Afraid To Lose More Weight

[Kels 3]

I am really freaking out right now. All my life I've been overweight. I've always identified myself as a "big girl" or "curvy" or "full figured/goddess sized", and I sort of owned it. Being bigger than everyone was just who I was and I accepted it. When I first got banded I was a size 18, now I'm in a 12. I never remember being this small as an adult, it's like I went from kids clothes to a size 14 overnight when I was around 13yrs old. I've come to realize that I don't know what it even means to live life as a thin/normal weight person.

All my friends are overweight and I've come to realize that a lot of the lifestyle choices they made (and I made too) is what causes it. They always invite me out to eat and I used to say no because I knew there wouldn't be any healty choices. Then it got to the point to where I was getting a feeling that they thought I was being snobby so now I go but only eat a couple of bites and box the rest up. Which only causes every one at the table to give me dirty looks. Now I'm on the outs with girls I've been friends with since high school. Instead of being happy for my weightloss they seem resentful.

I feel like I'm losing who I am. I want to lose weight, I know I need to, but I never imagined it would cause these kinds of changes in my life. I'm at the point to where I'm afraid to lose more weight because I don't want to lose any more friends and most importantly I don't want to lose my identity.

Am I crazy? Has anyone else experienced this?

[tflemon67 88]

This is just the new you, if they are true friends they will accept you skinny or fat! Health just has to come first, the consequences of long-term obesity are just too great.

[readytogoforit 172]

I think this is not your problem, it's theirs! it is their own guilt that is getting in the way. I would continue to be the same person you have always been with them. try to get together, continue to eat well, take home the left overs. I bet they will eventually ask for help in doing the same thing!!

they might be afraid of losing you too!??

As much as we all want things to change (weight loss), it is really complex. It's a lot more than the numbers going down!!! I have had lots of attention too because the change is extreme, I usually say thanks and try to change the subject. I love the attention but I like my friends too. as time goes by we will not be such a "big deal".

[♕ajtexas♕ 3,771]

This is just the new you' date=' if they are true friends they will accept you skinny or fat! Health just has to come first, the consequences of long-term obesity are just too great.[/quote']

Couldn't agree more. You are more important than them. Bet they are envious of how you look and feel.

[jen_1381 446]

Don't limit yourself and your happiness on their behalf. Your friends should love you no matter what you look like. Maybe you losing weight is making them consider their life choices. The fact of reality is that people change, always. I expect my friends to embrace the change, as I do with all of their life changes.

This journey can be super tough, as you probably know, and that's why it's SO important to surround yourself with positve, supportive people.

[DELETE THIS ACCOUNT! 12,703]

Your body size, big or small, is not your identity Who you are inside is who you are. We identify with being a "big girl" or "curvy chic" because it's all we have known. But, just because your body changes doesn't mean it changes who you are. Think of it like this: You get a gorgeous, flawless diamond as a gift. This diamond comes in wrapped in gold paper and in a red velvet box. But, if the diamond came wrapped up in old newspaper and in a shoe box, would it not still be the same gorgeous, flawless diamond? YOU are that diamond, your wrapping on the outside has absolutely nothing to do with who you are inside.

As for your friends, I would be willing to bet there are some jealousy issues at work here, whether they want to admit it or not. I have dealt with similar. It's like you're the kid escaping fat camp and all the other kids are jealous because you successfully got out and they're still stuck in fat camp hell. Do not let your friends make you feel bad for bettering yourself and making yourself healthier. Your true friends will be there and support your changes, not try to sabotage your efforts or drag you back into the fat camp.

Embrace yourself and new body!

[cbarreto 38]

Yes...dont let anyone tell u different. I recently posted my profile pic to Facebook. Some friends said i look great and one said she was worried and i look sick! people will always think u are losing too much..its just cause they never seen us thin..one girl jokes that i looked like a crackhead...she also struggles with weight..she laughed as if she was "kidding" but i was taken back...n i sti have 50lbs to lose!

[difa 114]

Yes...dont let anyone tell u different. I recently posted my profile pic to Facebook. Some friends said i look great and one said she was worried and i look sick! people will always think u are losing too much..its just cause they never seen us thin..one girl jokes that i looked like a crackhead...she also struggles with weight..she laughed as if she was "kidding" but i was taken back...n i sti have 50lbs to lose!

As I lose weight I will unfriend anyone who makes negative comments.

[jeani81 93]

A true friend would be there to support you and not out you because they have a problem with your weightless. You need to do what is best for you and your true friends will be there by your side. If you think that they are just not educated on your new life and how the band works then educate them so there isn't anymore miscommunication.

[tflemon67 88]

Yes...dont let anyone tell u different. I recently posted my profile pic to Facebook. Some friends said i look great and one said she was worried and i look sick! people will always think u are losing too much..its just cause they never seen us thin..one girl jokes that i looked like a crackhead...she also struggles with weight..she laughed as if she was "kidding" but i was taken back...n i sti have 50lbs to lose!

I can't wait to hear folks say I'm losing too much weight! I haven't seen the 120's since I was 21 years old! LOL