let things just die on their own and therefore moderators must step in an do our jobs.

6. Here is a gentle reminder of the rules and guidelines we all agreed to when we all became members.

LAST, All topics of bashing, mob mentality, cliques, etc should NOT be discussed in my humble opinion in a public forum. Those discussions should be taken to the PRIVATE MESSAGES which is just that PRIVATE.

I hope this has helped allay some of your concerns about how moderators handle things.

Forum Rules

Although the administrators and moderators of LapBandTalk.com - Lap Band Talk Forum will attempt to keep all objectionable messages off this forum, it is impossible for us to review all messages. All messages express the views of the author, and neither the owners of LapBandTalk.com - Lap Band Talk Forum will be held responsible for the content of any message.

By agreeing to these rules, you warrant that you will not post any messages that are hateful, threatening, or otherwise violative of any laws.

The owners of LapBandTalk.com - Lap Band Talk Forum reserve the right to remove, edit, move or close any thread for any reason.

Posting Guidelines

1. Don't report other people's experiences as truth. Share your own experiences, thoughts, opinions, theories at will.

2. Attack the idea, not the person. Basic online etiquette.

3. When posting, please show respect. We all deserve it.

4. Please take the really personal discussions to PM or e-mail.

5. Moderators will take a hands-off approach in general. The owners of LapBandTalk.com - Lap Band Talk Forum reserve the right to remove, edit, move or close any thread for any reason.

6. If you have a concern about a post, alert the moderators by using the Report Bad Post button. It's at the top of every post (the exclamation point in the triangle)

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A note on marketing:

Direct marketing or selling is forbidden on LBT. Members may include a single link in their signatures to a website of their choice, with no more than one line of explanation in addition. This signature text is not to exceed the default point size of forum posts (size=2).

Recommendations or reviews of physicians, facilities, products, or services are welcome if based on the reviewer's personal experience. The reviewer must have no financial interest in the subject being reviewed. Violations will result in the posts being removed.

Threads not related to banding surgery or weight loss in general should be placed in the LapBandTalk Lounge, and may be moved if necessary.

[Penni60 45]

bump bump,...

[dawg 0]

Can I ask when is it time to delete a thread?

Because a post where PhotoNut was called a "f**king c**t" is still very much present, and the person has gone without reproach other than the thread being locked.

When does a person get publicly rebuked? I've seen people be rebuked for the mildest of things, and I've seen the most egregious things go by without a word other than "this is locked".

Help me understand please?

[Penni60 45]

Excuse me but how precisely do you know that the person wasn't rebuked for the name calling? There are some things that moderators think should be handled in private with the actual person in question. We chose to handle our issues with the actual person instead of airing it publicly.

Are you suggesting Moderators should apologize for someone else's transgressions?

Are you suggesting Moderators play favorites? If so then contact Alex the owner of this board and let him know and he can take the appropriate actions.

Just what do you want from Moderators? That is the better question. We are only here to keep things calm as much as the members allows us to do that. We cannot tell you what to write or what to say all we can do it moderate based on the guidelines set up. If you want the Moderators to have more power then contact the owner Alex.

Enough said.

[TommyO 5]

The words in the post that Dawg speaks of are crude rude and disgusting. The threatening nature of that post is beyond any acceptable behavior.

The person who made that post should be denied access to this site

[dawg 0]

Actually, I said that the mildest thing has been publically rebuked, and the most serious items aren't.

Example. Some time ago a thread occured where someone said that they weren't happy and were thinking about leaving. When a response was made of "if being here makes you unhappy, then leave" the responder was blasted by moderators.

My main question was - when is it time to delete a thread? Surely leaving vicious slurs about someone, for everyone to read, gains nothing?

Those were my key points. I'm trying to understand the guidelines. You'll note that I haven't jumped in on any of the threads in question. I'm merely asking to clarify.

I also didn't state that the individual hadn't been spoken to. Maybe they have. I can't tell.

All I do know is - is that everyone on LBT can see my wife being called a "F**king c**t".

I would like this type of thread deleted. I know I'm not alone.

[Penni60 45]

Can I ask when is it time to delete a thread?

Because a post where PhotoNut was called a "f**king c**t" is still very much present, and the person has gone without reproach other than the thread being locked.

