To Tell Or Not To Tell That You've Had Lapband Surgery Or Wls(Weight Loss Surgery)

[babydumplin1968 13]

Looking back.. I wish I wouldn't have told the few people that I did... of course I had to hear about the other folks in our district that did not succeed.... but moving foward...not letting the judging eyes keep me from my goal... :ph34r:

[lafaye999 32]

AlleyKat' date=' As someone who works in Human Resources I have a suggestion for you. I would go to your manager or HR and say "I am having a surgery (you don't need to tell them what due to HIPPA regulations) on X date and plan on returning to work after the weekend. If I am not feeling up to it I may need to take a few days off".

The fact that you will be taking the Friday off can and will lead to bad impressions if you can't be in on Monday. I can guarentee you that someone in management/HR/coworkers will infer you were so drunk/stoned over the weekend now you can't make it to work. I know you are thinking "no one will think that of ME". Yes someone will esp. someone who is a gossip and mean spirited. I work in HR and have heard it allllll. I sure your doctor will write you a note that you may need to be out of work for up to 5 days.

Free advice worth what you pay for it![/quote']

I also work in HR... I truly understand and respect everyone's opinion but I don't know everyone's struggle. There is a difference in privacy and secrets.

[AlleyKat 26]

AlleyKat, As someone who works in Human Resources I have a suggestion for you. I would go to your manager or HR and say "I am having a surgery (you don't need to tell them what due to HIPPA regulations) on X date and plan on returning to work after the weekend. If I am not feeling up to it I may need to take a few days off".

The fact that you will be taking the Friday off can and will lead to bad impressions if you can't be in on Monday. I can guarentee you that someone in management/HR/coworkers will infer you were so drunk/stoned over the weekend now you can't make it to work. I know you are thinking "no one will think that of ME". Yes someone will esp. someone who is a gossip and mean spirited. I work in HR and have heard it allllll. I sure your doctor will write you a note that you may need to be out of work for up to 5 days.

Free advice worth what you pay for it!

I love this suggestion but there is one issue, I AM the HR Manager! I'm not taking the Friday off. I worded it poorly, I'm off on the Friday is it is my regularly scheduled day off. If I can't make it in on the Monday I will call in but will likely end up working from home.

As the HR Manager I fully respect my employees right to privacy and I would never ask for details. However, my fellow managment team is not always the same way (Hence why I have a job lol). I fully plan on getting a doctors note for the time off but only using it if I need to.

[Jackie's girl 32]

I told my family and close friends and a few coworkers. Everyone was very supportive, but I am already getting side comments. When people try to make little comments that are supposed to be humor, but they are not. I am at the point where I don't care, but that was a process. I will tell anyone who I think it will help in the future, but for now, only those closest to me know. I am not ashamed, but it's personal private decision and I'm not advertising because it is nobody's business. But I did not tell anyone while I was deciding. I only told people after I had decided I was doing it. I did not want any influence.

[honk 780]

AlleyKat managers who don't understand boundries? Say it ain't so!

[AlleyKat 26]

AlleyKat managers who don't understand boundries? Say it ain't so!

LOL! oh the life of the HR Manager...

[Bjc1227 64]

I was thinking, I don't think I'd feel comfortable saying it's another type of surgery. I seems better to just say you're having surgery and if anyone asks tell them it's personal. From there they can think what they want. Why should we have to lie to satisfy busy bodies.

[MeredithMcFee 98]

Both my husband & I have been banded this year and have no problem telling people. I'm an open book for the most part and was happy to tell family & friends. These were people who were concerned with our weight and were happy to hear we were doing something about it and encourages us every time they see us. We even shared our surgeries with the restaurant we frequent. Reason being, we use to get everything from Soup to nuts to dessert and even a drink or two before dinner. Now we get a bowl of french onion soup or a salad and a burger without the roll! No alcohol, no Water, just soup/salad and a burger. If we don't finish and ask for a doggie bag, they're concerned if something was wrong with their food. Ha! So, we shared with a few of the wait staff who know us and told them the other night. They were releived to hear it wasn't their food as well as being happy for us despite losing some of our business!! It's ok, they won't starve, and neither will we. :-) Like someone else said here, if someone disagrees or thinks we took the easy way out, that's their problem, not ours.

