Perspective

[Marie3181 5]

I have seen posts that ask people to include their height so people can have perspective. This is really just a way for people to feel better about themselves beacuse they are less fat that someone else.

I don't doubt that there are some people on this forum who use stats like this or the number of fills they've had to help themselves feel better about their situations, but at the same time, I think it's important to remember that these stats absolutely do make a difference. There's a reason BMI exists and the requirements for surgery are based on that and not one certain number on the scale. Personally, I like to know heights because I like to kind of visualize people who post here - like reading a book and having a mental picture of what somebody looks like. Obviously, the number one reason there are so many bandsters here trying to lose weight is so we can be healthier. But I'll admit that I often compare myself to other people and other measurements of size. If I didn't, I wouldn't be chasing that elusive size 8 clothing, or admiring a girl at the gym with a cute figure and wishing I could look like that.

[Jessiebear 2]

5'4''

280 lbs.

pants - size 22W-24W

shirts - size 2x-3x

bra - 42DD

shoe - 8.5-9

[Kryssa 1]

5'3"

251 lbs.

22 pants

22/24 shirts because I won't wear anything that is remotely tight

42C bra

8 1/2W shoe

7 ring

[Parvathi 2]

5'7

168 lbs

Pants - 12 US (14 Aus)

Shirts - L

Bra - 36G

[NewSho 20]

This is a really relevant thread for me. This is exactly what I've been dealing with lately.

Just trying to type in my stats to answer the question - caused me to grit my teeth!

I am hard on myself but (I think) with good reason - this has been a long, tough, and largely unsuccessful fight. The sad reality is, after 5 years of this, I'm just down to a chunky 30 BMI. I think it's embarrassing that I am this size after working so hard for so long - so when I have "those days" that you speak of - imagine having 5 years of them!

Everyone's perspective is different. Gawd forbid there are actually people who think I look OK - bless their hearts. I don't have low self esteem nor do I think I compare myself unfavourably to others, but man I have got to get some of this weight off if I'm going to move forward. But after two long days straight of sitting in WLS surgeons' waiting rooms. I want to say the following:

OPEN LETTER

to pre-ops:

Thank for your compliments about how I look, but I am still fat...I am not in the waiting room for my follow ups because I'm through losing, I'm there because I'm desperately trying to find someone who can help me continue to lose this excess weight.

According to the CDC, NIH, and all the charts, with my 30 BMI I am STILL technically "obese" - and I am not happy about it. This is a rather sorry result after my 5 years of LapBanding so excuse me for not taking your compliments well. I appreciate it but I'm still having issues over here.

So I have no perspective on things - my (former) surgeon saying I look fine is really insulting to me - for this I paid (and am still paying, LOL) thousands of dollars? So when I look at my stats I just realize I have a long, hard way to go to ultimately win.

(Oh and my stats are closest to Kyleigh's above in terms of height and size. Except she actually looks great. I may be a wee bit lighter but we seem to wear similar sizes. The only difference is I've had 1 and 2/3 LapBand surgeries and a recent Tummy Tuck surgery which is still a work in progress. So frankly I'm way behind the curve... *sigh* :tired )

Happy Band Journeys To All...

{P.S. - I've posted before that I think there is a bit of what I call "Band Elitism" on various LapBand forums. And yes, sometimes people with new restriction or less restriction may inadvertently post things that can be interpreted (or even misinterpreted) as saying "see I'm not relying on the Band, I'm doing it more myself. I wil be successful because I know the band is just a tool, yadda yadda..." And to them I sometimes think: Fast forward 5 years people - anyone's super will power can wane somewhat, and then you might find yourself leaning a bit on the tool that you could so easily dismiss when you first got it. Might be something to think about.}

[Sandybells 0]

I just got my band Friday, Started preband 190

Stats

58 years old

5' 2"

184.7 lbs

size 2X

Bra 44B

Panties 12 TMI?

Tshirt 42-44

Bust 47

Waist 44

Hips 49

I have always been considered small boned which also makes a diff'

My weight is all on my belly which has always looked like I was ready to deliver...or burst...you pick?

Most embarrassing....not fitting in a booth at Applebee's!!!!

[Alexandra 55]

This is an interesting exercise, and I'll play. Sizes in women's clothes are, though, a very Fluid thing. I'll just put the sizes of my favorite brands of clothes, recognizing all along that there are other makes of clothes that in the same size would be impossible to get on.

5'10", 215 lbs

top--ladies 14 or L (Tall if available)

pants--XL or 16T (34" inseam if hemmed)

bra--38DD

panties--8

[YeeHaw 0]

I so agree with this thread! It is so true! I can honestly say that I used to weigh 175lbs, I wore a size 11 in Jrs, It was about a 8 or 10 in womens. People never believed me. One time I went to get my boaters license and the woman asked me," How much do you weigh?" You know so they can put it on your license. At that time I was 200lbs. I was so honest, and said 200, she looked at me and said mam, you do not weight that much, you probably weigh 155, I said I really do. She argued with me, I guess she thought I was stupid or something, so that is what she put on my license, 155lbs! yes I still have that license! I treasure it :confused: I just kidding about the treasuring it thing but I do still have it. Well that was 4 years ago and now I am 280lbs. and I wear a size 20 pant in Old Navy stuff. In Walmart stuff I can wear a 22W. I am right at 5'10", I wear a sixe XXL in certain tops, after I wash it, then it fits good, I do not wear anything that is even a little snug on my arms. In a regular tee shirt(what I have on now) I wear an XL. So to sum this all up.

