female only Advice needed

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

My bf has been going through a lot of stress. His family is really dysfunctional. Instead of sharing with me, he's just really moody and quiet. I know the stuff he is going through is really painful, but at the same time, I am really sick of the way he shuts down.

I sent a message to a guy on another dating site. he wrote back and asked for a picture. I sent a little newsy email, and sent a picture. I have not heard back from him. I don't know whether to wait, or send him another message and if so, what to say.

Vegas Angel, you can see the picture on my fb page. It's the only picture I have of me that I can send. I am really camera shy and take lousy pictures. Even though I am a size 10-12, I still look really fat in pictures.

I really need some advice here. I would like to send a little message and ask if he'd like to meet for coffee, cause you can't tell much from a picture or an email. Is anyone good with this sort of thing? Should I wait another couple of days? I sent the picture yesterday. The email he had sent was really nice, and he didn't seem like someone who was all hung up on looks.

This has happened to me before, where I have corresponded with men, then as soon as I sent the picture, all emails just stopped.

Please give me your advice!:sad0::001_wub:

[Malaika 50]

Daisy -

From a male's perspective - Bearded says:

First he wants to know if your BF is a FWB or are you in a committed relationship? That being said ... if he received a photo from someone and was really interested, he would shoot an email back within a day. If it was someone he was possibly interested in, it would take him 2 or 3 days to get back. But DO NOT send another email -- it makes you appear desperate - WHICH YOU ARE NOT. So his advice would be NOT TO EMAIL HIM AGAIN and move on unless you hear from him.

I agree with Bearded - give him a few days to contact you and if you don't hear from him, move on - if you contact him, you appear desperate and almost begging -- you're neither -

The dating game sucks doesn't it?

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

You know the situation with Bill, Vegas. He's been treating me like shit lately. I thought it was a committed relationship, but tonight he told me he was going camping with his brother his weekend. We have hardly spent any time together the past few weeks.

I sent you a message on fb for you to look at the picture. It's like a year old, when I was probably 25 lbs heavier. Could you take a look at it? Tell bearded to look at it too, and tell me what you think.

I am ready to tell Bill I want to start seeing other people, because he doesn't seem to have time for me anymore. If the picture looks lousy, I am going to find someone to take some newer pictures of me and sign up for match or something.

[Malaika 50]

Bearded says "she's cute" ... however, the photographer in him says he wouldn't use that picture and the reasons being you are facing the camera straighton - you should always be at about a 30 degree angle; which the way you are posed gives you no depth making you look wider than you actually are. Everything else is good - but he thinks you are cute!

I'd tell Bill you're going to start dating others - and why - and move forward.

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

Can you chat tonight? I am really down about this, and it would be really good to be able to talk to you.

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

I looked online at the dating site

and it tells if the person I was talking

about has been online. yesterday it

said has been online this week, and today

it says has been online this week. That

means he hasn't checked in on that dating site. That makes me feel a little better. I seriously doubt that he hasn't checked his email though.

[Suzannesh 376]

My bf has been going through a lot of stress. His family is really dysfunctional. Instead of sharing with me, he's just really moody and quiet. I know the stuff he is going through is really painful, but at the same time, I am really sick of the way he shuts down.

I sent a message to a guy on another dating site. he wrote back and asked for a picture. I sent a little newsy email, and sent a picture. I have not heard back from him. I don't know whether to wait, or send him another message and if so, what to say.

Vegas Angel, you can see the picture on my fb page. It's the only picture I have of me that I can send. I am really camera shy and take lousy pictures. Even though I am a size 10-12, I still look really fat in pictures.

I really need some advice here. I would like to send a little message and ask if he'd like to meet for coffee, cause you can't tell much from a picture or an email. Is anyone good with this sort of thing? Should I wait another couple of days? I sent the picture yesterday. The email he had sent was really nice, and he didn't seem like someone who was all hung up on looks.

This has happened to me before, where I have corresponded with men, then as soon as I sent the picture, all emails just stopped.

Please give me your advice!:sad0::drool5::001_wub:

Hey,

I see nothing wrong with a quick follow up E-mail to this person. Add me as your friend on FB and I will check out your picture. You can find me on Facebook under Suzanne Shewmaker Hinshaw. I think you are smart by moving on if your current boyfriend is acting funny. Enough is enough.

You are giving days away days of your life and sometimes no matter what you do, you can't fix someone. Every day you give away is a day you will never have again. There aren't enough days left in your life to fix someone. You deserve to have someone who cares about you and accepts you for who you are.

My suggestion is if you are camera shy, get a tripod and set it up with your camera and learn how to use the timer. Take some pictures of yourself with NO one around. See how they turn out and if you like any of them--you can keep taking them until you get some that you like and make you feel good about where you are now in life. You won't be so camera shy then. It will be just you and the camera, what do you have to lose? Not a darn thing.

You have to understand sometimes if they don't answer you back it isn't about you always, so don't take it as if it is something wrong with you. It might be them, they might think you wouldn't be interested in them, so that is why I think it would be a good idea to send another E-mail to them.

Hope that helps you some! I always say never give up, there is someone out there waiting to find someone just like you.

[Tiffykins 673]

Daisy, you know I adore you, but before you try to move on with someone else, break things off with Bill.

Don't make him a priority when all he is making you is a convenience. His behavior has been progressively getting worse, and he's getting more and more distant from you.

You deserve better, and I would get some new pictures to send out. If I lived closer, I'd come over, get you all dolled up and get you some pictures that will reel in the men.

[*susan* 1,709]

Daisy, I think Tiffy is right. You need to have closure with Bill before you move on, it is the fair thing to do for you, him and anyone you may become involved with.

Maybe you should do like Brandy and have some pinup photos or something done. That looks like so much fun to me, once I get to my goal, I want to have them done and give them to my hubby for a gift.

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

I don't think there is anyone around here that does pin up photos. I could look around though.

Bill and I had a really serious talk Saturday night, and I thought things would be better, but it's been more cr@p this week.

[Malaika 50]

The offer to come to LV still stands -- Bearded is a professional photographer and there are lots of great areas to takes pics -- and we can do sexy too!

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

I was looking at airfare, and it's a lot of money to spend right now. I had to spend a bunch with everything I went through with my dad. I would love to come but I can't see it just for a weekend. :sneaky2:

[Jaffa 5]

Does the new guy know anything about the old guy?

When I was looking for someone to date I had the following criteria.

They could not be in any phase of a current relationship with anyone else.

They had to be someone who didn't need me for financial reasons.

They had to be looking for someone to have fun and date, but not really looking to get married.

I found someone and married them with these rules.

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

There is no new guy.

I don't need anyone for financial reasons. my BF and I USED to have a lot of fun, but he's been really depressing lately. He knows I am not looking for marriage but then again, neither is he.

Edited July 24, 2009 by Oregondaisy

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

I am really depressed at the moment. Could use some words of wisdom.

Bill and I talked after work and he is very upset because he thinks I said something mean about his daughter in law on face book, which I didn't . He knows me better than that. He should know I would not do something mean like that on purpose.

He wants to "take a break" until he gets to Phoenix next month to talk things over with his daughter in law and son.

I didn't do a damn thing but they are poisoning his mind.