Family Sometimes Makes Me Feel Worse...

[☠carolinagirl☠ 18,721]

Hi fellow lap bandits! I am so frustrated! To date I lost 50lbs. My Aunts best friend lost 125 and she is older than me, has no job and works out almost everyday. She forgets she tells me these things!! So, we were at her Mothers wake and she starts telling me and my Mom that I am doing everything wrong and I should have lost way more by now. That she has not worked out or tried to diet and lost all the weight. Its really frustrating and if I say something, I will be in A LOT of trouble!! I know I need help getting back on track but it is also very upsetting being told every other day how horrible of a job I'm doing. I had no support before surgery, I especially don't want the hassle now!!

what you have lost is great and it works for you.

so what if you didnt loose what they did or me or elvis or whomever...the point is you are loosing for YOU....always amazes me that if a person is doing well (as you are) a negative nellie or a debbie downer can swoosh in and take all those good feelings away.

you keep doing what you are doing.

as those who (claim they are not exercising or watchig their weight) will eventually start gaining and then what??.....will see you on the right track and being outstanding.

hang in there

[JustineD06 5]

I Love groupon!!! lol.. Your spirits seem a lot brighter! Happy to see that! wooo 2 lbs right on track hun! I totally busted this past week.. now I know why I shouldn't drink.. you get that i dont care attitude. My bf left for a week.. and I felt like a teenager in a house by herself while your parents are on vacation lol.. so.. shame on me.. I'm owning up to it. don't even wanna say how much I gained back.. im ashamed .. but I am right back on track! New year.. <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />

Thanks! Sometimes you need that drink for yourself! Def changed my attitude now! Its for me in the end!!

[JustineD06 5]

Thank you!! I know I ate and could have said no but that a disgrace in my family! We are traditionally set in many ways. Less macaroni is killing me!! LOL

[JustineD06 5]

what you have lost is great and it works for you.

so what if you didnt loose what they did or me or elvis or whomever...the point is you are loosing for YOU....always amazes me that if a person is doing well (as you are) a negative nellie or a debbie downer can swoosh in and take all those good feelings away.

you keep doing what you are doing.

as those who (claim they are not exercising or watchig their weight) will eventually start gaining and then what??.....will see you on the right track and being outstanding.

hang in there

It was def easy to get down on myself! Its like everyone "knows best" because they had it done. I say now that everyone is different! We will do it on our own!! Just because I am younger doesn't mean I don't know anything!! New attitude this year!

[HolleyJane 16]

Hi fellow lap bandits! I am so frustrated! To date I lost 50lbs. My Aunts best friend lost 125 and she is older than me, has no job and works out almost everyday. She forgets she tells me these things!! So, we were at her Mothers wake and she starts telling me and my Mom that I am doing everything wrong and I should have lost way more by now. That she has not worked out or tried to diet and lost all the weight. Its really frustrating and if I say something, I will be in A LOT of trouble!! I know I need help getting back on track but it is also very upsetting being told every other day how horrible of a job I'm doing. I had no support before surgery, I especially don't want the hassle now!!

MsJustine,

I think what you're going through is very normal. Some people (including myself) gain weight because they "eat their feelings." In other words, instead of speaking up and possibly having a confrontation, we might go eat something in frustration, anger, or sadness. I'm not saying that's your issue, but if I were you, I would pull her aside and tell her very non-confrontantionally that her comments are hurting your feelings. She may honestly have no idea how much she's affecting you, and this could help her see what she's doing. If, however, she's doing it on purpose, at least its letting her know that you're not going to let her hurt you anymore. It's a win-win for you. I know it might be hard, especially with family, which is why I would do it very carefully and diplomatically, but also clearly: you are being hurt. You can't stop her from talking or being insensitive, but you can stop her from hurting you by setting your own boundary with her.

Just my opinion--I struggle a lot with letting other people's insenstivity hurt me!