Journey Into My New Life

[donna12 742]

Well, where do I begin! For starters my new birthday began June 13th, 2012 when I was banded and I thank my surgeon and God everyday for saving my life because I was eating my way to a slow death, literally. For the past 3 years I've gone thru a separation and divorce after being married for 25 yrs and boy was it heartbreaking and depressing. I was in a deep depression and threw myself into a feeding frenzy. At the time I lived alone and at night I would sit and watch TV and eat and eat and eat, anything. I was out of control and getting bigger by the day each day and knew it but didn't care. How could someone you loved for so many years have this affect on you I wondered but he did. I live in a small town of 45,000 and it's nothing to see him out in a restaurant with his "new" woman that he left me for and yes she is skinny for those of you wondering. Anyway, I got out of my funk and in May of '12 I picked myself up and went to a Lap Band seminar and let me tell you if the surgeon would have stayed late that night and done the surgery I was ready...lol. I called the next day and got a letter from my physician, got an appt witht the surgeon, called my ins. company (they covered it and since my BMI was over 50 I didn't have to do a 6 months diet) so I was well on my way to being banded. within a few short weeks I was being wheeled into a holding room and being prepped. Some friends came to the hospital that morning at 5:30 and prayed with me, had my mom with me and I was set to go. Surgery went well and came home same day. First few days were to put it bluntly HELL! Painful, I threw up a lot but come to find out it was all from the pain meds and Constipation, go figure! Now after being banded 4 months and 2 weeks things are settling in. I'm still learning, oh yes, I'm still learning my band and how to eat and chew. Had my spells of being stuck several times, not pretty! One lasted 5 hrs, broccoli, never again!!! I think I currently have 5.5cc's in and eat about every 4 to 5 hrs or 3 times a day. My only weakness, sweets. I currently live with my mom and she keeps candy and Cookies around. Not to tempt me, please don't speak bad of her. I can limit myself to one or two pcs of candy a day or one cookie a day but the fact remains it's still there. She is my accountability, when I want to graze she reminds me, "you don't need that" or "it's too late to be eating" and I'm thankful. Though my weight loss may be slower than some of you on here, I'm down 39 lbs so far, I'm proud of that, it's coming off slow and slower now than before like right after surgery. I'm not up to exercising yet, just don't have the energy. I seem to feel zapped all of the time. I plan on calling my physician this week and seeing if he will order a blood test to check my Ferritin levels since I am always tired and fatigued and always stay cold.

For my life right now, I'd do this all over again in a heartbeat. My only regret, is that I didn't do it years ago. I've go to many things I want to accomplish yet only as a healthy and thinner me. Heck who knows maybe even get remarried some day. Ha. This forum is wonderful, lots of you have been great support to me in times of need and I thank you!

Taking back my life!

Donna

[FallonB 102]

Well' date=' where do I begin! For starters my new birthday began June 13th, 2012 when I was banded and I thank my surgeon and God everyday for saving my life because I was eating my way to a slow death, literally. For the past 3 years I've gone thru a separation and divorce after being married for 25 yrs and boy was it heartbreaking and depressing. I was in a deep depression and threw myself into a feeding frenzy. At the time I lived alone and at night I would sit and watch TV and eat and eat and eat, anything. I was out of control and getting bigger by the day each day and knew it but didn't care. How could someone you loved for so many years have this affect on you I wondered but he did. I live in a small town of 45,000 and it's nothing to see him out in a restaurant with his "new" woman that he left me for and yes she is skinny for those of you wondering. Anyway, I got out of my funk and in May of '12 I picked myself up and went to a Lap Band seminar and let me tell you if the surgeon would have stayed late that night and done the surgery I was ready...lol. I called the next day and got a letter from my physician, got an appt witht the surgeon, called my ins. company (they covered it and since my BMI was over 50 I didn't have to do a 6 months diet) so I was well on my way to being banded. within a few short weeks I was being wheeled into a holding room and being prepped. Some friends came to the hospital that morning at 5:30 and prayed with me, had my mom with me and I was set to go. Surgery went well and came home same day. First few days were to put it bluntly HELL! Painful, I threw up a lot but come to find out it was all from the pain meds and Constipation, go figure! Now after being banded 4 months and 2 weeks things are settling in. I'm still learning, oh yes, I'm still learning my band and how to eat and chew. Had my spells of being stuck several times, not pretty! One lasted 5 hrs, broccoli, never again!!! I think I currently have 5.5cc's in and eat about every 4 to 5 hrs or 3 times a day. My only weakness, sweets. I currently live with my mom and she keeps candy and Cookies around. Not to tempt me, please don't speak bad of her. I can limit myself to one or two pcs of candy a day or one cookie a day but the fact remains it's still there. She is my accountability, when I want to graze she reminds me, "you don't need that" or "it's too late to be eating" and I'm thankful. Though my weight loss may be slower than some of you on here, I'm down 39 lbs so far, I'm proud of that, it's coming off slow and slower now than before like right after surgery. I'm not up to exercising yet, just don't have the energy. I seem to feel zapped all of the time. I plan on calling my physician this week and seeing if he will order a blood test to check my Ferritin levels since I am always tired and fatigued and always stay cold.

