Do You Ever Feel Judged Because You Are On The "smaller" Side?

[Flowering man 28]

I was a BMI of 38 before my lapband (yesterday

[Flowering man 28]

I was a BMI of 38.

For many years I was constantly told by family and work colleagues ( rarely friends ) that I was overweight or putting on weight. Why do people think its ok to talk about other people's weight??

I've been slowly developing weight related health issues over the years. The death of my father and the discovery that men in our family have heart related early deaths spurred me to do something. I was very aware that I was obese for many years and that I needed to do something drastic to really get to a healthy BMI - 25

I'm not going to tell many people that I have had a lapband fitted - including my family. Even though they constantly go on about my weight they won't approve of a lap band. There is a big stigma in the UK, i think, about lapbands.

It's not that I don't exercise - I ran a marathon 20 months ago - I just ate far too much and found it impossible to control the quantity I food I ate.

So yes, I've also had people say I'm too thin for a lapband. Actually it was 2 staff in the hospital. It did really pee me off because they have no idea of the reasons why I had a lapband fitted and I really don't need hospital staff telling me that!!

People have a perception that you have to be so overweight that you can't get out of bed before you have a lapband fitted. The fact is that these people would need to loose a lot of weight before they have a lapband fitted. They should probably have done some about there weight much sooner.

Personally I think it's better to get a control of your diet before you get so seriously overweight. I tried hard to do this by running 10k's, numerous half marathons and a marathon - but it wasn't enough.So why not get control of your weight when you're a BMI of 38?? I don't give a flying FCUK what people say about how I've lost weight - it was my decision, its my body. But i'm not going to give anyone the opportunity to comment about my lapband because I'm not going to tell anyone. The people who criticise the use of a lapband will be the first to criticise your weight - so bollocks to them I say.

[beanie80 146]

I'm happy to have found this thread as it was just what I was looking for. I've been told by several people that I'm not overweight enough for the lap band. My BMI is right below 35, I have no co-morbidities and exercise frequently. I have struggled with my weight my whole life and I'm scared if I don't do this now that I will just get bigger and end up with co-morbidities. How fast have you all lost weight?

[B-52 7,113]

Before being banded, remember telling my Cardiologist my plans....he turned, looked at me and said "YOU?" "WLS?"

Why not a good dieting, exercising, etc, etc,......all you need is 100 lbs.....eating right should do that for you.....

I did not want to spend the next 20 minutes telling him my life story how I tried and FAILED at every diet in the world, no self control, addicted to food, blah blah blah.....

Now, today....he cannot stop complimenting me....the guy who had at least one heart attack, Cardiac Surgery, miserable blood work results, and one foot in the grave........he NOW refers to me as HIS best patient, HIS success story.....the guy who runs stress tests like it's just another day at the gym.........wait a minute...he's the one who did not think it was a good idea.....He's the one who said all I needed to do was (another) diet......I guess He's the one who suffers from amnesia....

[Jim1967 3,569]

I will admit there was a time in the beginning I would be sitting in the Doctors office waiting room watching people come and go and think 'really? You need WLS?' It was easy as well as ignorant for me to judge based on appearances and the fact I was 488lbs I guess I had a sense of entitlement for my reasons of WLS. I have certainly learned and I am not so quick to judge anymore and I have much respect for those doing whatever it takes to get control of their life for the sake of their health and longevity. WLS has helped me shrink but it has also helped me grow to be more understanding.

[beanie80 146]

Jim when I went to the initial informational meeting I was the smallest person in the room, but also the only one there for lap band. I could feel everyone looking at me like I was crazy. Both the nurse co-ordinator and the surgical scheduler thought I was there for general surgery, not wls. While it did make me feel a bit better about myself, I am 80lbs overweight! Messed up how our society could think that 80 extra lbs (and counting) on a body is not terribly unhealthy and worthy of wls. I know for sure that if I don't get this surgery I will continue to gain weight every single day until it kills me. I love what you say at the end of your comment "WLS has helped me shrink but it has also helped me grow to be more understanding."

Looking at your progress you are doing a great job Jim! keep up the good work

[norcaligirl 4]

Hello all. I am struggling with making the decision for lap band. My weight has flucuated between 300 and 140. I am at least 205 to 210 right now and sick of being a yo yo. It puts my BMI only at 33.5-34. I am actually healthy with no weight causing conditions except for a bad knee and chaffing. I eat really healthy just too much and my sugar craving I only give into about once a week. I don't do alcohol or caffeine. I actually manage to get to the gym maybe 8-10 times a month and walk at home some days for maybe 30 minutes each time. This is where I struggle. During a horrible divorce and ensuing custody battle that still is going on I got down to 140 at one point with eating very little. Maybe 3-5 bites of food at a time a few times a day. This seemed to be alarming to people and they were concerned for me. The only times I have been able to keep myself at a "normal" BMI is eating 1200 calories a day and working out at least an hour 5 days a week. Working full time, having a special needs son and still having some time with my husband I just can't spend that much time at the gym or exercising. So in all that what I see is that it's no socially acceptable more me to eat very little UNLESS i have surgery that limits what I can eat. I can't find my balance and honestly I like being thin and being able to wear cute clothes, not have my thighs rub together. I feel more attractive and more socially acceptable when I am thinner. Any thoughts?

[Flowering man 28]

Hi

Sounds to me like you're in the difficult 'decision' zone. A BMI of 34 is light for a band. I was 38 and got loads of flack for being too light.

Ultimately the band is a pain up the ass. If you think you can loose the weight without it - don't band. For me - I just over ate. I exercised a lot but just over ate. The band stops me from overeating but its not an easy option - its takes years to get used to living with a band, its expensive and it could go wrong. So ideally if you think you can loose the weight without a band then just loose the weight - but thats also a lot easier to type than actually do. I would never be down to a BMI of 25 without the band.

Also by losing weight a lot of the medical issues I had (leaky bottom, asthma, acid stomach, snoring, tendinitis in my feet etc) that I didn't link to be overweight, have gone. My health is dramatically improved. But life would have been easier if I could have lost the weight the normal way and without the band.

So ultimately its your decision and your cash and you have to live with the consequences. Just make sure you're doing it for the right reasons and maybe get some counselling or therapy first? especially as you have other issues as well such as recovering from divorce etc.

good luck with whatever you decide

[punkinvine 227]

Happy for you to make your own decision. I am in the same range as you and only 5 feet tall or a smidge over. My knees were replace in 05 because I had worn them out. I only wish I could have been at a desirable weight earlier and kinder to my knees. The day of my surgery a nurse came into my room and informed me "you are not big enough" for this kind of surgery. That was her opinion... and she was rounder than me. So she may be ok with her . I was struggling to do the kind of activities I wanted to do. I have been blessed to get my BMI under control. I have learned to listen to God and those who really love me. The others have been set on the back burner to talk to themselves!