Tried to Talk Me out of the Band

[Carlene 12]

Count me as one of those people who knew someone that died from complications of bypass surgery. My oldest son's neighbor was young (in her 30s) and healthy. She was a model patient, too. She was 3 months post-op when she died. She left a husband and two young children. Statistics mean a lot more when you can put a face with the numbers.

[rachele 0]

I agree that bandsters and bypassers have different needs, and you shouldn't be subject to what you were at that support group.

No surgery is one size fits all. I had a band and now have a duodenal switch bypass. It's amazing to me that so many people here talk about how bad bypassers are but throughout this whole thread, with a few exceptions, the trash talk has abounded.

And Dody, you are one of the worst offenders. And with the medical backgroud you have people think you actually know what you're talking about, and in reality, you are clueless.

Everyone here says that the unbanded should stay to share their experiences, but I guess that only means if you didn't revise to a bypass. I have consistently been offended and overlooked alot of post, to save drama.

The day of my revision surgery when Sue posted about my recovery immediately the post turned into a "do you know how many people die from that surgery" post. If you don't believe me, look it up. Now that, bandsters, is some REAL support.

Before you all go trashing someone elses choice in surgery, maybe you should remember how it feels when someone trashes yours. We all have the same goal in mind.

And while we are at it, where is the proof about this skin issue everyone brings up. Thats like saying if you over inflate a balloon, it won't be as stretched out if you let the air out slowly. Sorry! Doesn't work that way. It all has to do with heridity, amount of weight lost and the individual.

I hope none of you ever have to eat your own words, because for some of you that would be one bitter meal.

[gottabehappy 0]

I have had my band for almost a year. It is the best thing I ever did for myself. I have only told 2 people of my surgery. I don't like being the center of attention. That works for me. I don't care to hear anyone's opinion on the banding that I thought would work best for me. It is a very personal decision.

I look at it this way, I didn't gain the weight over night and I don't want to lose it overnight either. It is hard work. Harder than I thought, but I am becoming a healthier person because of it. I exercise a ton! I feel good that I am affecting my weight loss because of good habits that I am making. I hope that I will have less issues in the long run with health. I am also hoping that my skin won't sag as much.

I was told from day 1 that the band is only a TOOL. It is up to me to decide how to use it.

I am far from perfect in using the band. But, as I get fills, the corrections that I get from eating too fast or too much reinforce the healthy lifestyle that I should have had all along.

I am proud of me and what I have accomplished. I think this surgery is a heck of a lot more work than the bypass. It really makes me happy to know that everything is still intact just incase. Who knows what they will find in a few years with the bypass. Maybe the complications and risks just aren't worth it.

Even if I never lost another pound and only made it this far, I wouldn't change a thing, nor would I want to get the bypass.

[danaclark2 0]

I hope that I never come across to anyone here or elsewhere as judgmental towards a person for what surgery he/she has chosen. I am certainly in NO position to judge anyone about weight, etc.

I have gone back and forth in my mind on which surgery is best for me--I really don't know which one is--I've never had WLS. By faith, I choose the band. Who knows what will happen in the future?

What upset me the most at my support group meeting is that the leader pretty much said banding was for the birds--and even said that "most people will eventually convert to RNY." That wasn't exactly the most encouraging pep talk right before my Lap Band surgery.

Ahh--who knows...I know this--I feel peaceful in my spirit about getting the band--at this point in my life. God may direct me in a different direction in the future.

Let us all support each other in this battle against obesity--no matter what weapon we choose.

[rachele 0]

Ahh--who knows...I know this--I feel peaceful in my spirit about getting the band--at this point in my life. God may direct me in a different direction in the future.

Let us all support each other in this battle against obesity--no matter what weapon we choose.

Then you have choosen the correct surgery for you. We all got the negativity before banding, back when I had it done, it was really, really bad. But like someone here said "Ride your own ride". You'll be great.:biggrin1:

[3loves 0]

Let us all support each other in this battle against obesity--no matter what weapon we choose.

Well said Dana. :clap2: I was actually surprised to find the bypass people so supportive at the groups I attended. I was really expecting more of what you experienced. This does go to show that all overweight people do have something in common regardless of what or if they decide to do something about it.

rachele ~ I am a newbie & preband, but I am sorry you have felt offended. I feel you do have a place here however, I do think you should expect to hear some things you don't like. Personally, I didn't see anything wrong with what Doty posted on this tread b/c she was stating her opinion and her friend's experience. I would never do bypass myself, but more power to you if that's what you decide.