When does a person get publicly rebuked? I've seen people be rebuked for the mildest of things, and I've seen the most egregious things go by without a word other than "this is locked".

Help me understand please?

Dawg your statements above implied there were no actions taken other than a thread being locked. Again how do you know there wasn't action taken?

The action of locking the thread is in fact a public rebukement for all parties involved in the exchange. It is like smacking the hand of a child when they attempt to touch a hot pan.

My bigger question is when does the issues DIE so that LBT gets back to support and encouragement and holding people up? If you are looking for apologies from the person making crash statements then you might as well wait for the world to end. Your and my time is better spent fighting the good battle of weight loss and self-acceptance for the things we have control over.

If you want further clarification on when a thread should be deleted then ask Alex the owner. As Moderators we cannot and should not delete a thread unless the originator of that thread asks us to delete it. The owner is the only one that has a right to delete without reason or excuse any thread or post. See POSTING GUIDELINE NO 5

[dawg 0]

I understand Penni.

Alex and all moderators.

I am formally requesting that the threads containing pure abusive attacks be deleted. There is an implicit threat of violence being made in one thread in particular that needs corrective action. I understand that this corrective action may be done privately and the action may not be publically visible.

I formally request that you PM me once the corrective action has been taken to resolve this extemely vile and potentially illegal issue.

[DonnaB 3]

I'm sorry Penni but I have to agree that by leaving that thread in place without public comment by a moderator implies to any casual reader that the offending poster went unpunished.

I also think that by leaving threads which have foul language and threats - both in blatant violation of LBT rules- indicates a tacit bias is being expressed.

I'm not saying that you personally are responsible for fixing all the problems on LBT, I am saying that there needs to be some public action taken when one member threatens another. Furthermore, regardless of the deletion rules of LBT, any slander or foul language, particularly when it is directed at someone in particular, should be removed from publicly viewable threads.

Since it appears that the moderators do not have the power to address this situation directly, I would be happy to forward my thoughts to the owner directly. What's his screen name so I can do that?

[Penni60 45]

Since it appears that the moderators do not have the power to address this situation directly, I would be happy to forward my thoughts to the owner directly. What's his screen name so I can do that?

Alex is the owner's screen name.

[Alexandra 55]

Dawg, your point is well taken and I have deleted the message in question. Deleting a whole thread is another matter and the moderators will discuss that.

[Woodys 0]

Holy Cripes.....................people, give it up already.........this crap is so damn tired and I've only been visiting this board for 2 weeks....this stuff is way too negative and is overshadowing the good this board can do. Please.......let it die and go away!

Carol

[Elisabethsew 50]

Penni simply posted the rules and made a kind request for peace on the board. It's Memorial Day weekend people. Let's give it a rest and stop REHASHING the same old stuff. Can't we call for a day of peace to honor all of those who gave their life for the freedom we enjoy in America today? Pretty please? I declare Monday (Memorial Day) a day of peace. Anyone want to join me?

[Dody 0]

Dawg, your point is well taken and I have deleted the message in question. Deleting a whole thread is another matter and the moderators will discuss that.

This thread is the psychotic ramblings of one individual against PhotoNut. Why wasn't it deleted instead of closed Alexandra. Only one person replied before you closed it, but you allowed it to remain, which makes me think in some way you are enjoying someone else's misery. I feel if someone attacked the moderators with horrible language and insulted you it would immediately be deleted.

It is time to take some action.

I have contacted Alex and complained about the "I'm Guilty" Thread. PhotoNut is a friend of mine and a very supportive person. She should not have been allowed to read that horrible post and have her feelings hurt...still you left it there....but NOBODY plays favorites right????

I have contacted Alex. Perhaps he will see things in a different light.

[Dody 0]

Penni simply posted the rules and made a kind request for peace on the board. It's Memorial Day weekend people. Let's give it a rest and stop REHASHING the same old stuff. Can't we call for a day of peace to honor all of those who gave their life for the freedom we enjoy in America today? Pretty please? I declare Monday (Memorial Day) a day of peace. Anyone want to join me?

You are so right about it being Memorial Day weekend, but apparently DeLarla took this Sunday to attack PhotoNut once more in her "I'm Guilty" thread which still remains. If you want this to stop perhaps Alex should get involved in allowing the moderators to let her keep posting this crap.