If you chose NOT to tell about your LB, share your story please

[PuraVida37 715]

Hello folks. Here I am again with another question!!

If you chose not to tell people at work or friends about your LB, how did you keep it secret? Did you change your mind and eventually tell? What kind of comments/questions did they ask? How did you handle it?

I am not planning to tell my coworkers. I know they will ask questions as they are super gossipy.

Thanks again for open and honest responses!

[3-Sibe-Mom 26]

I understand the super gossipy coworker scene. Some of my coworkers knew before I went out for the band. I am sure they all know now . I chose those I could trust. However the individual who is in control of my pay and flma forms is the one who puts her nose in it.

I figure I am doing something that will improve my health. They all saw me before and dieting does not work well with me because of my past. So I am not ashamed of what I did. I was ashamed of letting my eating get out of control. So I figure when I get back to work there will be a lot of questions :ph34r: .

[GoingforGoal 1,734]

Only told my mother and MIL. Husband knows because he was banded same day, but not the kids.

I didn't tell anyone else (friends, extended family, coworkers).

When asked about my weight loss... I said high Protein, low cals and working out... which is what it is LMAO

[Bandista 7,466]

I am really struggling with this. I have a list called "People Who Know" in a LapBand journal I started a month or so ago. Husband, local friend, far away friend, another friend who has weight issues -- she has been most skeptical -- and that's it so far. Hospital peeps, obviously. NOT telling my mother. She is elderly and a source of body/weight issues. I don't want to have to deal with her. We have a son turning 18 and I want to tell him at the right time (near to date), but otherwise I feel like I need my privacy. Except for here -- you guys are awesome.

[katie2244 11]

I've only told immediately family and two close friends.

I was scheduled for a hernia repair during the band procedure, so those know knew i was having surgery...i just said hernia repair if they asked.

It's been interesting to find that most friends say nothing, where people i know less well have been the ones commenting...and usually just "you're looking well". People like cashiers in stores i frequent, or friends of friends that i see occasionally have been the ones saying anything.

As for work...there is the gossip thing that i wanted to avoid, but there is also a judgmental thing...there is a health promotion team that has no qualms about commenting on everything people eat and do. So i am fairly sure people may have noticed, but only one person has said anything...and she is a co-worker that i am fairly close with, and who has been nothing but supportive and encouraging about everything, as she was before i had lost weight...so nothing really different.

Although there was my nephew's comment. Now this kid is all about unconditional love and non judgment, and he is too young to know about the health risks that comes with being obese and having diabetes, high blood pressure, sleep apnea and all the other things i have. I saw him 5-weeks post surgery, down about 40 lbs at the time, and he says "you look like spaghetti, i don't like it, i am worried". He hates the idea and doesn't understand the idea that anyone would feel badly about themselves for being overweight...so he was worried that i was losing weight because i felt badly about myself, or felt pressured by others somehow to lose weight, and he wanted me to know that he loved me the ways i was before.

My plan for when people asked was to go the whole "more Protein, fewer carbs, better workouts" routine ... but so far no one has asked. To the one friend that did say "you've lost a lot of weight" i replied "thank you" and he smiled and that was the end of the conversation. I like to be prepared...so i had my plans...but what's that expression...the best laid plans? Well...they may come in handy in the months ahead...who knows.

I'm just glad i had the choice whether to tell or not...and that i have an incredibly supportive family.

[icinderella 3]

I have chosen to only tell a few chosen people. I am very happy with my decision. It has been 2 years and to be honest, I wish I told less people however each person knows it is a secret.

[cflick 303]

I told my husband of course..mom sister and my daughter....all of who can be trusted not to spread it... at work I told my boss (male) I was having surgery needed a few days off..he asked what kind and I looked him straight in the eye and said u really have to know that. ..surgury was 4 mnths ago and he still thinks I had some sort of "lady" surgery. ..he was terrified by my response and just said no no I don't neeed to know..lol

that still makes me laugh... my co workers see me dress for the gym everyday at 5 so none have been to noisey about "exactly" what I've done. .. I did get a bad case of vertigo a couple mnths ago and my regional mgr said I was loosing weight to fast that's why I was sick.. I told him that wasn't it that I am under dr supervision for my wl...he was ok w that and didn't ask anything further (he was honestly just worried since he doesn't see me very often so he sees huge changes everytime he does see me)

The few times any friends have asked I tell them drastic lifestyle change hi Protein low carb and 7days a wk workout

[Irishflower79 183]

I am not telling to many people. No one from work will know and most friends won't know.