And Dody, you are one of the worst offenders. And with the medical background you have people think you actually know what you're talking about, and in reality, you are clueless.

Again, I am new, but I do believe there is something in the rules saying "to attack an idea and not a person or individual". From what I read, this is what your doing to Doty. I don't always agree with Doty or others for that matter, but I go on to something else.

When I attend 2 groups this week, I didn't learn about band issues, but I did go away with a little something so it wasn't a total lose.

1. Learned about possible hair lose (missed it here somehow).

2. I will write down how I feel b4 my surgery so I never forget that feeling and hopefully, that will bring me inspiration some day when I need a boost.

I learned more at LBT than I could ever learn at a 2 hr group meeting.....even if they were only bandsters. This is what works for me. Like you said, WLS is not one size fits all and I think most people would agree with that statement. Feelings and convictions are the same way. You have to accept them for what they are and move forward.

I wish you luck and I hope you find your place here or somewhere that you can feel like part of the family.

[ralheit 1]

It's too bad that someone would try to talk you out of your decision. I think everyone on this site had the dilema of making a decision between the two procedures. If you've done your research, you know that for safety and less risk, the band is the way to go. I also have many friends who have had bypass and believe me, the odor problems everyone has discussed are real. With so many people on this site who have talked about how happy they are with their bands, and with the support of my doctors for this procedure over the bypass. I feel I have made the right decision for me. We al know it is slower, but also healthier and although we would all probably wish we could snap our fingers and be thinner, realistically, this is the way to go. Slow and steady and healthy. Wishing you the best. Hang in there.

[SherryW 4]

Very well put Jack and ohhh so true. Doesn't matter what forum, but people do forget we're all here for the same "common" reason We have a spare tire that needs a flat

[rachele 0]

Again, I am new, but I do believe there is something in the rules saying "to attack an idea and not a person or individual". From what I read, this is what your doing to Doty. I don't always agree with Doty or others for that matter, but I go on to something else.

Even though I feel like doing this, I don't think I have. I have responded to post that Dody has made several times saying things such as "when bypass fails, and it will" or stating that people over 60 who have bypass have a life expectency of 2 years, or that you have to be cut "wide open" to have bypass" to which she ignores. If you looked at some of the things she has said, it's enough to make the Pope lose some religion, and yes, I am fed up with it. I guess that really is my problem, maybe you are right. I will go look for a remedy for that. :speechles And I had my band for over 3 years. I was already revised to bypass in November. I always thought I would never consider it either till I was faced with the decision.

The rest is just a rant, not directed to anyone in particuliar. I want you all to see beyond what you are seeing. I know some people get it, but just be happy with what you have and live and let live.

No matter how many storys there are about someones brothers sisters wifes cousins bypass, there are just as many storys about the band. There are hundreds of thousands of people who are successful with bypass (which is more than just RNY), same as there are successful people with the band. One of my favorite cyber friends is Robin (aka Coffeewench), she has had her band well over 6 years I think, and did the lap band commericials you see on TV. She is the definition of lapband success.

I have no hard feelings against my band, it served me well. It did not cause the medical condition that caused it to come out. But just because my band had to come out doesn't mean it will happen to everyone. And just because I had a DS bypass doesn't mean I am retarded and living life on the edge, putting filters in my panties (never heard of this) and offending everyone with my farts and poops. As fat people, we have lived with enough discrimination our entire lives. It's a shame we still discriminate against each other depending on what surgery we've had.

Just because someone doesn't have a band doesn't mean they are unintelligent, stinky and shriveled. I eat like a normal person (because I have the DS), which means sugar if I want it, because DS'ers don't dump, I don't have a pouch, so I don't get blockages and ulcers. I eat more now than I did with the band. And I love being able to eat a sandwhich and eggs again. I am happy. And really, thats all that matters. That each of us is happy and hopefully satisfied with our choices.

[S@ssen@ch 745]

That each of us is happy and hopefully satisfied with our choices.

Isn't that the goal of support forums like LBT?

