New To Lbt - 4 Months Post Op

[Amber_banded052312 8]

Hello All!

Thanks for taking the time to read. I pretty much wrote my story down in the my "story" on my profile, but long story short .. here I am.

I started this Lap-Band journey sincerely on April 30, 2012. I was tired of being diabetic and I was tired of being sick and tired of being sick and tired. Being a single mom to a rambunctious 3 year old boy is rough stuff. Trying to find the time and energy to get to they gym, much less the money to do it is even more rough. Struggling to make ends meet, I finally had to decide that this was a road I needed to take. I needed to get off my butt and put some forward motion to this weight loss journey.

I have been overweight since my childhood. Being the hefty kid was hard. Being teased because my clothes were fitting funny caused me lots of grief and helped to create this self consciousness and self-esteem issues I still have today.

I got teased in middle school and was even called a blimp by the guy that I had a crush on. It was heart breaking. I tried several fad diets with little to no success.

I went into high school being 250 lbs and wearing a size 24. By the time I graduated I had maintained that size 24, but had gained another 30 lbs. Throughout the years after high school I maintained the ability to stay in my size 24 but did have a time when I got to a size 26. It was then that I started really getting to the gym and working on it because I refused to be a size 26.

I went from 340 lbs to 305 working out with a trainer and maxing out my credit card. It was at that point that lack of condom and switching birth control pills = getting pregnant. My miracle baby was conceived. Now I know how you get pregnant. But, my child really is a miracle child. I was on the pill for 15 years and the ONE time that he didn't put on a condom and he used to pull out method and we figured that most of all of it ended up on the outside, is the time that I got pregnant.

I gained that weight back during my pregnancy but was able to lose it again after having my son.

Stress from having to work and being a single mom helped my weight to keep fluctuating higher, but it was ultimately the loss of my older sister (38) and my mother (55) within three weeks of each other that lead me to gain to be the maximum amount of weight I had ever been. I was now a diabetic with a small child and depression. I went from being the middle child to the oldest and then being the responsible one all in one foul swoop. Hard pill to swallow. I ballooned up to 355. I didn't even realize it. I was on depression medicine and didn't even "feel" anything. food wasn't a comfort, yet it was. It was my friend and my foe.

So, I went to a free consultation. Got all the details. Decided that I would pay out of pocket for the lab work and physical. Figured the worst that could happen is that I would be out of $150. Right!??!

With insurance having a direct exclusion to weight loss surgery, it was time to figure out how I was going to make this happen. I got denied immediately for financing of the entire surgery, but was told if I could come up with $4288, that I could get financed for the balance of $5500. So, I asked my boss (I've worked at the same company since 1999) to help. They ended up giving me a bonus of the $4288 so I could get the surgery. They believed enough in me to help me get to where I needed to be financially. The $5500 is financed for 2 years. Less than a car and for the better of myself mentally, physically and emotionally. Well worth it!

I started at 355lbs on April 30th. Lost 12lbs before surgery. So on surgery day I weighed in at 343lbs. It was a rough couple of weeks feeling like I was starving because I wasn't eating. I was on the liquid diet for 2 weeks. WHO DOES THAT? is all I kept asking myself. The inner fat girl wanted some food. How in the world and why in the world did I do this to myself!??!

After the first fill of 1cc I still felt no change. The second fill of 1cc .. still felt no change. I went to a support meeting and expressed my woes and the NP told me to call her and she would get me in since it had been 2 weeks since my last fill. That I didn't have to wait a full month (which depending on the way the weeks work in a month could be 4 or 5 weeks) between fills. I got a fill of 1cc and I started noticing a difference, but the hunger was still there every other hour. So I went another 2 weeks and this time a different lady only gave me .3cc of fill. I started to feel defeated because it felt like someone else controlled the fate of my success. Yet, it was just enough tightness to get me through yet still had in between hunger and meals were still at 1-2 cups of food per meal. I wasn't eating slow enough. I wasn't measuring right. I wasn't using the timer they gave me at my first post op visit.

I have to admit I have the tools, yet still unsure of how to use them, but this is a work in progress and well I realize I didn't gain all this weight over night, so I don't expect it to go away over night.

I got a fill of .5 cc on the next visit, but alas it was too much and I got chicken stuck. I chewed the mess out of that chicken before I swallowed and since surgery I haven't fully had the ability to regurgitate. I guess I slime. Best I can call it. I don't bring up food. I bring up spit that is really thick. Sorry to be so graphic. But, needless to say, because I had "choked on the chicken" I made the band and pouch angry and I wasn't able to eat. I lost 4lbs and those were a hard 4 lbs since I felt like I was starving. I called and they told me to come in. I cried. I felt like I was being taken back to square 1. They took out .5cc. I was able to get Fluid through, but because it was irritated and angry, it was just best to take out some Fluid and let things calm down. Two weeks later (although my appointment was set for a month later (5 weeks to be exact) I went back in because I felt like I was again starving. Eating left and right. The right portions, but it wasn't lasting. So I got a fill of .5cc. The NP that was there that day made me feel like doodoo. She told me that it wasn't protocol and that I wasn't supposed to come in but once a month and yada yada yada. She went ahead and gave me the .5cc, but she griped about it. She couldn't get the port and after digging she called someone else to do it. Neither of them have worked on me before. The second lady did better, but still did a little digging to get the port spot on. It was a visit that made me not want to push for another 2 week visit. FUNK THAT!!

