Don't understand.

[stept04 465]

I don't understand what's going on with me for the past couple of weeks I've been having second thoughts about getting this surgery. I look in the mirror and just think is this really going to work. I think yea maybe I'll lose 25 pounds or so but will it really work, so that I don;t have to look and feel this way anymore. I just can;t see myself that way right now. I just keep thinking am I going to go through this and nothing happen and I'll just have stuff inside me. I don't know why I'm so discouraged it seems to work for most people that work it, but all I see is the failure part or the complication part. Something will happen or I'll just happen to fail again. Like my fate is to be fat. I can't stand the thought. I'm tearing up just thinking about it. Has anyone gone though this? Maybe this is normal, just maybe. Thanks for letting me vent.

[dylanmiles23 2,198]

I understand your thoughts. I had the surgery at 61 1/2 and wish I knew about the band many years ago. The best thing I did for me and everyone else involved in my life. Yesterday I went to my PCP and she said without all my fat she can hear my heart mummer better. (I see the heart doctor next month.)

​Have you been going to the support groups and when there listening to others and asking questions? I love my meetings. I have learned a lot there and I also noticed everyone loses weight at different paces which helps me. I have slowed down a lot in the past few months but I am still happy with my loss. Today my brother sent me a picture he took from Passover, in March. Boy I look great compared to last year at my highest. I would share the picture but don't know how to.

Just remember do the BAND for you! and no one else. I don;t take any more meds except Vitamins and minerals. I was taking about 12 different ones before and I don't snore anymore either.

[tootiemagoo 16]

I too am worried about failing with the band, but the support of others before me and those who are at the same stage as me has helped... Plus I have been researching a lot to see what people are doing to fail do I can avoid doing the same.... I have done everything else.... THIS IS IT.... I refuse to fail. You can do this too, find you mindset that you are all in and failure is not an option.... But I am doing the surgery for the physical tool, but I have also started seeing a counselor to work on my mental food issues... Cuz I think if most of us only ate when we were hungry, we wouldn't be in this mess!! Personally, my weight issues is all mental and emotional!!

[michpell39 399]

I have those same thoughts, what if this my last resort doesn't work what if I stay fat , all I can do is get the band and think that I CAN do this that I WONT fail

[SueBee01 630]

We all have the same thoughts. That is what finally got me to make the decision for WLS as nothing else was working. I am here to tell you, it does and can work if you put your mind to it. I am 15 mo post op and down 158 pounds. It is hard work, but can be done. You will find lots of support here and many who have been successful so far and lots of new people that feel the same way as you.

Track everything on MyFitnessPal.com. It is very motivating to see where you will be in five weeks as it shows you when you enter your food and exercise everyday. Eat right, exercise, chew, chew, chew and drink lots of Water. You will be fine!

[newbeebee 23]

I have only been banded since March 12th - so by no means experienced with the band, but I also had many doubles prior to the surgery. I think we have been telling ourselves for many years that we must be failers to have gotten to the weight we are and again failers because we cann't get the weight off ourselves. I think a good part of this process to succeed is to be able to change those voices to "I can do this" "I am worthy" I am down 30 lbs have 50 to go but am beginning to be able to look in the mirror and think ya I am worth this and I can do this. I hope you find the courage to do what is right for you and begin your journey to a better you!

[2muchfun 8,927]

If you've tried every diet known and failed, if you've tried every exercise routine guaranteed to make you look like a fitness model and failed, if you refuse to go on living a much shorter life, then WLS is and was the only answer for me and I never doubted or questioned my decision.

I have children in their 20's and 40's. I have 6 grandkids. I want to see all of them grow into productive citizens and if I die young that won't happen. I refused to spend the rest of my life in a fat painridden body. I knew that WLS was the only way I could achieve my goal of living a more active and longer life.

If you have doubts going into this, maybe you're not ready? But think about the life you lead now vs. the life you could be living, and make a commitment. If you can't commit to making major changes in your eating behavior you will not succeed. Almost guaranteed!

There is so much truth in the power of positive thinking and commiting yourself 100% to something so important in(the rest) your life. Sorry to go on so long on my soapbox, but you've gotta believe you can do this or you'll find reasons why it didn't work for you.jmo

tmf

[It'sTime 82]

Don't fall into that trap!!! Your fate is to be skinny and healthy, that's why you need to go through with your surgery.

