Does Anyone Else Feel This Way??

[Sojourner 2,446]

Okay, I'll start off my saying I love my band. Was banded in October and have lost over 70 lbs so far including the 9 I lost on the preop diet. Life is good...I'm the thinnest I've ever been, in the best shape of my life. I ran a 10 mile race and I have a half marathon coming up next month. I bought a pair of freaking size 10 pants for Pete's sake, which I have never done in my life. I only have 30 lbs left to my goal weight. I love my band and would do it over in a heartbeat.

Of course there's a but....

I miss eating, the way I used to eat. I miss going to the Outback and eating bread, and salad, and the big onion and steak and fries. And it's not that I'm starving...I have enough restriction that I feel full off of a pretty small amount of food.

I miss just "grabbing a quick bite" which is not even an option anymore. I just want to eat something without chewing it to death. And I know some people say they enjoy food even more now because they take the time to savor each bite, but I like it far less. To me, food chewed to the consistency of appleasuce tastes almost putrid in my mouth at times...hell I don't even like appleasauce! Add that to the fact that it's usually cold by the time I get done. Food is not enjoyable to me, which is depressing because it used to be so enjoyable. The exception, of course, is food like ice cream, chocolate and chips that are so easy to eat and as enjoyable as ever, but of course I try not to eat those too much.

I realize it's all in my head, and my therapist and I are working on it ...just wanted to see if anyone else felt the same way. Like I said,I'm happy to be banded, happy with my success so far, and I would take being at goal weight, healthy (and hopefully wearing a size 8) over a huge meal at the Outback, but still....

I was happy to read that you are working with a therapist to address your continuing issues with food. Though your weight loss has progressed impressively, your relationship and beliefs about food do not seem to have made the same rate of progress.

Revising your thinking about food, and the requirements for your diet with your band has to happen before you can truly be in a different place emotionally. I have never felt that having to chew many times, taking small bites, and restricting the type of foods I can have were an imposition, or that I was "missing out" with the changes I chose to make with eating. These action items were part of what I still consider to be the opportunity to have better health.

I had to wait an extra year for my surgery for a variety of reasons, none of which were planned or avoidable, so when I was finally cleared medically, I had no reservations to proceed. I believe that most bandsters have some pre-op questions to themselves about if they are making the right choice. There is no easy answer, but I believe that the answer is tied to one's priorities.

At the Southern Woman's Show 2 summers ago, I had the good fortune to encounter someone who had been banded the previous fall. She helped me place my concerns in the proper perspective: which is more important to you? Being able to eat anything you want to for your meals covering several minutes a day during meals, or having some rules for those meals which require attention and mindful eating? It was a no brainer after that for me.

We should eat to live, not the other way around. The longer you hold onto your flawed thinking, the more of a negative attitude towards diet compliance you will have.

The things you mentioned that you disliked are the same things which got most all of us to the point where we had bariatric surgery. You cannot expect a sustained weight loss without increasing resentment towards compliance unless you redefine for yourself what your relationship with food needs to be.

You have done so well with your weight loss...I hope you modify your beliefs about food. and let go of the ones which got you to your band surgery. Food is not your friend...and in many ways one can be addicted to food in the same way as one can be to drugs or co-dependent relationships.

Wishing you continued success with your weight loss journey.

[Toddy 758]

Pre-band, when you go to eat something you really, REALLY love, you get the most enjoyment out of the first two or three bites, and then it's just gobbling up the rest out of habit. Post-band, you can still enjoy those two or three bites, and when the enjoyment lessens, you just quit eating. The only thing I've encountered that I absolutely can't eat is really soft fresh bread. Do I miss it? Yes, until the rest of the meal arrives and then I'm fine.

I actually revel in leaving food on my plate at a restaurant -- makes me want to do the happy dance right there on the table! I believe obesity is so rampant today because we have become accustomed to eating such outrageously huge quantities of food, which our body DOES NOT need!! Chewing to eternity on those first two or three bites of something I love is just prolonging the enjoyment. Once the food gets cold because it takes so long to eat, it's not hard to quit eating because it's no longer good.

[JanB23 23]

Pre band i would eat what ever i wanted whenever i wanted to the point that i had no special foods that excited me. I had funny little habits, like i had to put two marshmallows in my mouth at once or i wasn't happy, i had to have equal amounts of food in each side of my mouth. Bizarre! I went with the band because i could have it removed if i missed eating too much. At times i do miss it but mostly i dont. I am lucky i can eat most things, i just cant eat a lot. I now have special occasion foods again that excite me, i get really hungry (this is hard to explain because i don't actually feel hungry) before i eat and i really enjoy what i do eat. I love my band and wouldn't have it removed for anything....

[NurseDana 32]

Thanks to all who replied! Glad to know I'm not alone. To any not banded yet...do not let me scare you off! Like I said, I love it and would do it again in a heartbeat. It's just a struggle at times, like most things in life. But the benefits far outweigh any negatives I have encountered so far.

[readytogoforit 172]

I have to remind myself what is real truth is. yes, I ate things that I thought tasted good BUT I couldn't walk without getting winded, I looked like a slob & my self esteem was in the bottom of a potato chips bag.

I do not think the food that I thought was sooooo good is a fair tradeoff for how well I feel now!

I never want to go back, it is an illusion that we are missing something. Think more clearly!

[Jen75 33]

I was happy to read that you are working with a therapist to address your continuing issues with food. Though your weight loss has progressed impressively' date=' your relationship and beliefs about food do not seem to have made the same rate of progress.

Revising your thinking about food, and the requirements for your diet with your band has to happen before you can truly be in a different place emotionally. I have never felt that having to chew many times, taking small bites, and restricting the type of foods I can have were an imposition, or that I was "missing out" with the changes I chose to make with eating. These action items were part of what I still consider to be the opportunity to have better health.

I had to wait an extra year for my surgery for a variety of reasons, none of which were planned or avoidable, so when I was finally cleared medically, I had no reservations to proceed. I believe that most bandsters have some pre-op questions to themselves about if they are making the right choice. There is no easy answer, but I believe that the answer is tied to one's priorities.

At the Southern Woman's Show 2 summers ago, I had the good fortune to encounter someone who had been banded the previous fall. She helped me place my concerns in the proper perspective: which is more important to you? Being able to eat anything you want to for your meals covering several minutes a day during meals, or having some rules for those meals which require attention and mindful eating? It was a no brainer after that for me.

We should eat to live, not the other way around. The longer you hold onto your flawed thinking, the more of a negative attitude towards diet compliance you will have.

The things you mentioned that you disliked are the same things which got most all of us to the point where we had bariatric surgery. You cannot expect a sustained weight loss without increasing resentment towards compliance unless you redefine for yourself what your relationship with food needs to be.

You have done so well with your weight loss...I hope you modify your beliefs about food. and let go of the ones which got you to your band surgery. Food is not your friend...and in many ways one can be addicted to food in the same way as one can be to drugs or co-dependent relationships.

Wishing you continued success with your weight loss journey. [/quote']

Well said!

[gmmcginnis 0]

Yep..I understand..Im still trying to tell myself EAT TO LIVE dont LIVE TO EAT:)

[Bel12 13]

I love food but I love my health more. Not banded yet but I think about when I had kids and brig able to run around with them and play is worth given up McDonalds for life or soda. Im in constant back pain and I would give up bread to be pain free

[jmschoc 7]

There's allot of good food choices out there that if you take the time you'll find that you can still enjoy food I'm not banded yet hopefully in 30 days but am very happy with weight loss before surgery.