For my life right now, I'd do this all over again in a heartbeat. My only regret, is that I didn't do it years ago. I've go to many things I want to accomplish yet only as a healthy and thinner me. Heck who knows maybe even get remarried some day. Ha. This forum is wonderful, lots of you have been great support to me in times of need and I thank you!

Taking back my life!

Donna[/quote']

I'm going through a divorce right now, it's been going on for coming up on a year, separated for longer. It lasted no where near as long as yours. My split was easy, as I was so beyond ready for it to be over because he was emotionally abusive and controlling, then I realized that I was developing feelings for my best friend... Who I've been dating for almost a year and happier than ever! Lol, funny how those things happen. And no, I didn't cheat, I left and filed before anything happened.

Anyways, I can't imagine how hard that has to be on you! I'm so sorry! But! I'm glad that you're doing better. Slow weight loss is still a loss! You've lost more weight than my almost 3 year old (she's 30lbs.) It may not seem like much, but come haul her around then we'll talk about that not being much! Lol. So good for you!

Now get your butt in gear and prepare to go show that ex of yours what he lost!

Man, I can't wait... I'm going to make it a point to bump into my ex when I'm smaller. I'm gunna be a hot little thing hanging off the arm of a REAL man and I hope it drives my ex nuts!

xx

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using LapBandTalk

[donna12 742]

you are too funny! Thanks. Yes, it will be funny to bump into him in about a year from now when I'm down 100 lbs and show him!!! Do I miss him, yes, but I miss being having that "person" in the house. I must add that I watched him become an alcoholic the last 4 yrs of our marriage and he is still to this day. 2 yrs ago he got a DUI and just this past Feb got arrested for public intoxication, so he has gone downhill. Lost a corporate job over his drinking. With that being said, I'm glad its over from that aspect. He was never abusive, just was out drinking every night and it led to an affair which devastated me. I didn't have the surgery to get skinny and show him by no means, I was tired of feeling sick and tired all of the time and knew something had to change or I was going to die! I watched my dad die of heart disease from early obesity, his latter yrs he had lost his weight on his own but I didn't have the will power. I treat this Lap Band as a tool to help me. And your 3 yr old, wow, I doubt very seriously if I could haul her around, lol. Heck a sack of potatoes is hard enough, ha ha ha.

[FallonB 102]

you are too funny! Thanks. Yes' date=' it will be funny to bump into him in about a year from now when I'm down 100 lbs and show him!!! Do I miss him, yes, but I miss being having that "person" in the house. I must add that I watched him become an alcoholic the last 4 yrs of our marriage and he is still to this day. 2 yrs ago he got a DUI and just this past Feb got arrested for public intoxication, so he has gone downhill. Lost a corporate job over his drinking. With that being said, I'm glad its over from that aspect. He was never abusive, just was out drinking every night and it led to an affair which devastated me. I didn't have the surgery to get skinny and show him by no means, I was tired of feeling sick and tired all of the time and knew something had to change or I was going to die! I watched my dad die of heart disease from early obesity, his latter yrs he had lost his weight on his own but I didn't have the will power. I treat this Lap Band as a tool to help me. And your 3 yr old, wow, I doubt very seriously if I could haul her around, lol. Heck a sack of potatoes is hard enough, ha ha ha.[/quote']

Oh wow. How sad. My ex step dad was an alcoholic, miserable thing to be around especially when they won't let you help them. =( Hopefully he decides to make better decisions as well... before it's too late! And I'm sure you didn't get it to show him! Lol! That just kinda motivates me. Mine was a hard core body builder (3+ hours at the gym. Daily.), so there were some comments after I had my daughter. Fuel. I like proving people wrong. Lol.

