Harder And Harder

[wildrose1966 396]

I feel like I am lying so much that my nose is growing. I have chosen not to announce to the world that I am having surgey (7 people know) and I work in a small office where everyone knows your business. As well, I work in sales so there is tonnes of entertaining, lunches and dinners. So far today I lied to the Hr manager about my 'vacation' next week and how I will be taking the week to golf and close up the summer house etc. I have a lunch scheduled the 1st day back to work which I asked a coworker to attend and a gala the day after that, where I just put in my meal request for a cream veggie Soup, no lumps. (although I am sure if they put the filet on my plate, I would have a grand old time licking it.) I have declined a 'team' dinner on my first day back to work. It is also strange that I would be taking 'vacation' when we are sooooo busy.

My gig could be up soon if I don't remember my stories. I will eventually tell people I work with, but need to figure everything out first, for myself without people watching everything I eat or do or wanting to talk about it. I guess I could have just told people I am having surgery and that it is personal..........but I didn't.

Monday morning at 7:30am..........life will change just a little bit.

[wildrose1966 396]

That is on top of the stories I made up while making my Optifast in the lunch room with a blender for the last 2 weeks..........I think the first day everyone was excited that maybe someone was making milkshakes and rushed to the kitchen, now nobody says anything.

[FLORIDAYS 3,040]

If you are worried about it... come clean before you leave and tell the boss you are having a medical procedure and that you were too emarrased to say anthing at first but you value your job and love working there so wanted to be honest with him/her.

You dont want to be recovering from surgery while worrying about your job

[wildrose1966 396]

Boss knows as does my assistant...........it is all the other busy bodies. Not worried about my job.

[FLORIDAYS 3,040]

Boss knows as does my assistant...........it is all the other busy bodies. Not worried about my job.

gotcha... well then like we talked about before...ignore them

[colleenjoy 104]

it's hard, but I think you are doing what you need to do. Not everyone needs to know your business. Keep is simple though. Only a few people knew I was having surgery, the rest just thought I was taking a week off. When people asked what I did I told them I did stuff around the house. It's true, i was walking around the house a lot that week

[Sojourner 2,446]

Either way...no matter who knows and who does not, it's the stress this situation creates for you which will have a negative impact on you.

I've always felt that it was important to stay in your comfort zone when deciding on how much and to who you discuss your surgery with.

You should never feel that you need to disclose more information than you feel comfortable with.

One lie usually leads to another, before long you likely will not be able to keep your stories straight. My solution would to disclose your surgery only to those who you feel comfortable with telling. Others, you should not feel obligated to answer questions which you do not choose to discuss.

Primary consideration is keeping your stress manageable and in your comfort zone.

[Ronnie Rae Scott 8]

I think you are doing the right thing! everyone is always asking me how much iv lost, what i eat, how do i feel...I cant stand it! I wish no one knew...I didn't tell anyone, my sister put it on Facebook, I could have killed her

[MissE44 27]

I was in the same boat. I told no one except my mom and boyfriend. I also eat out at work alot.

I didn't take much work off just the Firday on a long weekend so that is pretty normal and when I came back we went out to lunch that day I just said my stomach has been feeling funny and I lost my hunger and just wanted to stick to Soup. My co-worker (who shares the love of food like I do) said that's all? So to make her happy I got a very soft appitizer smoked salmon and goat cheese i took three very small bites chewed really well and took the rest home for my boyfriend.

Now that i am on soft foods it is easier at resturants no one has noticed or said anything so you can do it.

In the past with failing so many diets I just want to do this on my own with no judgement.

[Mayasgram 351]

Well your professional life was like mine and I was often to busy to eat and then watch out when I did.

It is your choice to tell or not to tell personally I couldn't keep up with all the stories . Our receptionist had the surgery when I was working and it was well known like she weighed a lot so that was no secret. I know when she went through the process there was lots of talk but really as the weight came off everyone was supportive. Her decision to take control of her body was the incentive I needed to start thinking about my body and what I wanted as she ate het little bits and walked 30 mins on her lunch hour I was like wow if she can do it maybe their is hope for me..

It was hard to go to all the business things and not eat I just did it. I nibbled and pushed food around and put down my fork to listen to my associates surprising what you learn when you listen. Good Luck your life is going t o change in ways you only dreamed of. And maybe you will be te catalyst for some one else to take care of their body.

[MissE44 27]

I think you are doing the right thing! everyone is always asking me how much iv lost, what i eat, how do i feel...I cant stand it! I wish no one knew...I didn't tell anyone, my sister put it on Facebook, I could have killed her

That's really mean in my books.

[wildrose1966 396]

I think you are doing the right thing! everyone is always asking me how much iv lost, what i eat, how do i feel...I cant stand it! I wish no one knew...I didn't tell anyone, my sister put it on Facebook, I could have killed her

We always laugh because I quote alot about things I find out on Facebook and Twitter........I am a wealth of information!!!

[Mayasgram 351]

Just read someones post about eating a pretzel to make a co worker happy. OMG thats one of the ways I got so fat eating when I wasn't hungry to please some one else. You know the clean plate club girl who never wanted to hurt anyone.

STOP STOP STOP. do not fall in to that . If someones that concerned with your eating and what and when and how much they are not concerned about you they want company on the fat road they are on or they want you to stay fat so they do not have to compete with you. Never eat to please anyone else ever. Usually I end with just sayin.. but I hope your are just listening...

[mimi81082 27]

I, like you, didn't want many people to know; especially at work. I told 3 people at work...my boss, my, close co-worker, and another co-worker who had the surgery. I asked them not to say anything, but when I came back to work someone had blabbed and EVERYONE knew and was asking me questions. I was annoyed, but what's done is done. I mainly didn't want anyone criticizing what I eat and how much weight I lose or don't lose. Other workers have made it public knowledge that they had the surgery and people talk behind their back about how "big they still are." I've just chosen not to focus on what anyone else thinks of me and only on my goal of losing weight. The good thing is everyone seems supportive so far.

[RhondaMarie 67]

I am in a similar spot, but handled it the opposite way.

I work in a group of 24 women... 7 who are in my immediate area and who are vicious gossip mongers a lot of the time.

One of the 7 had some kind of surgery a few yrs ago. EVERYONE believes that she had WLS. No one cared that she had the procedure, but her stories to cover it were ridiculous. She took like 8 weeks off and told people she lost weight b/c she had a tumor removed.

Long story short... people around you pick up and whisper if they think there is something to whisper about.

I made my choice and was about 3 months into the supervised plan before I told anyone beyond my boss. A co-worker made a rude comment about all the fatties getting lap-band (we work at a hospital) so I pulled her aside and told her how harmful comments can be. She isn't small either...

I gradually told everyone about a week later. I decided that I was going to get out in front of it and cut the gossip off before it could get started.

Now they are positive and supportive. Except they are ordering pizza for lunch and I am pre-op dieting it... grrr.

They even planned a dessert day and didn't bat an eye when I asked them to do it while I was off.

Only you know what's right for you. Bottom line, as long as your boss supports you and approved the vacation... they should have nothing to say!!