Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Keeping it a secret



Recommended Posts

Have anyone had the lapband and kept it a secret from nosey co workers? How did you go about doing this and is it easy to be intimate without you partner feeling the port?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi there. You absolutely can keep it from nosey coworkers. I have told a couple in my immediate area but there are other nosey ones (in HR and payroll of all things) that it is none of their business. People have noticed me losing weight and I just say I am watching what I'm eating (which is a factual statement). You don't need to tell anyone that you don't want to know. This is your journey and your life, taking control of how you wish to move forward is good for you (whether you wish to share or not is your decision).

I am very happy for you and truly, no one that I don't want to know knows. They have noticed the weight loss. Also, I was in a couple lunch situations where someone questioned why I was eating so slow. I told her I wanted to enjoy my lunch and that I wasn't feeling all that well (which I actually wasn't) and that was it.

Good luck on your journey and I wish you much success.

As for being intimate. I am still 224 lbs, so still another almost 100 lbs to lose (gulp) but I have lost 60 lbs already and don't notice it. All I have noticed is an improved sex life as I have more confidence, not as tired, and physically more able. ;-)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with the above post. I haven't been banded yet and I'm still chosing who I'm opening up to about this. Obviously, I'm excited for this life changing journey to start and I want to scream it to the world, but at the same time, this is also a very personal matter. I know that judgments will still come and I don't think everyone needs to know that I've decided to do this.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi there. You absolutely can keep it from nosey coworkers. I have told a couple in my immediate area but there are other nosey ones (in HR and payroll of all things) that it is none of their business. People have noticed me losing weight and I just say I am watching what I'm eating (which is a factual statement). You don't need to tell anyone that you don't want to know. This is your journey and your life' date=' taking control of how you wish to move forward is good for you (whether you wish to share or not is your decision).

I am very happy for you and truly, no one that I don't want to know knows. They have noticed the weight loss. Also, I was in a couple lunch situations where someone questioned why I was eating so slow. I told her I wanted to enjoy my lunch and that I wasn't feeling all that well (which I actually wasn't) and that was it.

Good luck on your journey and I wish you much success.

As for being intimate. I am still 224 lbs, so still another almost 100 lbs to lose (gulp) but I have lost 60 lbs already and don't notice it. All I have noticed is an improved sex life as I have more confidence, not as tired, and physically more able. ;-)[/quote']

Thank you dawn. After reading your advise, I feeling better about my decision. I feel motivate in so many ways. I'm currently 220 now and can't wait to get banded. Good luck to u as well! Happy banding!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with the above post. I haven't been banded yet and I'm still chosing who I'm opening up to about this. Obviously' date=' I'm excited for this life changing journey to start and I want to scream it to the world, but at the same time, this is also a very personal matter. I know that judgments will still come and I don't think everyone needs to know that I've decided to do this.[/quote']

I know people will judge me and its hard now trying to explain myself to people. I know what u mean. I want to scream! This is going to be so cool. I can't wait to see what it feel like to be lighter

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Girl I have not been banded yet will be Tuesday the 18. Right around the corner and far as I concerned I will not be sharing with nosy people. They will have their own assumption any way. I told some of my family not all of them even just a few. But it is my and your business because the lap band is not a miracle pill you still have to exercise more and eat right. I will be offering any information because we do not owe them any explanations. I cannot wait til Tuesday and by the way you have done great on your weight loss. Congratulations.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Congrats!! I hope soon I will be able to say my date. I'm still working out some insurance issues. I'm changing insurances so hopefully this one is better. I know it's covers but I have to pay 20% plus my 1,000 deductible. I wonder if the 20 % will be billed later or will that have to be paid first. Regardless I am here to stay!!! Keep me posted in your progress. I'm rooting for u girl!!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Congrats!! I hope soon I will be able to say my date. I'm still working out some insurance issues. I'm changing insurances so hopefully this one is better. I know it's covers but I have to pay 20% plus my 1,000 deductible. I wonder if the 20 % will be billed later or will that have to be paid first. Regardless I am here to stay!!! Keep me posted in your progress. I'm rooting for u girl!!!!

Once you get your insurance squared away, ask your surgeon how the billing will work. My insurance covered most of it but I was a bit taken aback when his office called the week before and said his bill needed to be paid before surgery. Thankfully it was only a few hundred dollars so I was able to manage, was just surprised.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Telling or not telling people is a personal decision. I did t tell anyone at work but I told people I knew personally outside of work if it came up. Once I had lost about 100 lbs people at work started asking so I wasn't going to lie... It was no big deal. And now.... I would shout it from the mountain tops!!

....as for you other question about the port.... It's never been an issue for me during intimacy. If one position hurts it...change things up a bit.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Have anyone had the lapband and kept it a secret from nosey co workers? How did you go about doing this and is it easy to be intimate without you partner feeling the port?

some of mine know and some dont

you tell whom you want too..def nothing to be ashamed of.

as far as the intimate...if it hurt, i switched positions..(newly banded)..at my highest weight, you couldnt feel it, but now at 88 down, its a hard spot on but i view

it as my life saver.........super proud :)

bee well

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The reason I don't want to tell anyone because unfortunately everyone is not always a cheerleader. I have had people tell me I didn't need to do what I did, I have had people look at me like I was crazy. It seemed as long as iwas the fattest chick in the room everyone was fine. Later down the line if I want to tell I will but it is not the lapband alone that has caused the weight loss.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Telling or not telling people is a personal decision. I did t tell anyone at work but I told people I knew personally outside of work if it came up. Once I had lost about 100 lbs people at work started asking so I wasn't going to lie... It was no big deal. And now.... I would shout it from the mountain tops!!

....as for you other question about the port.... It's never been an issue for me during intimacy. If one position hurts it...change things up a bit.

Something to put on my question list. Thank u.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The reason I don't want to tell anyone because unfortunately everyone is not always a cheerleader. I have had people tell me I didn't need to do what I did' date=' I have had people look at me like I was crazy. It seemed as long as iwas the fattest chick in the room everyone was fine. Later down the line if I want to tell I will but it is not the lapband alone that has caused the weight loss.[/quote']

That's exactly why I don't want to tell people. You hot it on the head! As long as I'm the fattest chick everyone is supportive but the day I annoyed that I was changing my life style. I got heat from both co workers family and friends. I know how hard I'm going to have to work to lose weight. The band is just my aide. I don't want people to say its the only reason I'm down in weight

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The reason I don't want to tell anyone because unfortunately everyone is not always a cheerleader. I have had people tell me I didn't need to do what I did, I have had people look at me like I was crazy. It seemed as long as iwas the fattest chick in the room everyone was fine. Later down the line if I want to tell I will but it is not the lapband alone that has caused the weight loss.

I am going to give you some advise from someone who spent the majority of her life worried about what others think...,

About 18 years ago I went against my gut feeling and did something which was the more popular choice among my friends and co workers. It wasn't illegal or immoral or anything...just that I listened to them instead of me. I wont clutter this post with the details but it was the wrong choice. I made a decision after I picked myself up and put my life back together .... Unless someone is paying my bills their opinion makes no difference.. I can take it under consideration but they cannot hurt my feelings or make me second guess myself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow that's the attitude I need to let myself have. I do always care about what people think and say. I'm going to keep that in mind the next time someone tries to give me negative advise. When I get banded its going to be a new me

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×