Cold Stone Creamery

[bermy 0]

In my mind I still love sweets, but after a year of being banded I am finding that my tendency to shovel in large quantities makes me feel ill. I still try to eat those once-loved goodies, I really do miss them but like cigarettes they dont really have that good taste much anymore. The problem is, nothing has replaced that empty-comfort spot. I love the smell of bread baking but I cannot tollerate eating bread, except the crusts and only if I eat it very slowly.

But there is an upside to it all. I was in the gym last week and as I passed the mirror I did a double take, a tripple take. My body is not recognizable even to me. Its been so many many years......I go to sleep thinking ...I can feel my pelvic bone..... I'm writing and I suddenly look at my wrists and they look so normal and slim....I look at my arms and legs.who is this woman? No. seriously. Im spending so much time just looking at myself, seeing how much space surrounds me when I look down at the space I do not fill in my chair. My face looks different, more youthful, I spend as much time looking at myself as I used to spend avoiding the view. Who cares about icecream really? I mean I eat it but boy to look at ones self in such a new child-like way, do you know what I mean? Not trying to be this sexy thing, its really not about that. Sometimes Im walikg a hill and I realise that I might not feel like walking but I CAN walk without huffing and puffing and then I feel myself smiling and I am aware that I am the happy person I've wanted to be for so many years. Hell , who cares about the icecream, really?? I just wanted to say this to someone. I wanted to say if I dont loose another lb, I look good in my clothes now, I fit very comfortably on an airplane seat, when I enter a room I dont wonder if the chair will hold be, I can fasten my shoe without being winded, my bottom looks normal. Everytime I see myself I am reminded that the lap band worked, part of me always wondered if it would work. I guess I tried it out of desperation, but I had doubts.

I have now lost 106 lbs I think. Now I am watching the inches melt away that's why I sort of dont recognize myself. Seems like every lb I loose now is even more noticable.The sweat pants I wore all winter have been thrown away. I gave the last of my big clothes away, my closet is empty. Part of me wants to run out and shop but even that I have found VERY traumatic. Ive gone to the stores but I dont know how to shop anymore. I avoided doing that too. Never able to find the color and style I wanted or worse finding it and looking horrible in it, but hey that's okay too. I'm just taking it slow, trying not to bore my family (smile) but I'm telling you I am doing one heck of a lot of smiling these days , at odd times, whenever I remember or cross my legs....

To all of you out there who are at the begining of this journey I wish you every success

[Joy Joy 0]

Thanks guys .....I know that I should stay away...but it's ok to indulge once in a while...my B/F just got me a membership to a gym so I am really looking foward to going! Hopefully the activity will be enough to curb my cravings a little!

[Kathy473 1]

I have to admit...I just had ColdStone about an hour ago and it was good!!! I had the small serving of the cinnamon flavored ice cream with a little pecan....Did I feel guilty? A little. But do I work out? Yes. I am so not going to deprive myself from something I rarely get to have to begin with. I don't think anyone should. I think it is ok as long as you don't over do it!

[Marimaru 7]

It's really really yummy, but one look at the calories (which can be found on their website) and I haven't been back. Not to say I wont go back again, but it will DEFINATLY be something that is few and far between.

[PhotoNut 7]

Bermy, I relate so well with your mindset. I heard every word you said and I really understood. I haven't even reached my half way mark yet, but I know that the benefits I've seen from cutting sugar and flour out of my diet have been so enormous that I really have no desire to want them back. Like you, I really love the smells of certain foods and what I've done is re-train my brain to accept the wonderful aromas as the pleasure and not as a trigger to eat. The pleasure of smelling baking goodies is enough for me now. I can close my eyes and take in a deep breath and marvel at the wonderful sensations that the aromas give me, rather than salivating at the mouth and stuffing myself until I'm miserable and depressed and embarassed for being such a pig. That in itself has been a HUGE victory for me. Will I ever eat the stuff again? At this point, I couldn't say. I did enjoy the taste of the creamy icecream with various fruits mixed in, but I also know that I am not a person who can control my quantities. I am so afraid of letting in one bite of something that can easily be abused and defeat me, that it's just not worth giving too much thought to "trying" it.

Thanks for you post Bermy. It was deep and it was so important. I hope everyone at some point really truly understands what you were trying to tell us. *hugs*

[bermy 0]

Well you know Photo Nut this view of the new person sort of popped out at me just a week or so ago which sounds rediculous I know. Still it is true. I knew the weight was going but maybe the inches were lagging, then all of a sudden I trully saw a huge difference. And I want to shout but then you cant do that too much around your fat friends can you ? and I swear skiny folks just dont understand. So I look at myself which I'm sure on some level is very healthy since I spent so many years avoiding myself

I dont control portions well either but whenever I binge that food never stays down anyway. Im thinking that maybe my body dosent like it quite so much even though my tongue certainly does lol. But alas ! old habits are hard to break. Having confessed that, I know that in spite of all, my eating habits have improved a lot this year. And Im not into beating myself up for wanting or eating food. Im just finding a new way to not have my whole world revolve around the thought of food whether I'm eating it or trying to avoid eating it. Thats what I meant when I said that really looking at myself alone where I can take my time and not have to 'play down" this huge happeing in my life is as much a treat as eating lol. You know you dont want to appear to be bragging around fat friends ( even though they could go out and do what we did) but damn I feel like shouting from the rooftop ! And that's a fact !

[Sunta 4]

Am I the only one who hates Cold Stone ice cream??? I tried it twice, and both times, it felt like I was chewing gum because it's so Gummy in my mouth! It literally was "bouncy" like a gummy bear or chewing gum. Yuk! I tried it the second time because I thought the first time might be a fluke, but no, the same thing happened the second time with a different flavor at a different store. I looked it up online and it turns out they use like three times the normal amount of guar gum (to prevent it from melting when folding in the other stuff). It was horrible. Maybe if you think about the extra guar gum next time you will realize what I'm talking about and it will help break your addiction because it was truly gross. Good luck.

[bermy 0]

Well there are no Cold Stone Stores in my part of the world but i must say if ever I pass one when next I am in the U.S. I will definately weigh in on this debate.....now see what you all have done?!!

[FunnyDuddies 6]

i don't like the ice cream, but holy heck!! The chocolate dipped waffle cones with nuts. omg. can i just have one of those? LOL

[medussa 0]

I have enough addictions to break....thanks for the warning as I will NEVER enter the place after reading this!! I am glad I never knew as I have one on the corner and have never visited.