on your mark get set go o wait a min i dont have a date yet

[ErinSue2000 48]

My doc office told me the other day I will be banded as little as 3 weeks which makes it feb 6th! My husband told me tonight that he is going to miss me! Not sure what to make of that! My husband has also read up on the lapband and I think he has read a little to much to be honest! He read an article on the net about marriage after weight loss surgery and it stated divorce rates are high! Grr really! I wish each and everyone of you good luck with your journey! God bless!

[MandaMom23 684]

Aww, I'm sure your husband will LOVE the new you (and tell him to stop reading about that negative stuff, and to find something positive to read )!

Hopefully you'll get your official surgery date soon! Good luck to you and keep us updated.

[parisshel 1,892]

My boyfriend also said the same thing...he had heard from a colleague (who got sleeved) that 85% of successful WLS patients leave their partner. That colleague even said something like "You know she'll leave you after this!" or something equally inane.

I told my boyfriend that if I did ever leave, it would have nothing to do with weight, but rather the fact he never clears his plate from the table.

[general_antiope 189]

It's true that people who lose a lot of weight end their marriages. But there are so many reasons for that. The common denominator is that the shrinking person is having a life altering experience that is making them grow. If your partner doesn't grow with you or grows in the opposite direction, the shrinking person has less tolerance for misery and pain.

I got divorced from my first husband after I lost my weight with my first band. I stayed in that relationship for 12 years trying to make it work. Being a normal sized woman made me feel less inclined to deal with his BS when there were more people out there and I had new confidence. I tried to hold on to my marriage, we went to counseling. He refused to keep going and said he didn't care that I felt unhappy with our relationship and he had no intention if changing.

I'm now remarried and just had my first baby at 37. I love my life!!!

[parisshel 1,892]

My sense is that my relationship will fall into the "at risk" category, based on the reasons kateeryn cites. My BF has zero interest in leading a healthy, active life, and this is even more irritating because he had a heart attack at age 38. You'd think he'd want to get himself into the best shape ever...but the further out he gets from that heart attack, the less its impact on him and the more he just lazes about, continues to eat poorly and rely on his medications to "combat" the damage his eating and inactivity have done.

My own burden of fat made me reluctant to encourage him to live a better life--I looked at this as the pot calling the kettle black-- but I predict that my return to an active, healthy lifestyle will see us having some major issues.

Still, it isn't worth staying fat to keep the relationship at status quo, right?

[general_antiope 189]

My sense is that my relationship will fall into the "at risk" category, based on the reasons kateeryn cites. My BF has zero interest in leading a healthy, active life, and this is even more irritating because he had a heart attack at age 38. You'd think he'd want to get himself into the best shape ever...but the further out he gets from that heart attack, the less its impact on him and the more he just lazes about, continues to eat poorly and rely on his medications to "combat" the damage his eating and inactivity have done.

My own burden of fat made me reluctant to encourage him to live a better life--I looked at this as the pot calling the kettle black-- but I predict that my return to an active, healthy lifestyle will see us having some major issues.

Still, it isn't worth staying fat to keep the relationship at status quo, right?

No, it's not worth it! I can't believe how huge my world got once I got smaller I gained weight from a broken band and pregnancy and I HATE being this heavy!! I can't believe I lived with it so long. But I love eating more, and can't control my hunger and food choices on my own the way I can with the band. Cannot get re-banded fast enough!!

[ErinSue2000 48]

My husband and and I have set down and have had a nice long chat at 5 am this morning before he left for work. About how we can make this hole experence a family event! Our son who is 10 is becomeing chubby do to are love of food so we have decided that the hole family is getting a membership to the ymca not just me! Which is a wonderful idea if you ask me! My husband is currently about 50 pounds overweight and my son is a little chubby even thoug he is 5 ft 3 at the age of 10! We also talked about going to a little bit of counsuling to help him and better understand each other during this process! My husband has had to handle a lot in his life and do to this he has fears of people leaving him! He supports me in this 100%! Matter of fact I told him he didn't have to take of work for my next appt and I was put in my place pretty fast lol! Enjoy your day everybody!