I'm so sorry about your daddy! I pray that you get to a healthy weight before anything too bad or irreversible sets in! Make him proud! =)

I'm off to try to sleep now. It's way past my bedtime but I'm addicted to Pinning on Pinterest right now! So many great holiday ideas! Ahhh!

Sweet dreams and skinny jeans, my friend! Goodnight!

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using LapBandTalk

[dee257 1,516]

sending hugs...Im sorry for you...being married 35 yrs here I couldnt imagine how you cope ..God Bless you.....

[Wgbem 138]

You ladies are strong and should just continue to look forward to the future. Our bands are going to help us build a new life that will give us the strength and will power. Please gang in there. We are here for you!

[♕ajtexas♕ 3,771]

Congrats on the weight loss so far. Slow and steady, that's the way to do it. You have started a new chapter in the book of life. Hold your head high, you are a beautiful person and you deserve to be happy.

I too love sweets, I have them occasionally. When I do I log them in my food journal. To me, this is not a diet it is a lifestyle that we have to live for the rest of our lives, so a treat is deserved. And bless your mom for supporting you through this.

Good luck on your journey. It sounds like you are right on track.

[Maddysgram 6,159]

Donna you are a beautiful woman inside & out. I have no doubt that God will bring someone into your life, that will make ex look like chopped liver.

Congratulations on your success so far!

We're in this together sister!

[lozjacko 20]

Thanks for sharing your story!! I'm sorry to hear about your relationship!!

Life does throw us some curve balls that just really aren't fair. That's what makes us stronger.

Hope this doesn't come across the wrong way.. But maybe he has done you a favor. It's allowed you to step back and look at your life and now you are making the steps towards a happier and healthier life for you and you can start putting you first. I mean this in the nicest possible way.

I'm just considering lap band surgery now. I have my appt in 2 weeks to see a surgeon and hopefully I can have it done and

feel better in myself too. I have 2 gorgeous little kids and I want to be a healthier mum. I want to look and feel soo much better.

I would like to lose 40 kgs (88lbs) my embarrassment is that I hate my photo being taken because i feel so fat when i see the photo's. So there are very little of me with my kids and that breaks my heart. Some may think its silly.

I wish you all the best for your journey and hopefully I will have an inspiring story like yours! Thanks.

[donna12 742]

thank you all so very much for your kind words and words of encouragement. To Lozjacko, yes in some way maybe he did do me a favor in leaving me with him being an alcoholic. I had gotten to the point of not handling it very well emotionally. The late nights of his drinking, not knowing whether he would come home at all or whether he had had an accident and was dead, the worrying so yes, it is a relief. The hardest part for me, well, we were high school sweethearts and I still love that person, but he isn't that person any longer, he's changed. If only I could go back about 8 yrs...I came across my video camera today that had a video of Christmas '08, our last Christmas together, happier times, we were laughing, extended family was in it, it was a good trip down memory lane but sad. I pray every night that he seek help in the Lord and come to his senses that he realizes he needs help with his drinking. Such a waste. He's college educated, had a very important corporate job that he lost, its just sad. Now is the time for me. Me to get healthy and instead of getting my big girl panties on as they say, I'm gona get my skinny girl panties on someday...ha Here's to ya'll.

[jmont 13]

Donna, you are doing so well! It took me a year to reach my goal weight so slow is better! I live in Australia and we have very high rates of divorce with lapband patients 75% which is high! I think it has to do with the confidence you gain through this process and then you realise you have been living with an enabler!! If you are large when you get married then you lose weight our partners don't know how to handle it! I have been married 23 yrs and my husband has stuck by me through it all! He knows when I'm having my bad band days, he knows when I need an adjustment because I'm eating way too much! I love that he supports me! I know you will also find happiness again as you are already on the right path!! Your doing a great job keep it up! Relax and enjoy your journey! Because you are worth it!

[donna12 742]

Donna, you are doing so well! It took me a year to reach my goal weight so slow is better! I live in Australia and we have very high rates of divorce with lapband patients 75% which is high! I think it has to do with the confidence you gain through this process and then you realise you have been living with an enabler!! If you are large when you get married then you lose weight our partners don't know how to handle it! I have been married 23 yrs and my husband has stuck by me through it all! He knows when I'm having my bad band days, he knows when I need an adjustment because I'm eating way too much! I love that he supports me! I know you will also find happiness again as you are already on the right path!! Your doing a great job keep it up! Relax and enjoy your journey! Because you are worth it!

Thank you so much for your kind words and your words of encouragement. It means the world to me for people like you to take the time and tell me stories like this and to also have faith in me. thank you again.

God Bless

Donna