I didn't go back for a full month and when I did, I told the first NP about the visit and she said that the NP that was there that talked that way to me was no longer there so I wouldn't have to deal with that again and that I should have never been treated or talked to the way I was. It REALLY is about patient advocacy when it comes to being a NP. To do what is best for the patient, not for the pocket. Since I am a self pay, meaning I pay monthly on the amount I financed, they don't charge me for visits. I suppose they are "losing" money by me coming in more than a "regular" insurance person. Still, I think my overall feeling of the office personnel and my experiences there have been positive.

They think I have 6cc in my 10cc band. I am doubtful. I think it is more around the 5 1/2cc mark, but it would set me back to take it all out and put it back in so I am told. Guessing isn't working in my mind!

I am so ready to be in the green zone. I am ready for what others call "the melting point" where the weight starts to fall off. I am working out, eating what doesn't seem to be enough and still maintaining at a 30lbs to date loss. The scale is my foe. I am going to have to move it so I am not tempted to get on it twice a day every day. It plays with my mind and I become my own worst enemy.

I am hopeful and prayerful. That's the most I can do and be.

Thank you for reading.

Amber

[Tomander 614]

Welcome Amber !

I've met some great people on this site over the past 6 years.

You sound like your on the right track... take it one day at a time.

Ask lots of questions.

I still get weighed in every month with my family doctor (I don't own scales). I also host 2 monthly coffee groups for people that are banded or looking into procedure. Both these things keep me motivated.

Please feel free to email me if you have any questions.

Tom, Toronto

Banded July 6 06

Wt. Loss: 156 lbs

tomander@bell.net

[2muchfun 8,927]

Amber, I took 4 months to finally feel some restriction and 6 months to the green zone. I remember being in a hurry too. I didn't realize that sneaking up on this green zone is a good idea. I thought I was eating right and eating the band way. Now, 10 months out, I can look back and know how naive I was.

Even when I got to the green zone I wasn't eating the band way. I was eating the right foods but I still ate too fast, too large bites and didn't chew enough. I'm not sure I'm there even now. I do know that 60+ years of gobbling, swallowing and doing it all in an Indy 500 fashion is a very difficult habit to break.

So, I see why my doctor went so slow and it took 6 fills to get to the green zone. I wasn't ready and he knew it. I thought I did, but I didn't. It's still working but I've decided to take this journey a little slower than I had intended.

tmf

[Amber_banded052312 8]

Thanks for the welcome. I too thought faster was better. I have taken the "let me come in once a month" route from this point forward. After the set back of having to take out .5cc and then the "bad" visit with the mean nurses, it made me take a step back. I really felt like a failure. I keep getting pats on the back saying how great I am doing and looking, but I still don't see it. Again, my own worst enemy.

But this is something I would do again and would suggest to other people.

Most of all, I have learned that I am so much stronger than I thought I ever could/would/should be.

Thanks again!

[scorrea 95]

I have had three two fills in my 14cc band. I am at about 5cc now. I am also a work in progress. I thought I needed another fill when it just took a bit for me to realize that the "magic" was me! I had to use the band to reallize that I was full and walk away from the food! and to have that feeling now, its great! I cannot believe how it is working, I just need to listen to my band! It tells me when I have had enough. I do still eat too fast sometimes and my bites are a bit big, but as previously said, we have had so many years learning these bad habits, they arent going to fall away overnight.

Keep up the work.. it will happen!!! I am a slow loser so far. I think I am still figuring the kinks out, but I am happy most of the time!

[marfar7 1,532]

The first 5 month after getting my band were really rough. I thought I had failed yet another diet. I ate just like I did pre band. I lost maybe 5 lbs. Then my 3rd fill, the magic started. I could only eat a few bites of anything. I've never counted anything or measured. I go by what my body tells me to. I've lost 100 lbs with about 15 left to go (and the last 20 are the HARDEST to lose, btw).

As soon as you get to the "sweet spot", you'll start losing more. I promise. I think people with failed bands give up before finding that spot. My insurance only covered 1 yr of fills, so I have to pay $160 every time I go to the dr. My band slipped about 5 mths ago and I'm still working on rectifying it. Haven't lost (but I did gain a few lbs!) in the last yr or so.

Just letting you know that you still have time. Don't give up. Finding that "sweet spot" is a pain sometimes, but well worth it. Good luck!

Marci

[Amber_banded052312 8]

Thanks so much for your inspiring words!

Tonight was supposed to be our lap-band meeting. I got off work 10 min early and was in traffic for 40 min driving across town. Just to find out the meeting had been cancelled. No email. No text or phone call. I was talking on my cell phone about it to my banded friend and there was a lady there that was a newbie to the meetings so I didn't know her. In listening to her, I felt like she really needed to talk. So in the parking garage I opened myself to conversation. So not my norm, but I felt like she needed someone to talk to. So, I talked a little about where I am on my journey, but then opened it up for her to tell me her story. She really needed some kind words and a listening ear. She had a bad experience and was struggling. Feeling like this was all her fault and that she was in a bad place because she wasn't motivated and she really needed someone to support her along the way. So I gave her my email information and she gave me hers. A hour later we both leave and have to pay $4 in parking for a meeting that seemingly never happened. BUT, I made that drive for a reason. I was there for her and she for me. I felt the need to help someone and stop the woe is me, victim mentality, and BAM .. it was amazeballs.

I feel blessed to be given this "accidental" or happen stance situations where my life's mission of being able to help others is answered.

God is good.

I am thankful.