My Supports Are Not Very...supportive...

[taketimetofind 3]

I am so excited to get my surgery and I am now diving into the pre op process. The problem I am having is my therapy group is full of people who do not think I should do the surgery. The group is for mental Health and some members are worried that I am going to become bulimic once I have the surgery. Another told me that she would do anything to talk me out of this.

I go to this group 4 days a week. It's an IOP. I have my parents at home who are VERY SUPPORTIVE. I don't enjoy going to this group anymore because of this. I am having the surgery I know that. I know that is the most important thing. I just wish the people that I see the most would be more supportive.

Has anyone dealt with this? And also, what did you do?

Also, how can I ignore it? It's all I think about now.

Thanks guys!

Kate

[raindrop1999 15]

i would not go at all find another theres lots ofushere for support

[lassie 247]

Not sure what is going on, so I do not think the people on here are expert enough to answer that question. Do not know the reason they would say that, is there a person who is there to answer questions from the group. If not I would talk to your doctor and go over this issue. God Bless

Lassie

[pink dahlia 2,513]

If you dont mind me asking , why do they think you would become bulimic after being banded ? Sorry , need more info ! if you are comfortable with sharing more info about your reasons maybe we can help you more . good luck !

[NWgirl 574]

I would just tell them that you've made your decision and if they're not supportive, then don't talk about it. I'm guessing you've gone to this group for awhile and so I would not sacrifice those group ties.

[PandorasBox92264 61]

I believe you might be talking about an Intensive outpatient program (IOP) is that correct?

Honestly, I wouldn't toss that group aside because there are reasons that you are in there for various support issues. However my suggestion would be to continue to go to that group and leave the band out of it. Bring your lap band issues to this forum because WE are going to know what you are feeling regarding the band, your group will not.

We will not necessarily be able to help you with your group issues because we do not know the background on why your going.

Is your mental health Doctor on board with you being banded? Just want to make sure on that note, because you might get feelings of depression, regret, mourning for food and make sure he knows this. It is a temporary thing, however it can happen.

You have to take a look at the group that you are in, and you are all trying to work through scenarios together and offer support, however I stress to not use that group as a lapband support group because you will most likely be really disappointed and not get any sort of backup or support there because it is an issue far removed from what is going on in their life. Good luck!

[Sojourner 2,446]

What is the focal point of issues in this therapeutic group? What has the group facilitator done in response to your concerns? These would be important information items to know about for sharing additional information with you.

Unless this is a group devoted to mood disorders or focusing on eating disorders, it does seem that bariatric surgery would be way off topic for a therapeutic group discussion. Most importantly, do you believe that you will be at risk to develop bulimia post op?

Again, you did not disclose some important information about this group setting and focus to really give an informed opinion. What I will write is that it is the group facilitator's responsibility to keep the discussion on topic, and to redirect the group as necessary. No individual in the group should ever feel "singled out" or in the "hot seat" when the discussion topic is focused on them. The group looses it's therapeutic benefit if that happens.

Ultimately, the decision for surgery has to be between you and your physician. If you provide some additional information about the group focus, it would be easier to share valid insights about your situation.

Best wishes...

[taketimetofind 3]

If you don't mind me asking , why do they think you would become bulimic after being banded ? Sorry , need more info ! if you are comfortable with sharing more info about your reasons maybe we can help you more . good luck !

Well, some of the girls in the group have eating disorders. I have bingeing problems. so they thing that i am just going to be swapping one problem for the next. one person in the group knows someone who had the surgery and became bulimic. i mean i thought they were just worried about me in the beginning but now its just annoying.

[taketimetofind 3]

I believe you might be talking about an Intensive outpatient program (IOP) is that correct?

Honestly, I wouldn't toss that group aside because there are reasons that you are in there for various support issues. However my suggestion would be to continue to go to that group and leave the band out of it. Bring your lap band issues to this forum because WE are going to know what you are feeling regarding the band, your group will not.

We will not necessarily be able to help you with your group issues because we do not know the background on why your going.

Is your mental health Doctor on board with you being banded? Just want to make sure on that note, because you might get feelings of depression, regret, mourning for food and make sure he knows this. It is a temporary thing, however it can happen.

You have to take a look at the group that you are in, and you are all trying to work through scenarios together and offer support, however I stress to not use that group as a lapband support group because you will most likely be really disappointed and not get any sort of backup or support there because it is an issue far removed from what is going on in their life. Good luck!

Yes it is an IOP. My doctor is 100% on board and its mainly the group. Thank you so much!

[taketimetofind 3]

What is the focal point of issues in this therapeutic group? What has the group facilitator done in response to your concerns? These would be important information items to know about for sharing additional information with you.

Unless this is a group devoted to mood disorders or focusing on eating disorders, it does seem that bariatric surgery would be way off topic for a therapeutic group discussion. Most importantly, do you believe that you will be at risk to develop bulimia post op?

Again, you did not disclose some important information about this group setting and focus to really give an informed opinion. What I will write is that it is the group facilitator's responsibility to keep the discussion on topic, and to redirect the group as necessary. No individual in the group should ever feel "singled out" or in the "hot seat" when the discussion topic is focused on them. The group looses it's therapeutic benefit if that happens.

Ultimately, the decision for surgery has to be between you and your physician. If you provide some additional information about the group focus, it would be easier to share valid insights about your situation.

Best wishes...

thank you so much. the group is mainly for depression and eating disorders. that is why the bulimia came up. it didn't bother me at first, but the person kept bringing it up.

[honk 780]

Well the only way you would become bulimic is if you vomit. Knock on wood in two years have never vomitted or PB'd .

[Sojourner 2,446]

My concern is that unless you are truly aware of the psychology behind your binge eating, a mood disorder may develop post op. With bulimic patients there is a tendency to use unhealthy excessive methods to purge themselves of the extra calories they ingest. Self loathing, guilt feelings about out of control eating behaviors are all possible to develop post op, unless you are aware of how your thoughts may eventually lead to bulimic behaviors. Having a band, the purging behaviors would definitely place you at higher risk for complications with your band.

Post op, it is not uncommon for some degree of mood disorder to develop. Hormones are gyrating as your body adapts to a different way of eating and diet. Some individuals even go through what seems to be a grieving process as they change their relationship and beliefs about food.

I would definitely recommend you remain in treatment for your eating patterns. It may be more beneficial for you to attend individual sessions for a time with your counselor if you feel that the group dynamics are unhealthy for you.

Best wishes...

[taketimetofind 3]

My concern is that unless you are truly aware of the psychology behind your binge eating, a mood disorder may develop post op. With bulimic patients there is a tendency to use unhealthy excessive methods to purge themselves of the extra calories they ingest. Self loathing, guilt feelings about out of control eating behaviors are all possible to develop post op, unless you are aware of how your thoughts may eventually lead to bulimic behaviors. Having a band, the purging behaviors would definitely place you at higher risk for complications with your band.

Post op, it is not uncommon for some degree of mood disorder to develop. Hormones are gyrating as your body adapts to a different way of eating and diet. Some individuals even go through what seems to be a grieving process as they change their relationship and beliefs about food.

I would definitely recommend you remain in treatment for your eating patterns. It may be more beneficial for you to attend individual sessions for a time with your counselor if you feel that the group dynamics are unhealthy for you.

Best wishes...

thank you so so much. everything you have said has been helpful