I recently read 93% of the people that have the LapBand approve of the surgery. Many wonder why they didn't have it sooner!!!

Have the surgery and set yourself free!!!

[mrsto 2,925]

I understand your thoughts. I had the surgery at 61 1/2 and wish I knew about the band many years ago. The best thing I did for me and everyone else involved in my life. Yesterday I went to my PCP and she said without all my fat she can hear my heart mummer better. (I see the heart doctor next month.)

​Have you been going to the support groups and when there listening to others and asking questions? I love my meetings. I have learned a lot there and I also noticed everyone loses weight at different paces which helps me. I have slowed down a lot in the past few months but I am still happy with my loss. Today my brother sent me a picture he took from Passover, in March. Boy I look great compared to last year at my highest. I would share the picture but don't know how to.

Just remember do the BAND for you! and no one else. I don;t take any more meds except Vitamins and minerals. I was taking about 12 different ones before and I don't snore anymore either.

Great that you have pictures to compare :-) I've avoided cameras like the plaque for a long time, but can probably dig something up from a few months ago. Actually, I take it back......my surgery was on 3/25....the first night of Passover, and pictures were taken at the hospital. Needless to say, this year no seder pictures, but for good reason!!

And I'm SO glad to hear that you're off of so many meds. That's fantastic! I know you feel fabulous I look forward to being where you are. I started this venture at an older age, too (57), and so far it's been the best decision I've made about anything, in a very long time.

[lilmispcl 298]

I had surgery on April 5th. The week prior to surgery I did have my doubts. I dreaded being one of the band failures. BUT I realized that the decision to succeed is all mine. I will not fail at this ... its a tool to be successful and I plan to use it. If you use it and follow dr.'s orders you will succeed. You are not alone in this journey and if you use the band and all the support you have you will be successful but if you don't put in the work it won't work. Like any diet you have to stick to it...the band helps by taking away the hunger. If you are hungry after healing you need to be willing to work with your dr to get your band at the right setting so you can be successful. Don't be afraid to work with your doctor as often as you need to until you are feeling satisfied between meals and losing. I am only 4 weeks out of surgery but I honestly feel that this was the best decision I ever made. Because although I still fight with my head my band will not allow my head to win....I know I will cause myself pain if I try to gorge at a buffet so those days are over for me and I couldn't be happier about that! Day to day I work the band by sticking to my dietary instructions but the band keeps me in check Its a great partnership!!

[gowalking 10,790]

Great that you have pictures to compare :-) I've avoided cameras like the plaque for a long time, but can probably dig something up from a few months ago. Actually, I take it back......my surgery was on 3/25....the first night of Passover, and pictures were taken at the hospital. Needless to say, this year no seder pictures, but for good reason!!

And I'm SO glad to hear that you're off of so many meds. That's fantastic! I know you feel fabulous I look forward to being where you are. I started this venture at an older age, too (57), and so far it's been the best decision I've made about anything, in a very long time.

I'm 54. I like reading your posts and dylanmiles. I suspected you two were around my age. I also went from two hypertensive meds to one...and at a much lower dosage to boot. Except for my knee, the rest of me is doing much better since I started dropping the weight. If I eventually need a knee replacement, at least I'll have a better chance that it will be successful without all the extra weight.

Step104....it's normal to feel like you might fail. I just posted a topic earlier today about the fear of failing even though I'm doing very well at 3 1/2 months post banding having lost 53 lbs. so far. Listen to the other folks who replied. Work the program and you will see results.

[mrsto 2,925]

I don't understand what's going on with me for the past couple of weeks I've been having second thoughts about getting this surgery. I look in the mirror and just think is this really going to work. I think yea maybe I'll lose 25 pounds or so but will it really work, so that I don;t have to look and feel this way anymore. I just can;t see myself that way right now. I just keep thinking am I going to go through this and nothing happen and I'll just have stuff inside me. I don't know why I'm so discouraged it seems to work for most people that work it, but all I see is the failure part or the complication part. Something will happen or I'll just happen to fail again. Like my fate is to be fat. I can't stand the thought. I'm tearing up just thinking about it. Has anyone gone though this? Maybe this is normal, just maybe. Thanks for letting me vent.