5'10"

280lbs

Size 20 in Old Navy-Some 20's don't fit! Maybe it's a 20w that fits I don't know the difference.

Size XL or XXl in tops

Size 38 C in Bra maybe 40 C

Size 11 shoe

Size 10 ring

I know that I am overweight and unhealthy but I am saying that I am a very muscler person, and that really adds to my weight. I am a good weight at 170 or around that. My entire family is built very thick, is that the right word? You know what I mean. My brother is 6'5" and weighs 275, he does not have a pinch of fat on him!!! He works out alot too. My mom is 5'8" and 175, she wears a size 14 or 12.

I am scheduled to have lap band surgery on April 17th!!!!!! I am so excited! LBT has been so great for me, thank you everybody for sharing all your experiences so that others can learn and decide if it is right for them or not.

[FunnyDuddies 6]

sarah i had the same thing happen. she put 250 for me without asking. I laughed and took it back to her and said "this is wrong, I am actually 350"

They actually called the manager. The manager said that they had to put what I 'looked' like, not what I really was, and I 'looked' 250, not 350.

I left with a smile.

I used to body build before I got fat. I was very small, hard, and very muscular. That is all still there under this fat, so I am very dense. LOL I love saying that. I am sure there are a few people here that will chuckle with me, and at me.

[lianna 3]

5'4"

204 lbs

16-18 pants

1X shirt (18-20?)

38-40DD bra

size 6 ring

size 6 shoe

[vinesqueen 2]

Sorry but I don't agree with your premise, we need to feel comfortable with ourselves. If we continue to base our opinions of ourselves on the stats of other people we will always feel some pain. I have seen posts that ask people to include their height so people can have perspective. This is really just a way for people to feel better about themselves beacuse they are less fat that someone else.

TommyO you have managed to hit the mark and miss it at the same time. I think this is really a gurl issue, for many of us we really have no idea what we actaully look like, we have no idea what we can realistically look like. Many of us have been lied to and were told that we were fat, even when we were looking good and were at a healthy size and shape.

I think partly this is a way of reasuring ourselves that in our LBT community that we are not freaks, even when we are of extraordinary size. I find it a little comforting that I'm built close to what Jessebear has posted. That I'm not a freak, even though she and I won't be built similarly for long as she continues to lose weight.

I have never attached any sort of value, aside from the numerical value of a fill. I know that 2 ccs in my band is WAY too tight, but other people tolerate it just fine. I think the fill number gives many folks another way to not feel like a freak.

And you are so very right. We need to find ways to feel good about ourselves that don't tear others down. Other than a few anual explosions here at LBT, we are pretty much committed to buiding each other up. I don't ever get the vibe that people feel better about themselves here because they are less fat thank someone else. We feel better about oursleves because we are less fat than we used to be.

I want everyone to feel good about themselves because they deserve to, being fat does not make a person a bad person just as being thin does not imply any propencity to goodness.

This is exactly what I think TommyO. Perhaps it is time to bump that thread again.

[Bandster Brad 1]

6" 1', 245 pounds, size 36 levi's, XL shirt. I have a pair of 34's in reserve at all times, not sure if I will ever make it back to a "L" shirt.

Since losing this amount of weight, my clavicle and zyphoid process are prominent, :alien and I can easily feel three ribs on each side. My hip bones came back about 30 pounds ago!

[cashley 0]

Marimaru

My husband HATES it when I ask him-Am I bigger or smaller than her? He gets very annoyed. He will not answer anymore. If he does answer he tells me something I do not want to hear. Just out of spite.

I ask this question all the time - and it's not because I want to feel better / or worse then the person I'm pointing out. It's that the mirror lies.

Some mornings the mirror says - Uck! you look slochy fat and pale. Some morings it says.... not so bad!!!

If I see someone I'm about the same as (statistics wise) I can look at their picture and say... Not so bad!

Here's mine...

Height - 5'3

Weight - 211

Bottom Heavy - big thighs / Belly Medium Size / Big Arms

Size - 18 pants

Shirt - XL (Sometimes 2X since I like really baggy & I hate tight on arms)

Shoes - 7

hair - Long (heehee that's gotta add a pound or two)

Bra - 38D

[cashley 0]

You know what would be cool... is to see the size's before & after surgery

[FunnyDuddies 6]

FYI I am seeing a lot of people do this. I just wanted to make some sizing issues clear so that maybe some of you are skipping a size and need to make a change that wil make you look better. :confused:

The extra large sizing chart actually goes XL, 1XL, 2XL, 3XL and so on. A lot of people think that XL and 1XL are the same, but they are not. In fashion ordering, when clothes are ordered for a store, the buyer actually buys so many 0XL, 1XL, 2XL and so on and so forth. If an XL is too tight, but a 2XL is really baggy, go find a 1XL. Youmight find it to be a more flattering fit and an easier piece of clothing to wear. Also keep in mind, the baggier the clothing, the heavier we look. Lets not wear tarps people. It is unflattering.

Sorry folks. My new job has taught me so much, and I really want to share so much. It is amazing how much it has made me look better.