Lying About LapBand

[stept04 465]

I did not have a problem with telling people I knew that I was having WLS, but I was unprepared for what would happen next. After telling everyone I knew I was not prepared for the fallout, which was everyone's expectations after the surgery. Every time I saw someone they looked me up and down and were constantly assessing my weight loss by some standard they had and when I did not meet it you could see it on there face. Then I ended up feeling like I needed to explain the difference between by-pass the sleeve and lap-band. I ended up having to go into a long spill about how lap-band works with the fills and all. Exhasting. Plus people would always say stuff about me having surgery in front of complete strangers that happened to be around. I got all kinds of different looks. If I could do it over I would not say anything unless someone asked.

~~~Stephanie

[BandtoSleevechick 171]

I tell everyone i know... Working in a correctional setting.. sad to say the gossip mill is almost as worse as the medical unit full of females i work with .. I would rather them know the truth then for them to call an intervention with me thinking i am doing something wrong.. Plus when i started there i was 220.. i ballooned to my highest at 313 and everyone saw that too... why not share my excitement with people i see every day with one of the best things in my life to date? And as of yet i have not had any negativity everyone has been excited for me. I do however hear alot.. Jen, you better not change... ( we had some who did) so i tell them i am the same as i was before.. just a smaller version!..

for the nay sayers.. when i should encounter them i am the type to tell them straight faced.. walk a mile in my shoes and then you can judge me and tell me this is easy.

[BandtoSleevechick 171]

I have not seen this here before and it really struck a nerve in me. If I could have done it myself I would have (like mostly everyone else here). I needed help of some kind and the lapband is just the ticket! LILady, welcome to this adventure.

Back on topic - I told everyone and have gotten no negative responses at all. People might be talking behind my back but I don't know about it so don't care. My mom can't help herself sometimes and occasionally asks if I should be eating that but she's MUCH better about it now that I've lost some weight.

Daddyof4.. My mom is the same way.. had gotten better and recently i had a stuck episode due to it going down to fast... she said to me.. That's the first that's ever happened.. i just smiled and said yeah .. while in my head i was thinking oh great the food nazi is back! lol Mom's mean well tho

[kll724 3,055]

I told people that I felt would understand and needed to know. Others just knew that I was watching what I ate and exercising. Both true.

[dannygoody 12]

I tell everybody the truth. I was banded on May 28th and have lost 51 lbs. I have had almost all positive responses. One person said "Couldn't you just go on a diet?" I simply said "This was the best solution for me" I personally don't care what people think. I feel great. One thing that has happened also is people pull me aside and ask who my doctor was. LOL.

[Daliaha 78]

I am suppose to have surgery the 6th of September, and the only people I have told or know are my husband, a friend who had lapband surgery, my BFF, and another friend. I will not tell my mother, she is the most negative person in the world. She always has to be better then me,compares my sister and me and tells me I'm not as good as my sister at anything I have tried or have done.

I'm fearful that she will just be so negative when I'm banded ..ie. your not loseing enough, or you still look fat, or why arnt you working harder..that until I'm well on my way I not say a thing, nor will I tell my sister..she will just tell my mother.

I'm relieved they live in Georgia, and I'm in Illinois,I don't see them but a few times a year.. so I guess it will just be a surprise

[GodsTyro 63]

Like others, I think it's a personal choice. Me personally, I haven't lied about it, but on the other hand, I also believe the Lap Band is not a miracle drug, it is a tool that without the work you put into it, you are not going to see the results, and so all my friends, all my co-workers see me constantly kicking my butt at the gym on a regular basis, eating right, watching my calories, making sure I don't drink my calories - and because of that I have been able to drop over 90lbs already since I got the lap band done in November without even being in the green zone that so many are normally in rather quickly.

Now don't get me wrong, you can lose the weight without doing the gym thing, as many have, but the band isn't going to do it all for you. Will you lose weight with the band if you don't change your eating habits? Yes, because you are still cutting your calories by a lot just by having the band. But my perspective is, why get the surgery if you aren't willing to be a healthier and better you? Because whether I am skinny or I am fat, if I'm still eating like crap - my body is still crap. I have also seen many folks that only lose a certain amount of weight with the lap band because they don't eat proper lean foods to help them.

The gym is really only 10% of your routine, it is food that is the 80% and then genetics tend to be another 10% - so can you lose all your weight you want to without the gym? Yes. But, I've also noticed that weight loss is just as much physical as it is psychological - most folks work thru that psychological within the gym or some sort of active activity.

For me that's my #1 pet peeve, is someone that gets the lap band with no interest in changing their eating habits, because then whats the point? I have seen this way too many times, and way too many times those folks complain about that the lap band doesn't work and they regret getting it. It's something that makes me want to smack them for.

I don't think it's a issue for someone that lies about having the lap band done though - like I said I think it's a personal choice, and in many cases it's because someone they told was extremely unsupportive about it - causing the fear of "what if everyone is unsupportive?" I have been beyond blessed to have everyones support. The only support I did not have, was because they had 2 friends that had gotten it done with complications, but as I told them, their 2 friends with complications goes against my many friends with amazing results, and since then seeing me kick my butt constantly at the gym they have been very supportive of me getting the lap band done.

