Friends No More

[Sarah75 67]

Today I had lunch with a friend of mine...I met with her to give her a job..before we could even get to that part lunch fell apart...she suggested Taco Bell I said ok...knowing I would just have the small bowl of refried Beans ( surgery was Sept 6th)....she asked how my progress was going and I said really well..and she said " it can't be that hard u barely eat anything and can sit around and lose weight"...she is a bigger gal who's mom had gastric bypass 8 years ago so I though her of all people would be supportive...I have a pretty sharp Italian temper and before i thought I said back to her..."I bust my ass 4 miles a day on my treadmill..yes ur right it does take much to fill me up but I still hafta watch what I eat and make sure it's the right foods...you were prob full 2 freaking tacos ago but choose to ignore it"...I got up and left...ok soo I do feel a little guilty abt snapping off on her like that...but I'm guessing this was a friendship that was not gonna last once i started losin weight and she did nothing for herself..such a shame we had tons of fun together

[TKW 501]

Wow... that's too bad.

[NWgirl 574]

There are a lot of misconceptions about WLS, so even though her mom had bypass does not mean she's informed. I think you were in the wrong here because you said something hurtful whereas her statement sounds like it was made out of ignorance about the actual band.

[yoli76 5]

hey guess what i sit around ! i do my house work go 4 walks i just moved to the 3rd floor, i been a year n a half with lapband ! 255 starting ! i am 160! i do not go for work outs !

[Shayna72 2]

I am sorry to hear that you lost someone you had a lot of fun with.

If anyone found weight loss so easy, there wouldn't be so many "tools" aka surgeries, pills, etc.) for people to look into. She can just keep on eating her 4-6 tacos and you enjoy the pounds coming off girly. I am down almost 130.... lots to go but I am not looking behind me anymore

Good luck to you

[Sarah75 67]

There are a lot of misconceptions about WLS' date=' so even though her mom had bypass does not mean she's informed. I think you were in the wrong here because you said something hurtful whereas her statement sounds like it was made out of ignorance about the actual band.[/quote']

No she is well informed..she even went to the seminar with me...and if u could o seen her body language tone and expression it clearly was a jab

[2muchfun 8,927]

My daughter, the recent college grad(molecular cellular developmental biology degree) told me two weeks ago that people who have WLS are just lazy people. Yes, she knows I had WLS. But she said it out of pure ignorance. I guess they don't teach students that humans are not plants or rats and may behave or develop in different manners.

I know that immediate fire that consumes the back of your skull and quickly migrates to your mouth. I'm not Italian and I'm trying to keep a good relationship with my know-it-all-daughter so I just pretended to ignore her comment. Had it been a friend or a stranger I would have blasted them with some select basic rules of biology and common sense.

tmf

[Mayasgram 351]

Sounds like you did'nt really value the friendship anyway. Wondering if you would have made the 2 Tacos ago comment before in regards to you both having lunch. You mean you had surgery 13 days ago and you are doing 4 miles wow I am impressed even now I still would have a hard time with the Beans.< /p>

Do Italains have a corner on hot tempers just asking.

[Sarah75 67]

Sounds like you did'nt really value the friendship anyway. Wondering if you would have made the 2 Tacos ago comment before in regards to you both having lunch. You mean you had surgery 13 days ago and you are doing 4 miles wow I am impressed even now I still would have a hard time with the Beans.

Do Italains have a corner on hot tempers just asking.

Im not a mean person untill poked or pushed..ur right I would of never made the taco comment b4 I woulda been right there with her cramming 4 of them down myself..but her comment was way out of line and I was not gonna take it and I did value our freindship...many times I have been there for her and vise versa...yes I'm doing 4 miles of speed walking a day cut into 2 different sessions...I've dropped 26lbs in 13 days!!..could not be happier with myself..and most of the women in my family have hot tempers..I'm the mild one ha

[ElleG 394]

Friends come in leaves, branches and roots. Leaves blow away there for a season. Branches can b there for years it takes a lot to break them, but they do brake. Roots are there and will be there a lifetime. Only you know what kind of friend this is to you. It the season was up keep stepping and let it go, but if you know in your heart she is more than that apologize to salvage the friendship. TRUE friends are hard to come by. Good luck

[Nayelli 36]

Sweetie, I fully undesrtand where you are coming from I was five days post-op ( my wls date was august 21 2012) when I heard that my sister in-law told my dad .."well i'm happy for her, but I think that it would have been better if she just tried doing something for herself before she got to that point and do it the natural way" what a load of bs. She of all people cause I used to trust her at least with my weight issues knows how hard I tried for so many years. Then she did'nt even say it to my face. Problem is that my tongue can be pretty sharp as well so and it ends up gettin getin lots of trouble. Some people are informed but are just to dumb by choice to want to underdtand and instead of feeling angry at them and lashing out I think we should pitty them

[raindrop1999 15]

my sister in law also bypass and also turned to a different person not caring aboutothers and i had it out with her notto longago we havetodeal with seeing cuz shes family but i will tell her off shes mean now weight losschanged her alot for the worse

[Nayelli 36]

well thats definately a bummer =( weight loss should help you be a better version of you not the other way around. Hope things get better with you and you sister in-law an dmine as well. It great to hear from you raindrop1999 Sorry I forgot what you sai dypur name was we met in the chat room a couple of times how are you doing?

[missybear 86]

Sorry to hear you've lost a friend, hope things calm down and you can be friends again one day (perhaps not dinner buddies any time soon).

I've also had some unfortunate times out with friends poking fun at what i'm eating and saying they all want a lap band just to lose weight. Funny none of them want to come for a run or spin class though!

Most disappointing was some comments from my fellow lap banders friends last week, who said i must be doing something wrong and not really caring given i had a tuna salad wrap, (which i agree was at the upper end of the size scale for a lapbander) for lunch vs their fried fish and fries covered in creamy sauce. Even at half the portion size, the calories were dripping from very mouthful they were eating which was repulsive, and i copped a lecture about eating too much. Funny i wasnt washing mine down with alcohol and needed something to fuel my body before going for a surf. I've just started to develop a tough skin and come to learn those who i expected more support have sadly let me down and some of the best support has come from those i never expected.

[ebonymc 52]

I'm sure the two of you will reconcile. A lot of this kind of talk comes out of jealousy. I had only lost around 45 of the 75 lbs that I needed to lose when one of my co-workers said to me " you don't need to lose anymore on the backside". This was a friend of mine and the words were hurtful. I smiled and shrugged it off. We continue to work together just as before, but I will never forget how she made me feel. Although she was right...LOL. But our friendship wasn't on that type of a relationship. She was taking jabs at me