Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

My husband wanted me to ask this.



Recommended Posts

I think the message boards are good support systems for most of us. My DH has never had a weight problem and neither has any of his immediate family so most of the time he doesn't know what I deal with regarding weight. He always thought I could just stop eating and the weight would fall off but it just doesn't happen that way.

I need the message boards and I still get in my 5 to 6 workouts during the week, cooking, cleaning and taking care of DH along with working 40+ hours a week. Also I manage property and we are trying to start a business. So my life is full and the message boards have only been a help.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Being the honest person I am, I must tell you about a conversation I had with my DH. I asked him if he thought I spend too much time on LBT and to my surprise he answered yes!! What a shock. ;) I guess I should take my own advice and spend more time talking to my DH.

I asked if he was jealous and he said no, but the house is messy. This is true. I have 2 preschool boys & they are challenging as adorable as they are. My DH actually loaded the dishwasher for me the other night. Here I thought he wanted sex, but he said he was tired of looking at it. I was really going to do the dishes after they all went to bed. :nervous

Well, I'm glad this thread was posted and I talked to my DH about it. I will try to be a better wife and keep a cleaner house....understand it's not a "filth" dirty, just needs to be picked up and such.

Thanks for allowing me this confession!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If nothing else the support boards tell you to get off your butt and exercise. No one on here that I know of has said don't exercise, eat more, and enjoy being fat. It's the exact opposite. Some People come here when they are hungry and type their feelings instead of going to the kitchen and eating tons of food. I am irritated just typing this so I am going to stop.

My mom always says, "Everything in moderation"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I will try to be a better wife and keep a cleaner house
Why not have your husband clean the house, so that you can spend time researching your soon to be new lifestyle?

My husband loves to see when I'm on here, and is always curious about what I'm saying or reading, because he figures it's all making me that much more informed, and will help me avoid problems, and/or be a little educated about what's going on when problems arise.

You average 2.5 posts per day. How can he say that's too much time?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

He does help out sometimes, but he usually gives me a break from the kids and takes care of them after he gets home. I can't tell you the last time I gave them a bath. He is a wonderful man and he would have never said anything if I hadn't asked. I'm glad he did though b/c I don't want him to hold things in like that. I want to make him happy. He is the farthest thing from controlling. He knows that doesn't work with me. I'm way too independent. He does support be being on here since he will be getting the band too. We are learning together. I tell him what I learn at LBT. I'll just have to dig deeper to find the real reason he feels like that way.

With that said, we did have a fun exchange last night:

DH: Are you going to wash my shirt for church?

3L: When I get done with my LBT site (I was in the chair and not near the computer...just sarcastic humor)

DH: I'll throw that computer out.

3L: I DARE you!

DH: Don't dare me, I'll do it.

3L: Would you rather be right or be happy?

DH: Right....wait, I want to be happy.

CASE CLOSED!! None of this was serious....we do have a fun relationship and enjoy the exchange. Keeps us on our toes. Boy, I do love this man!! :biggrin1:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Absolutely Sarah!

I have found myself typing when I am hungry and just reading some of the experiences on here have stopped me from over eating. Oh, by the way mother knows best. Everything in moderation is the key to life, that and a little variety!

Sunflower:)

Banded 6-14-05

Tiajuana

Dr. Huacuz

started at 267

now 249

only 18lbs in 9 1/2 months but still encouraged by you guys!:rolleyes:

7 fills presently at 8cc

need to get my impulses in control!:help:

I am definately in the slow loser club! my present goal is to get to 230 by May :party: Gosh now I am totally encouraged by myself!:clap2:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hear, Hear!! Once again, Kristin, you tooks the words right off of my screen!!!

~cheri

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think it's all how the user themselves decides to use these boards. If you limit your time on them and make your life a priority instead of lurking nearly 24 hours a day, then how's that supposed to decrease your activity? These forums have helped me to become very comfortable with my life and my decision to become banded. I don't think I would be as knowlegeable or as comfortable with my body and actions regarding my body without these board. But I have to make sure that I don't get immersed so deeply that I forget about my family and myself. I have let some housework go, but isn't that what family is for? :guess As for my excercise........I do that when I wake in the morning, before I go to work. Priorities.

On the other hand, I think the possibility is there that some individuals CAN become almost addicted to these support forums and message boards and instead of doing active things they sit clicking or typing away.

It's the user's responsibility, not the moderator or the provider of the message boards.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Actually I think there's something in that. I have made a concerted effort to not be on the computer as much, I used to spend hours a day on here. And everytime I find myself sitting on the couch with a coffee I tell myself I'm "acting fat" and I get up and go and do something, like clean the bathroom or vacuum the floor.

I ration my computer time now, helped by the fact that our modem blew out and I havent had internet access for about two weeks. I'm here now because I'm actually completing a maths assignment due at the end of the week, lol. Its very boring, hence quick visits elsewhere.

But internet boards are fun and a good way of connecting with others in your situation. I've made lifelong real friendships with people I see several times a mont on my main home on the net, basically an online mothers' group. They're more than worthwhile just not for hours and hours.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think that your husband needs to realize that if people weren't at YOUR support forum, they'd be at some other forum.

Support forums don't make me sit at a computer any more than anything else. Sitting at a computer all day pays my bills. When I get home from work, I sit down at my computer most nights. I may or may not visit LBT, but I'm still at my computer.

No, I have not been exersizing lately, but sitting at my computer is not the reason I choose not to exersize... it just happens to be what I do, when I choose not to exersize, lol.

I would be lost without a support forum for the band. I don't actually post new threads for band related advice very often, but I know the forum is here if I need it, and just talking with people who really KNOW what I am going through helps alot.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

LMAO, ROFLLLLL!

This thread had me cracking up. Mind you, this is not justification, this is strictly how I am answering the question.

Here's a typical day for me:

Computer stays on all day ( I own a small Medical Consulting Firm and my desk and computer is my money maker. I bring home most of the bacon here. Trueness, probably why I got so overweight. Just running the business, sitting all day and trying to do everything myself.)

I keep the forum up now, since I discovered it. I am a new bandster and am extremely curious, happy and interested in all of my fellow bandsters experiences, etc. Keeps me motivated, shows me what others are doing right and wrong.

I run my household, i.e., cook, clean, wash clothes (daily), kids (need I say more?)

I make a 100% positive effort to work out every day now. Been that way for over 1 month. I put in 1 - 3 hours of workout each day. Truth is, once I realized my faults and woke up, or once I got the calling, I have been on the move.

Remember this..... everything...in moderation. (get it? lol)

food - in moderation

Computer - in moderation

Nagging - in moderation ;)

Exercise - not in moderation (only exception to the rule)

Sex - errmmmm

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with Anwyn...we need this support as much as we need exercise. Having said that, I know I spend time on here so that it gets my mind off food as well as for learning more about the band lifestyle and reciving/giving support. Everyone uses it as it fits their needs and lifestyle...but I probably wouldn't be exercising during that time if I quit this, either.

Emily

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can understand his point (is he a skinny guy like my dh?)... Many people have ways to unwind. Some, it is with the PC, others with the TV or reading. All of those ways are pretty physically inactive (except when I read while on my exercise bike!) And they can be bad for you if you spend too much time a day doing them.

But unlike TV watching, being part of a support group can be very healthy.

Personally, I am on my PC all day for my job. I get a few minutes here and there to post and read messages. Once I leave work, I rarely turn my PC on. So total, I probably spend 15-20 minutes a day online...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×