Courage to not feel embarrassed I failed.

[Ninejuan1 28]

Hello fellow banders,

Heaviest -330

Day of surgery - 283

Most lost- 250

Today- 278

I was banded back in Sept 2010. I was so excited to get banned and knew all the things i had to do. eat slow, chew chew chew, eat right, and exerciser. I was ready! Fast forward to today's date and I have no idea what happened. I feel so embarrassed to see people I know that knew I had the surgery. I have been on this odd funk emotional that I'm not used to (not depressed) maybe ashamed. This started about 1-2 weeks ago. I guess I must have realized I failed my band. So this was how I found this web link. I'm glad I'm not alone.

I have not returned to get a fill or a follow up with my doctor since about Nov. 2011. I had to go through Facebook pictures to look at my weight loss and weight gain photos. Looks to me that for about 1 year kept it off, but it has slowly came back. Im just about the same weight I was at my surgery date. So now im embarrassed to pick up the phone and call my doctor. Im sure they will be supportive, but I dont know if Im ready to sit in the "hot seat" to tell them I failed. I know I need to get back on track!

Im glad I found this forum.

Im happy to hear other suggestion on what you did to get back on the wagon.

Thanks,

Juan

[Redesigned_Curves 312]

Just remember...that's one of the good things about the band, its adjustable! Learn from your mistakes and use them to help you in the future. You now know you can do it, but you also know how easy it is to slip back in to old habits.

[PattyGirl66 1,243]

Hey Juan,

Listen, you already know what you have to do, besides who am I to judge anyone! You said it best, "get back on track".

You know the first start is to make an appt. with your bariatric surgeon and let him/her truthfully know what is going on. They are there to 'help' you. The beauty of the band is that it is always there to 'help', but you have to do your part.

You are going to be on the right path soon, just don't give up....

[mrsto 2,925]

I agree with all above.

If your hesitation is about being on the hot seat with your doctor, don't let that stop you. BELIEVE me, he's heard and seen it all before. My doctor told me that 30% of banded patients do great; 30% fail completely, and the ones in between lose about 1/2 of their weight. Though you are disappointed with yourself, you are not an unusual case. If you really and truly want to get back on track & resume moving toward a healthier you, then pick up that phone today & make the call. As PattyGril said, they are there to help you, not judge you. Possibly your fear of THEIR judgement, is nothing more than a projection of your own SELF-judgement. Turn that judgement into action, and you'll be on your way

Good luck!

[Ninejuan1 28]

So I just had the courage!!!! I CALLED!!! ready for this?!! I asked to set an appointment with my Dr. and they said they sent out a letter about 1 year ago and they no longer do bariatric surgery! ?????? ok my fault i have not called in over a 1year but NOW WHAT DO I DO?????? Holy Crap! All they told me is that my doctor is no longer at that office. They wont say where she went. Now its a mission to find her.... (cue the mission impassable theme.)

[catfish87 3,471]

Wow...are you reading my story or what?

Starting @ 324

About one year post op @ 238....thanks mainly to dieting.

Then I quit losing, acutally started back UP in weight to around 275, but "hey, I was still down 50 lbs" so I thought that was gonna be it for me. I wasn't meant to be a "normal" weight I thought....couldn't possibly be. After a year and a half of not visiting my doctor, due to embarrassment, I had a friend convince me to go back. I did..with much anticipation of "being in that hot seat" you describe.

My surgeon was so fantastic!!!....his office during my hiatus, had started using fluoro for all fills. I got a couple of ADJUSTMENTS, got to correct RESTRICTION, and couldn't be happier.... (read my story for all the details, as there was also an installation issue with my band that got corrected, hence the dieting phase)

You too, need to get yourself back to your surgeon. You had surgery! An ADJUSTABLE surgery...

I've been there. I know exactly what you're feeling. This website has helped me a tremendous amount. Others on here have been where you are at too. Read and listen to what those EXPERIENCED people write. Those that have overcome/adapted/succeded. You can too! Best wishes for your success. NEVER, EVER give up!

[KAATNS 1,473]

Today is a new day. Start over and don't look back. You got this and we're here for you.

[mrsto 2,925]

So I just had the courage!!!! I CALLED!!! ready for this?!! I asked to set an appointment with my Dr. and they said they sent out a letter about 1 year ago and they no longer do bariatric surgery! ?????? ok my fault i have not called in over a 1year but NOW WHAT DO I DO?????? Holy Crap! All they told me is that my doctor is no longer at that office. They wont say where she went. Now its a mission to find her.... (cue the mission impassable theme.)

GEEZ!! Google her. She may come up that way. You can also hook yourself up with another bariatric surgeon, but make sure you get your records from the one who did the surgery. It sounds like all you need are fills, and a bariatric support system. If you can't find your doctor online, talk to a couple of other practices. BUT - GOOD FOR YOU! You made the call......the first step!

[mrsto 2,925]

So I just had the courage!!!! I CALLED!!! ready for this?!! I asked to set an appointment with my Dr. and they said they sent out a letter about 1 year ago and they no longer do bariatric surgery! ?????? ok my fault i have not called in over a 1year but NOW WHAT DO I DO?????? Holy Crap! All they told me is that my doctor is no longer at that office. They wont say where she went. Now its a mission to find her.... (cue the mission impassable theme.)

Another way you might find her, is to call your insurance company. They should be able to look her up if she's still contracted with them.....at her new location. Hopefully she didn't leave the state!

[Ninejuan1 28]

Another way you might find her, is to call your insurance company. They should be able to look her up if she's still contracted with them.....at her new location. Hopefully she didn't leave the state!

Thank you. I called insurance company and they only have her records showing active at the same location where I have it. so it was a dead end. Thanks for the lead.

I Googled, her name and same info too.

still trying,

[catfish87 3,471]

Does the office still have your records? If so, maybe just check your area for a different doc that still is doing the surgeries, and call to explain your situation. Was your office able to re-send you a copy of the letter. Hopefully, it gave advice on where to go for future consults/fills/etc. Or maybe look on here for others who had the same doctor and see what they have done. Who was your doc, if you don't mind me asking?

[catfish87 3,471]

Maybe this page will help...

http://www.lapbandtalk.com/surgeons/

[Ninejuan1 28]

Does the office still have your records? If so, maybe just check your area for a different doc that still is doing the surgeries, and call to explain your situation. Was your office able to re-send you a copy of the letter. Hopefully, it gave advice on where to go for future consults/fills/etc. Or maybe look on here for others who had the same doctor and see what they have done. Who was your doc, if you don't mind me asking?

Thanks Catfish!

Just called them back, yes they have a copy of the letter they sent. The reason I never received a letter from them was because for some how my address was changed to a San Antonio TX address. So if they did send something its in TX. lol. So we corrected that. Now just waiting on the fax.

[Kime-lou 648]

Even if you can't find your surgeon, find a surgeon willing to take you on. It is likely that once you got to the point where you started going back up you needed another fill. Get back to a doc and restart the program.

You only fail when you quit trying. The important thing is to restart now before you gain more back.

[B-52 7,113]

Did YOU fail...or did the BAND fail.....

To me, there is a big difference....I have failed at every weight loss venture I have ever attempted....started out good, then eventually it was as though I never lost any weight to begin with, often gaining more back than I started out with......

That is why I needed surgery....to do what I was unable to do....

I am a failure!