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Success - Sometimes Bitter Sweet?



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Really? I have found the complete opposite, people can be vety hostile, assuming I am vain, trying to steal their husbands or that i will hog all he male attention. Even my friends make jokes about how they dont want to sit next to me at dinner becase i mak them feel like they eat like pigs.

Overall, i felt a lot less "different" when i was a dumpy bmi 36 30 something mum of young kids. People obviously feel threatened by living proof that obesity is often simply a lazy choice and that a determined person CAN simpky decide noto be like that any more.

Did you just call us all lazy pigs? Really? You got a lap band too.

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This is an interesting subject. Ive been thin and ive been heavy , and yes ive been treated better when im thin. Sad but true. I cant change peoples perceptions about me based on my weight. I will say this , since ive lost some weight i dress better, put more effort into my appearance, and have a lot more energy and am happier because i feel better too. as a result people respond to all of that, and so yes im treated better. I also think people treat others well when they treat themselves better. By being banded, im eating better and exercising, so when other see me treat myself good , they treat me good too. Just an opinion. my hubby loves me thru thick and thin, but it is nice to have people be complimentary to me.

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Have been lucky I guess, no issues that I have noticed. Well maybe I did get a couple seconds looks from several young hot bikers last time we were out riding. The other night we were at dinner with family, I got a stuck (green pepper) and had to leave the table. When I came back my nephew asked; Would you still it now that you know all the problems? ABSOLUTELY !!! An occasional stuck is the least of my problems....the fact that at a recent family funeral no one recognized me was the icing on the cake, that I did not eat.

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Really? I have found the complete opposite' date=' people can be vety hostile, assuming I am vain, trying to steal their husbands or that i will hog all he male attention. Even my friends make jokes about how they dont want to sit next to me at dinner becase i mak them feel like they eat like pigs.

Overall, i felt a lot less "different" when i was a dumpy bmi 36 30 something mum of young kids. People obviously feel threatened by living proof that obesity is often simply a lazy choice and that a determined person CAN simpky decide noto be like that any more.[/quote']

Honey, they are jealous of the amazing changes your making! You stand proud of the sexy & confident person you are. And sorry to say but real friends don't sabotage their friends goals. A joke is when everyone laughs because it's funny& no one is made to feel insecure, self conscious or lesser than another.

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    • BabySpoons

      Sometimes reading the posts here make me wonder if some people just weren't mentally ready for WLS and needed more time with the bariatric team psychiatrist. Complaining about the limited drink/food choices early on... blah..blah...blah. The living to eat mentality really needs to go and be replaced with eating to live. JS
      · 2 replies
      1. Bypass2Freedom

        We have to remember that everyone moves at their own pace. For some it may be harder to adjust, people may have other factors at play that feed into the unhealthy relationship with food e.g. eating disorders, trauma. I'd hope those who you are referring to address this outside of this forum, with a professional.


        This is a place to feel safe to vent, seek advice, hopefully without judgement.


        Compassion goes a long way :)

      2. BabySpoons

        Seems it would be more compassionate not to perform a WLS on someone until they are mentally ready for it. Unless of course they are on death's door...

    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        I had about 6 months between deciding to do surgery and getting scheduled. I came across the book The Pound of Cure by Dr. Matthew Weiner, a bariatric surgeon in Arizona, and started to implement some of the changes he recommended (and lost 13 lbs in the process without ever feeling deprived). The book is very simple, and the focus is on whole, plant based foods, but within reason. It's not an all or nothing approach, or going vegan or something, but focuses on improvement and aiming for getting it right 80-90% of the time. His suggestions are divided into 12 sections that you can tackle over time, perhaps one per month for a year if a person is just trying to improve nutrition and build good habits. They range from things like cutting out artificial sweetener or eating more beans to eating a pound of vegetables per day. I found it really effective pre-surgery and it's an eating style I will be working to get back to as I am further out from surgery and have more capacity. Small changes you can sustain will do the most for building good habits for life.

      2. Theweightisover2024🙌💪

        That sounds awesome. I'll have to check that out thanks!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
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    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
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