Anume 937 314 Posted April 15, 2012 Okay my husband is so against weight loss surgery. He is not supportive at all at first he said he'll leave me if i go ahead with it ... He changed his mind after he seen I wasn't gonna change my mind but now if I bring it up he don't wanna hear it. But the only other people who know is my mom, both of my sisters, one of my cousin, and my dad. And they are totally supportive Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ready4changein2011 70 Posted April 15, 2012 I am 6 weeks out now and my hubby was the same way but I had to do what was right for me. If he is unsecure he needs to fix that is what I told him. My mom and daughter was with me on surgery day not him ooh boo hoo. I dont understand what the problem is with these guys. If he has been good to you, then whats the deal if not then maybe that's the problem. Mine has come around some since surgery, I'm independent and he knows that. When you have ongoing health issues (sleep apnea, high blood pressure, high cholesterol), no one has to deal with this but you. Now that Im losing weight my doc says my bp has improved and im so looking forward to not taking 3 bp meds a day and sleeping with this machine every night. If your hubby is scared for you that's understandable but must realize are we gonna let this weight kill us or are we gonna do something about it. If he doesn't want to talk about it see if he will go to a seminar for lapband education. Wishing you luck and support. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
2012Enoughisenough 5 Posted April 15, 2012 Sorry to hear about your husband. You have to do what you need to do to be healthy. He will come around and be glad yo Sent from my iPad using LapBandTalk Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
2012Enoughisenough 5 Posted April 15, 2012 Sorry to hear about your husband. You have to do what you need to do to be healthy. He will come around and be glad yo Sent from my iPad using LapBandTalk Did it Sent from my iPad using LapBandTalk Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
adorkbl 156 Posted April 15, 2012 Maybe he is scared and is choosing the wrong way to show that? I agree with the previous poster... maybe have him go to a seminar with you? I am sorry he is not being supportive. I don't know if I would have went through with mine without hubby's support. Maybe letting him know how important his support is? There is no excuse for ultimatums in a relationship. You know your husband, so you know best how to talk to him. He needs to put his big boy pants on and be supportive and present for you. I hope he comes around!! Support is soooo essential to this process. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anume 937 314 Posted April 15, 2012 Thx for all y'all advise Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anume 937 314 Posted April 15, 2012 Keeping it real he just thinking about how long he'll be w/o sex!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
2012Enoughisenough 5 Posted April 15, 2012 Girl that is keeping it real. Lol I hope for his sake it does not take too long Sent from my iPad using LapBandTalk Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tym4me 206 Posted April 16, 2012 Lol plz i draggedit out for the break Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
marielalora 17 Posted April 16, 2012 My hubby was just like tha but they selffish they just ado t want c u look good n nun I mean my is like tha cuz he said y u go do thaniblove u like tha but when he mad he tell me go lose some weath but now I done with tha drama I the one tha don't want hear it n go thing about my self n me n me tha all idc what the rest thing about...!i get u back girl do what make u happy vuz at the end u are the one tha go e happy not him Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carriedaway78 0 Posted April 16, 2012 It sucks that he can't be supportive inbyour efforts to get healthy. But you have to do what is best for you! If he loves you, he will come around. Don't let anyone deter you from success! :-) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
soccer*mom 5 Posted April 16, 2012 My husband is not supportive either. He is the only one who knows. I have 3 kiddos-13 year old twins and an 11 year old and I've chosen not to tell them either. My husband and children are all normal weight and very active. I am still ashamed that I can't do this on my own. Hubby thinks I could if I really tried. I've lost the weight before (more than once) but keep re-gaining it (plus some). I feel like a failure but am determined to do this for ME. I wonder how many have done this successfully, without support on the home front? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kate rules 43 Posted April 16, 2012 Hi soccer mom. My story wasn't much different from yours. My husband tolerated my desire and eventual surgery but did not really provide the moral support (didn't want to talk about it at all). This was hard but when he saw me working so hard in my preop diet he changed his tune and saw I wasn't heading for the quick fix this time. U made real lifestyle changes. You may wish to consider a therapist for support through this process. You will be going through many different changes that will affect you in ways you may not expect. Would be good to be in a good state of mind when him by comes around. Just a thought .... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
soccer*mom 5 Posted April 16, 2012 Kate-Sadly, I am sure there are lots of us out there. I probably should see a therapist. My surgery is on Wednesday and along with the anxiety, I am feeling resentment toward my husband. He refused to go to a seminar, read any of the literature I gave him, or do any research on his own. I need to get past this and focus on ME and and what I need to do to be successful. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites