Ugh Tired Of Sounding Like A Nag!!

[misseyb73 6]

So my fiance has been so supportive with me throughout this whole thing...but lately his eating habits are off the charts its like he's trying to pick up my slack or something. (Like right now its also 11:30 pm and he's eating 3 hot dogs COVERED in mayo)...everytime I call anything to his attention he's all "ok mom" or "anything else you wanna nag about?"....so FRUSTRATED right now and not sure what to do! Any suggestions? Thanks for letting me rant.

[judych 225]

So my fiance has been so supportive with me throughout this whole thing...but lately his eating habits are off the charts its like he's trying to pick up my slack or something. (Like right now its also 11:30 pm and he's eating 3 hot dogs COVERED in mayo)...everytime I call anything to his attention he's all "ok mom" or "anything else you wanna nag about?"....so FRUSTRATED right now and not sure what to do! Any suggestions? Thanks for letting me rant.

thats rough. its a bit like that here sometimes... others having sweet biscuits, beer, chocolate. i just have to bit the bullet instead. lol.

[mylynn1377 93]

My fiance is being super supportive and honestly loves good wholesome food, whole grains, and fresh fruits and veggies so I am super excited. The problem we run into is on our splurge day when we go out to eat I just can't go completely nuts but his metabolism is the kind where he has to eat a lot of calories to stay the same weight. I mean his pants size are 1 inch bigger than they were in high school, he kills me with that metabolism! So he suggests things when we go out and I end up eating 6 oz of smoked beef, a large bkd potato with butter, and a huge piece of buttery garlic bread...and then I feel guilty when I add that up and he's in the kitchen looking for pudding!

[Kflower84 56]

I started introducing my husband to healthy things little by little. I started a while ago with milk. I used to buy (2) gallons 1- whole milk for him and 1 -1% or skim for me. Now I just buy the 1%. It's funny because the other day I asked him to bring a gallon of milk and he picked 2% by mistake and we were both like this milk taste funny, too strong or something....

Then it was sugar. I buy Splenda Sugar Blend and he loves it. Better than regular sugar.

I buy the sugar free fat free vanilla ice cream and he doesn't even notice the difference.

Pasta- I purchased the whole wheat before but not even I could eat it so I picked a box of this new brand of spaguettis called Ronzoni Smart Taste with 2.5x more Fiber that the regular one but without the cardboard taste.

I buy low sodium Beans, reduced or fat free cheese, organic eggs, turkey hot dogs, turkey bacon, turkey ground meat and so far he hasn't complained.

Actually, one day he did say something about the ground beef not tasting the same and I said thats because its turkey meat you been eating lately...lol

[SageTracey 608]

It's difficult when your partner isn't going through the same thing as you and even though he wants to be supportive, he probably doesn't realise the effect his choices are having on you. This is a learning phase for both of you.

Hang in there and hopefully he will come around as your new healthy eating habits become normal.

[judych 225]

My fiance is being super supportive and honestly loves good wholesome food, whole grains, and fresh fruits and veggies so I am super excited. The problem we run into is on our splurge day when we go out to eat I just can't go completely nuts but his metabolism is the kind where he has to eat a lot of calories to stay the same weight. I mean his pants size are 1 inch bigger than they were in high school, he kills me with that metabolism! So he suggests things when we go out and I end up eating 6 oz of smoked beef, a large bkd potato with butter, and a huge piece of buttery garlic bread...and then I feel guilty when I add that up and he's in the kitchen looking for pudding!

wow..lol.. how can you possible at that much?? it sounds like a lot .. but it does sound yummy.

[Lose100 178]

Don't frustrate yourself over his diet. Just be a good example to him and make small suggestions from time to time. If he feels that you are nagging, he won't hear you.

[TexasDy 53]

My husband has been kind of the same lately. I'm in the middle of my 2wk pre-op Atkins diet. He originally said he would try to do the atkins with me b/c it's such a pain in the butt - instead, he eats crakers, etc for Snacks right in front of me...

My advice is talk to your man. Not while he's eating. But in a soft, respectful way so it doesn't come across as nagging. That's what I did. My husband said he thought he was helping by getting it out of the house... /shrug

I know I'm a nagger, it's caused a lot of communication issues in my marriage and I have to fight it all the time. Making sure my approach and tone are respectful (that's what men want) goes a loooong way - even if I'm nagging about something =)

[honk 780]

Is he really eating more or are you just noticing because you are not? When I visit my sister (who weighs less than me) and my niece (literally a size 0-1) they eat constantly. This is hard for me because I want/need to eat my 3oz of Protein and veggies and then not eat again until the next meal. They will eat a bite here and there all afternoon. It can be hard when you are at someone elses house to say "I need to eat real meals not snack".

[mylynn1377 93]

wow..lol.. how can you possible at that much?? it sounds like a lot .. but it does sound yummy.

I'm not banded yet that's why. He even said that I've been doing so well with my diet do I think I still really need the band, and after dinner Friday night I looked at him and said "now do you understand why I need the band?" I am doing well on my own most days but if I don't stay strict and pay attention I will eat the house down, I've done it before.

Don't get me started on why we don't even buy brownie mix anymore...they are my crack really. I can eat half a pan no problem...which is a good chunk of the reason that I weigh over 300 lbs!

[uiwleelee 13]

So my fiance has been so supportive with me throughout this whole thing...but lately his eating habits are off the charts its like he's trying to pick up my slack or something. (Like right now its also 11:30 pm and he's eating 3 hot dogs COVERED in mayo)...every time I call anything to his attention he's all "ok mom" or "anything else you wanna nag about?"....so FRUSTRATED right now and not sure what to do! Any suggestions? Thanks for letting me rant.

That's rough. I know, because my boyfriend did some of the same things. During my pre-op diet, he ate a huge pizza by himself in front of me while I was eating my measly dry tuna and green Beans. It was torture. In my opinion, it comes down to respect. I had that discussion with my boyfriend, and he didn't do it again. I carefully laid out to him that I love food, and when he eats in front of me like that, knowing fully well that I can't eat it, it's tempting and torturous and extremely bad for my weight-loss goals. Honestly, it's disrespectful, too. I don't try to nag at him for what he eats, I just told him, "If you're going to eat like that, do it away from me."

He's been really good with it. I think one of the main reasons is because we have different sleeping schedules, too, so he'll pig out after I've already gone to sleep. He has altered his diet some since I started my journey, and now drinks Protein shakes and tries to have a home-cooked meal for lunch at work (we work together), instead of ordering a pizza or Chinese. Yesterday, my tummy was grumbling and he made some beef fajitas while I was still awake. Oh man, did I want some. But I didn't scold him because he was getting his Protein in, and I was happy for him. I can only be on liquids now since I'm only 2 days post-op, and I completely understand what I need to do.

So, in my opinion, if you explain to him that it's not what he eats that bothers you, but when he eats it (i.e., in front of you), then it should change his perspective a little more.

[readytogoforit 172]

You can only take care of your choices! I understand the frustration but nagging is not going to change him.

the only thing I worry about is that you join him, "eating large"! Breathe deep, vent with us but, take care of you, just you!!!!

Trust that I post this with a caring heart (for all of us)!

[kmt1973 92]

Nagging only ends with him wanting to get away from it. Would you want to be around someone that nags? You need to decide right away if you will accept that this is your lapband not his. Don't try to control his eating. He is grown. Quietly be an example, that goes way farther than nagging. (my aunt was a nagger, and she nagged her husband right out the door)