I honestly have no interest in getting to the green zone as so many get to, but that's a personal preference, simply because I am seeing the results I want to see thru my own butt kicking (not to mention I simply love food) but the lap band still helps me keep on track and I do not regret getting it. I simply can put in more food than a normal lap band person in the green zone can eat, however I still eat less than a normal person with no lap band does.

[newlife1977 5]

Well me personally did not tell anyone but my sister it your personal business if you had a std you wouldn't go around broadcasting lol ijs . Secondly the eating right and exercise my friends won't think that's far fetched only because last year I started working out and eating right and lost 70lbs in 4 months the problem was keeping it off . And I just don't think it's lying because u don't tell people your personal medical history just my thoughts

[MiniMi 1,468]

Here is my opinion for what it is worth: I didn't even really know what was involved in the process, I was a wls student in training. Yes I did my research beforehand but living it is a totally different thing. I needed my time and energy to be focused on me and my journey and not on those who wanted to discuss their thoughts on the subject. Once I feel like telling I will but for now only 6 ppl know.

And guess what?, it takes eating right and exercise to be successful. I'm just now feeling restriction and I'm almost at goal.

[SillyAuntDi 1,610]

I have only chosen a few people to tell. Maybe 5 family members and 7 coworkers/friends. I have had issues all my life with feeling like I'm judged based on what I put in my mouth. Not so much the weight on my body, but the food that literally enters my mouth. I've lost a significant amount of weight in the past that drew a lot of unwanted attention from people that never gave me the time of day before. They suddenly felt the need to discuss their meals and exercise plans with me. Then, when the weight started to creep back on (due to medical issues and a new food allergy), they started commenting on my food choices. Instead of asking me why the sudden change happened...they passed judgement on my food intake. So, when I finally came to the decision to pursue the banded life, I immediately made an appointment with my counselor to discuss my anxiety. I'm terrified of what people will say when I start losing weight again...and who will pop out of the woodwork to become my new buddy. I don't want to feel like people are watching my food choices. I don't want to feel like I have to explain anything to anybody. So, she empowered me with the permission to not tell. No, I don't have to lie, but I can simply say I'm working hard and making changes. I don't have to go into detail. And, I have permission to say I don't want to discuss it since it's a personal matter. My family members that know are already familiar with the procedure and have committed to helping me stay "on track" and my friends who know are thrilled. They know how I struggle and they understand my "issues." So, yes...I want to be of service to others who are curious about the process and I can do that here with my virtual friends . And, I want to eventually share with anyone who asks. But for now, I don't have to. And, that's OK.

[SillyAuntDi 1,610]

Oh..and before you ask...yes. My counselor and I are discussing why I worry about other's opinions of what I choose to eat .

[TamaraKaye 6]

I will personally tell anyone who asks. Those close to me know the hard work i do put in, and even did before the band. What some don't realize is those who have the band may not lose any weight. We still have to make a conscience effort on what food goes in our mouths. Sure, I could snack on fried food, chips, and ice cream all day if I wanted... but would i lose weight? No. It is the conscience decisions I make that determine my weight loss, not my band. It is a tool, and you have to know how to work it.

[goalseeker 695]

I tell everyone. But I also include the fact that I track my calories, don't eat a lot of carbs and workout 6 days a week. I believe that part of the misconceptions people have is we keep quiet and act like we didn't have help. Yes I had surgery but I could easily sabotage my progress by eating around my band. I wonder how many people know someone who lost a large amount if weight "naturally" but in reality they had surgery. That's just my two cents. I confidently share it all and if they don't like it they can kiss my a@@???œ I'm probably healthier than they are anyway lol

[goalseeker 695]

I don't expect everyone to feel the same way as I do about this' date=' so of course I accept that there will be those who don't want to say anything, and those who do, but I decided to tell everyone. And the reasons were

1) I wanted to be accountable. If I failed on the band, and everyone knew I had one, I only had myself to blame.

2) I didn't want anyone who was overweight to think that I 'miraculously' lost the weight and kept it off for years all on my own, because it would have made ME feel like a complete failure with no willpower if I were them

3) I wanted to show them that when you have a problem, you do what you need to in order to fix it. There is no shame in that.

I've never regretted telling everyone. I think I represent a good outcome as a lapband patient, and if that helps someone else make the decision to change their lives, I'm proud of that.[/quote']

Great response! I agree 100%.

[runt71 70]

Well I wasn't telling anyone; have told a select few. Of course the ex knows now (he gets to play chauffeur for the kids while I recover) and has been totally negative. Told a friend (whose same size if not larger) was very negative (well IF I WAS BIG ENOUGH I'D DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT TOO) lmao!!!! The few others I have told have been surprised but supportive.

Pre op I have only lost 12 pounds (dr expected 5) so no one has questioned that.

Band day is tomorrow!!!