I don't remember anyone accusing bypassers of the things you mentioned. I know those symptoms have been discussed, but those are not necessarily a foregone conclusion for all bypassers. I think that we, as bandsters, convince ourselves that the other surgeries definately have these "severe and adverse" side effects so that we can be confidant in our decisions about lap band. And vice versa. I'm sure the bypass patients do the same about lap band. That doesn't mean I'm offended that they do it. It's just "the grass is green on MY side" this time. I'm happy with my decision. Yes, there are lifestyle changes. Yes there may be side effects such as gas or burping. These were side effects I was willing to live with. I would hope the bypassers would be able to say the same about their decision. I don't judge them for it. They made their decision for their own reasons just as I made my decision for my own reasons.

Jack made some very valid points regarding the comparisons to different makes of cars, motorcycles, etc. When you think of it that way, it makes perfect sense. We all have the same fight, obesity. We just took a different path to get to the battle and win the war.

[rachele 0]

Dawn, I concur. Noone ever accused bypassers of being retarded and unintelligent. Stinky, yes, but we are all stinky at one point or another.

I apologize to the O.P. about how this got off track. I think it is a real shame that someone tried to discourage you. I know how it feels and I've been through it with the band and the bypass. I shouldn't have hijacked your post because one poster makes me nuts. (Not you, Dawn. I think you are a very sensible lady.) I need to learn what the ignore feature is for.

Good luck in your journey and I hope the scale fairy visits you often!

[K@t 38]

Hey Rachele,

I can understand why your feeling frustrated, but there is an ignore option in the control panel. You can add people to it for whom you do not want to see their posts. Then you will never have to read the things that can be potentially upsetting.

[JenWillwin 0]

I will be having my lap band procedure done at the end of April and yes, I know what you guys are saying. The support group I went to isolated me as the only lap band person there out of about 30. A lady who had the gastric bypass done years ago turned to me and said " you dont want to get that done because my friend had it done and she only lost 70 pounds in 6 months." 70 pounds in 6 months!!! To me, that is WONDERFUL, I told her! How many times have I gone on a diet and lost weight, only to gain it all back and more and sink even more into depression. How is losing that much weight not a good thing???? Even the Dr doing my lap band said he would recommend me getting the gastric bypass instead b/c of the amount of weight I have to lose(150 pounds). He said the success rate is only 30-50% in lap band patients!!! My thoughts are this: How can a surgery that limits me to 3-5oz meals per day NOT be successfull? Even when I had my psych eval the psychiatrist told me gastric bypass may be better because I was a" sweets" eater. Taken if you drink nothing but milkshakes you will not lose weight! I think if I eat a lot of Protein with the occasional choclate chip cookie I should be just fine. At least a lot better then I am now. I have read to many success stories about the lap band and I will be another success story to prove them wrong. I just dont get it!

[danaclark2 0]

JenWillwin--

Your post is exactly how I feel---I've been thinking the same thing. How could this not work if we eat significantly less. I'm really not into sweet drinks--I'm more of a cookie person, but I'm willing to do away with them (for the most part) to reach my goal.

70 lbs. in six months--I could only dream...

Here's my truth as I see it now: I HONESTLY DO NOT CARE IF I ONLY LOSE 30-40 LBS IN ONE YEAR--AS LONG AS I'M LOSING AND AS LONG AS I CONTINUE TO LOSE THE NEXT YEAR AND THE NEXT. OF COURSE, I WOULD LOVE FOR IT TO BE QUICKER--BUT BEING 40 LBS LIGHTER IS BETTER THAN BEING 40LBS HEAVIER THAN I AM NOW--OR STAYING THE SAME. I'M ABOUT 27O LBS NOW--IF I AM 230LBS ON APRIL 18, 2007, I'LL BE SINGING FOR JOY--AND THEN IF I'M 190LBS BY APRIL 18, 2008, I'LL BE JUMPING FOR JOY. JUST LET ME MAKE PROGRESS, PLEASE. I'M REALLY HOPING THE BAND WILL GIVE ME JUST THAT--THE EXTRA PUSH TO ACHIEVE MY WEIGHT LOSS/HEALTH GOALS.

[Kimbo 0]

JenWillwin & Dana,

Way to go girls, you attitude to suceed is you biggest tool besides your band. Staying focused, keep on track & yes, treat yourself every once in a while & you both will do great.

I go to 2 support groups, 1 for lapband & the other is all RNY but me. The lapband group is mainly social, we meet at aTGIFridays once a month & have a great time visiting. The RNY group is very structured, but they are a great group of folks who are there to give & receive support. I have learned alot from both groups & look forward to the meetings.

Good luck to you both on you journey. It is the best choose you have ever made,

Kim