I have only told my aunt (she's my ride to and from the surgery),

my kids (only because most of my appts were over the summer so they went with me),

My PCP,

and pharmacy( to see if I could switch some meds to liquid)

I know most of the people in my life are very against any type of WLS. I don't want nor need to have that negativity in my life!

I don't want people judging me if I don't lose as fast as they feel I should be. My coworkers would be the worst as my weight has been the butt of many jokes.

I do wish I could tell more people and have their support, but that's just not possible with these people!

I appreciate this forum and live that I can come here and vent and get info any time of day or night!

[MookNana 61]

I've gone about half and half--my family and my best friend from high school know, but I'm not planning on telling neighbors, work friends, casual acquaintances, etc. I don't intend to lie, but I also don't intend to answer any questions I don't want to. It's not a secret and I'm not ashamed, it's just really none of their business.

The funny thing, however, is that I can't stop telling total strangers! The lady at hair Cuttery, the guy at GNC, and the flight attendant from last week all know. The nice thing is they were all so positive and supportive--I'm glad to have had those conversations.

[Melllima 8]

My mom, my brother who actually encouraged me to do it. I am single and so, no body else knows. As for the scars I said I had a complication with the bile system, so i had an operation. The funny thing that people see me tommy and they think I had a Lipo!!!! I am not gonna share it with anyone, maybe my husband if i got married, but even that Im not sure!

[Janiece 64]

I touched on this a few minutes ago in another thread. I'm honest with close friends and most co workers -- people who are there daily, who see what I eat and how hard I hustle at the gym. After a few asinine comments from casual acquaintances or people I just see sporadically, I don't go into details because I feel they're just being nosy or making conversation.. They're not genuinely concerned about my journey.

Unfortunately, family wasn't excluded from this either. I've had my band since Nov 2009 and I just told my parents last week. My mom probably weighs somewhere in the 350 - 400lb range, but I knew she would just be critical and not supportive. Due a recent cancer scare and some thyroid issues she's freaking with, I felt she would be more receptive. I asked for her help taking care of me this week post-arm lift and breast lift, and we've had some great convos about it! She's still not 100% on board with it, but

I will say, now that I've lost 120lbs, I'm a lot more comfortable opening up and sharing my st ory than when I first got started. I was so embarrassed at the beginning, but now that all of my hard work has paid off , I'm more confident and don't care as much about others' opinions. I think I had to wait and prove to MYSELF the Lapband would work for me before I decided to start screaming it from the mountain tops!

Sorry this was so lengthy! In summary: for me it depends on the audience.

[sp70 193]

I've only told one or two close friends at work. When the others ask what I am doing to lose weight I tell them high Protein, low carb, lots of Water and exercise and I write down everything I eat to hold myself accountable. This is the absolute truth minus a couple details.

[jennybean 175]

I am not banded yet, but don't plan on telling too many people. I usually am very open, but in this case I am shameful about my weight and don't want to talk about it, I guess. Also, if I fail, I will look even worse in my mind.

The thing is, I hate lying so this may be hard LOL. I think I will go with the high protien, low calorie and exercise line as it is really not a lie!! Like some others, I plan on saying it is a hernia operation or a problem with my stomach, again not really a lie.

[dedemarie 9]

Well I am getting banded on Friday and for some reason my story is different from everyone who posted you see I did tell my family and friends for some reason every time my mouth open out came the words I am getting wls and my family and friends are so happy for me I have not receive one bad response. I did say to one of my friends oh boy I told a lot of people and now everyone is going to be watching me and maybe that's why I did it usually I hate bring looked at but I think I might have spilled the Beans so I keep my self on the straight and narrow. I don't know I think I am surprise that I am having it done its going to be a change in my life but I am so ready for it and I know I have a very big support system willing to be there if I need them and I found this sight and l also have you guys to ask question and support.

P.S I told my husband no one at his job is to know. When they see me l will just be thinner

[Gmachris 15]

Some people prob look at it as a cure all. But it is still a lot of work there is NO easy wat to lose except maybe a serious disease and that is not easy either. I chose to tell my husband and daughter and that's easy. If someone wants to know I am on a lo carb hi Protein diet which is the truth. Just figure no one needs to know and I am not a conversation piece, that way.