Having doubts:(

[kjakaty 2]

I go in for my consult in August and it looks like things will move pretty fast from there. I'm starting to doubt things and wonder if I should do this at all! I have 70 lbs to lose. I'm 28 and have been 220+ lbs since I was 20 and have struggled with weight my whole life. After 3 kids and numerous failed diets and gym memberships I've started seriously considering wls. Up until the last few days I've been sure of it. Now I'm wondering if I want to deal with the side effects of having a band. My husband would like me to lose some weight but doesn't understand why I can't just do it on my own. It's so frustrating that I can't. I'm scared to lose the ability to binge or rely on food for comfort. I love to cook and show my love for others with food. I know I want to be healthier and look better but I'm not sure if I can achieve it even w a band! Has anyone else struggled w these thoughts on wls?? Just feeling down, depressed, and somewhat of a failure and needed to vent some of it out before I throw in the towel on the band all together.

[catfish87 3,471]

I can relate to the "having second thoughts" part of your concern. I know I did! Second, third, fourth, etc.... even after discussing it with my PCP and then eventually meeting my surgeon/staff at the seminar. It's certainly not something to rush into without being sure. Get lots of information, and discuss your concerns.

For me, I took a good look at my history....I was continuing to fail at dieting and getting to the point where my failure would lead me to SERIOUS health issues. And being tired, exhausted all the time. I've lost a lot of weight in the past....then said just one piece of bread, one donut, one bag of chips, etc. I'm sure you know what I'm referring to. Those diets have one goal in mind....to reach the END of them because they suck.

Then what??? What do we do after the diet? For me, it was back to the same old, same old...even more because I was in deprivation mode during that diet.

So after much research and talking with people who actually had the band...some successful, some not, I decided it was my best chance at changing paths on that road I was on. I knew I had to try something besides dieting for the rest of my life.

I'll say this...I've been frustrated, mad, depressed, and Hungry along my trip down this road. But once you get to a good spot with your band.....it works! There is no question in my mind about that. It won't necessarily be easy to change your eating habits...at least from my experience. Being morbidly obese wasnt easy either. Think about that...MORBIDLY obese. The experts use that term for a reason.

I have my life back, thanks to my band and a wonderful team of professionals at my surgeons office, who NEVER told me it would be easy....just that it would work! I wish you much success in whatever your decision is. Never, Ever give up.

[kjakaty 2]

Thank you for your response! I also lost a lot of weight before(85lbs) and yet here I am again. That's also why I feel so frustrated with myself. I worked so hard before and still ended up in the same boat. I push myself and can do a 5k but I just don't stick with anything and make it part of a routine. That's my main reason in considering a band to have the daily reminder and a tool to curb the eating. My main concerns are scarring, gurgling, and excess skin. I'm def doing research and soul searching. I have 3 kids that I don't want to be embarrassed of me or even worse lose me because I may start to have health related issues as I get older and heavier. I guess I'm just at a crossroads of should I try it on my own again or go ahead and get a band. I know I'm the only one that can decide that, but it helps to hear from others.

[catfish87 3,471]

Yes...only you can decide. Hopefully, with lots of good information to help you make your decision.

I've told several people recently, I don't get on here to try and sell anyone on getting the band. The companies that manufacture/own the band have plenty of public relations folks to sell/promote the band....thats what they get paid for. They don't need me to do that....although I would IF ASKED, because it has been nothing short of lifechanging for me.

Almost four years after getting banded, I get on here to still learn what works and what doesn't for successful bandsters...also what to avoid from folks who aren't successful. And just share my experience...

[MandaMom23 684]

I can relate to lots of those feelings! The first time I considered surgery, the thought of giving up my security blanket (aka FOOD!!) terrified me! What would I do if I got stressed?? How would I deal with my mom's over the top family dinners?? What about all my favorite foods...could I really give them up??? I couldn't handle the thought! I decided to give it one last try 'on my own' (<---I seriously dislike that expression now!!). I did, and lost 60lbs in just over a year. Ended up with some unexpected health problems, and gained that 60lbs back in less than 5 months. So depressing. I knew at that point I needed some help!! I researched all the different options for wls, and decided that the band offered exactly what I was looking for. I'm now 6 months out of surgery, and couldn't be happier!

As for some of the things you mentioned...I too love to cook, and share food with others. Only now I enjoy tweaking my favorite meals, and making them healthier. As far as scarring, my incisions are teeny tiny and I can hardly see them anymore! My biggest one is where my port is located, but it's only about an inch long. Excess skin...yes, I have it, but it doesn't bother me. My clothes hide it, and frankly, I'd rather have excess skin than fat underneath there to fill it out!! I don't have any issues with gurgling, only right after surgery (like maybe the first week or so??).

My best advice to you, is you have to be ready to make and accept the changes that come with the band. I'm not going to lie it's not always easy, and YOU will have to do the work...this is why I now dislike the whole 'do it on my own'. you don't go in for surgery and magically come out 100lbs lighter (wouldn't that be fabulous?!) The band is a wonderful TOOL, but only YOU can control what you're feeding your body, and how much. You are still doing all the work, the band will just help you along in your journey.

Wishing you all the luck you need to make your decision. Just take time to think things through, and do what you feel would be best for YOU!

[kjakaty 2]

It's so good to hear and see everyone's success! Thank you for taking the time to reply. I'm continuing with my process of getting the band and am continuing to research. I know that it will require a life change that I am ready for and scared of at the same time. It feels kind if like trying to find excuses to stay in a bad relationship. Lol. I know I would rather deal with a little skin and some tummy aches over dealing with lugging around all the baggage I'm carrying around. It's just hard to deal with my mental food issues but I will have to face them sooner or later.