[mrspopeye 69]

I told my husband, my mom and dad, and my 2 daughters. My oldest daughter told her best friend without my permission and I prompty sat her down and told her that it was not her secret to share. I think she understands now. I just recently told only one co-worker who is obese herself and I knew would be understanding. It is a privacy thing to me- I work in health care and it really does add another level of difficulty and problems if everyone knows. I told my boss I was having female surgery and I knew he would not ask questions if I said that.

[artvan35 7]

I only told my wife. I do not feel it is anyone else's business. Also I know people who have had weight loss surgery and people are supportive at first but then god for bid any weight is put back on or the wrong food is being eaten. I hear what people say and I was one of those people. I have an extremely supportive wife and I'm working out eating right is my response to when I lose weight. Good luck to all its everyone's one choice.

[difa 114]

Love this topic because I had a bit of a melt down over it last night. I've told my DH, my best friend (Who had the surgery) and her family, and my parents. That's it. I'm not embarassed, I have just been put down by people for so long about my weight that I don't need to be put down for this decision. I know I've made the right decision for me so I really don't care what anyone else thinks.

I wasn't going to tell my Dad because I know he is against it. I told him last night and now he refuses to talk to me. My husband doesn't fully support it either. He supports me but not me getting the surgery. I felt very alone last night.

I'm not planning on taking any time off of work as a have a desk job and I am off the day of surgery and two days after but if I need to. I plan on going with the hernia/gall bladder story too.

It's hard when you tell people you love and they don't support your decision.

On the other hand, my friend who had the surgery told everyone, posted it on Facebook etc. For the world to see. That's what she wanted to do and she is happy with her decision.

Everyone is different!

I'm sorry to hear this. My wife was banded last October, so she's my support system. I have no intentions on telling my parents or sibilings and it really makes no sense to tell any friends. My work thinks I'm going in for hernia repair.

[Lauracat 14]

I tell pepole start noticeing the way i was acting was diffent and i lost alot of weight so i told most 99% of pepole thinki great for you about 5% want to know my surgron so they can do it too. The one person i have not told is my brother as he always calls me names so i have not spoken to him in almost one year but when i do tell him i be close to goal weight and give him my suergons name and number becuse he goten very fat him self

[CherylAB 1]

I had my surgery in August 2009. I decided to be perfectly open about the whole thing, including my weight loss. On my whiteboard at work i kept how much weight i lost updated daily. It kept me honest. And when I started walking at lunch time -more and more people joined me. It got to be contageous.

[easyover 1]

I didn't want to tell anyone until I lost my weight. Before my surgery I didn't want to be distracted with any negativity. After the surgery I didn't want to be watched constantly & asked how much I am losing all the time. I really didn't want to be focused on any numbers. It was totally right for me. My husband knew & just 1 friend who is struggling with weight issues herself & who I knew would be supportive. Now that I've lost all my weight I have told a few more people. My best friend got to watch me deal with my lapband & she is going to get the procedure herself now that she saw my positive results.

[mommykristie 59]

I agree that this is a very personal decision. I chose to tell and I freely try to answer any questions that anyone has. In fact, I know of several that are considering or going through the insurance hoops right now. I think that some felt comfortable discussing it with me and being able to talk to me frankly. I even post a once a month full head to toe shot on my Fbook page to help document. I have had nothing but very positive experiences with others with lots of encouragement. Having said that, the one question that does start to irritate me somewhat is the standard " how much have you lost" For some reason that particular question, makes me pause because weight loss is so much more than just the pounds, but also the increased exercise, the healthier diet, the smaller clothing sizes, etc.