Stepht04 - I so completely understand how you feel, and I think it's totally normal. It's a huge step, and will change the way you eat and relate to food. It's very frustrating sometimes, but I see the pounds coming off, and it's well worth it!

We've all been through the ups & downs of weight loss, and it gets to the point where it feels futile; nothing will work. WLS is a huge undertaking, and the reality is, weight can be gained no matter which procedure is chosen. As you've read all over the site, the band is a tool, and you have to work with it. And I'm telling you, if you DO work with it, the weight will come off. Ask yourself this.....if you don't go through with the surgery, where do you see yourself in another 2-3 years? Do you see yourself continuing to gain? If you stay right where you are, can you live with it?

I've had days when I felt like I was going to be out of control with food. It's scares the sh-t out of me, because I also have fears that after going through ALL of this, I might fail the band. Notice.....I said I might fail the band, not that the band would fail me. I'm not going to paint a picture of sunshine & roses....it's hard sometimes. But after SO many failed attempts at losing weight.....at this age, the weight is finally coming off.

FYI - I was scheduled for a gastric bypass, but freaked out a couple of weeks before the surgery. Talk about fear! My decision to go with the band (+ plication) was one I could live with. It is very scary to read of the complications people have, but that is far from the majority. There are thousands of successful band patients that don't participate in these online forums. And the ones who post of serious issues, are a small minority. Although, some of those posters want you to fear the worst band doom possible, the reality is, they are a small minority. And the beauty of the band is, it can be removed should something go terribly wrong.

I feel for you, and trust that you will come to the decision that is best for you.

[DELETE THIS ACCOUNT! 12,703]

What you're going through is totally normal. I know I was second guessing my decision right up until the time they wheeled me into the ER. I had failed so many times before that I just didn't believe this would actually work for me. I weighed over 400 pounds and was miserable. I couldn't picture myself any other way, either.

Now, I sit here recovering from another surgery. 3 days ago I had a major hernia repair, Tummy Tuck, and skin removal. I started this journey in a 7x or 8x shirt and right now I'm wearing a ladies size large. For the first time in a decade I'm not wearing a shirt that goes to my knees to cover my gut. When my boyfriend saw me his jaw literally dropped. He's been going on and on about how awesome I look and what a cute figure I have. My 18 year old daughter saw me and said "holy crap mom, you're skinny!!" All this and I am still very swollen and have drains in from surgery.

It's extremely surreal to lose over 200 pounds and now to be healing from this recent surgery- and none of it would have happened without my Lap Band.

Contrary to my own stinking thinking 200 pounds ago, I am not destined to be fat. You are not destined to be fat, either. You are destined for success and happiness. Believe that and believe in yourself.

Hang in there. We believe in you

[☠carolinagirl☠ 18,721]

I don't understand what's going on with me for the past couple of weeks I've been having second thoughts about getting this surgery. I look in the mirror and just think is this really going to work. I think yea maybe I'll lose 25 pounds or so but will it really work, so that I don;t have to look and feel this way anymore. I just can;t see myself that way right now. I just keep thinking am I going to go through this and nothing happen and I'll just have stuff inside me. I don't know why I'm so discouraged it seems to work for most people that work it, but all I see is the failure part or the complication part. Something will happen or I'll just happen to fail again. Like my fate is to be fat. I can't stand the thought. I'm tearing up just thinking about it. Has anyone gone though this? Maybe this is normal, just maybe. Thanks for letting me vent.

i read your post and all the comments and decided to answer differently...

i read your posts filled with i cant, what if this or that, and more can't

complications (that may or may not happen, its surgery-things happen) and on and on but you seems to forget something...read this part as i mean it with love and from someone who started with a large BMI

what if you can

what if you do

what if you are a success

what if nothing goes wrong and all goes right?

think about *that* and make yourself well

your the only one that can do it..so do it

best of luck

[dawalsh 919]

I can relate to every one of these posts and had serious doubts myself.

I want to see my grandchildren grow as well.

Yes, I worry about failure but I think that's normal.

The positive thing is I'm now off my diabetic medication. I'm looking forward to getting off all my meds.

I'm glad I was banded and eventhough I need a port revision I have full faith and I'm positive I made the right decision having this surgery!

Good luck to you!