Am I Saying 'good Bye' To A Best Friend?...food!

[Mega_100 146]

OK, so I have been researching LBS for a couple months now, I'm going to an LBS seminar tomorrow, I feel like I'm inching closer to LBS...and I can't stop thinking about saying 'good bye' to an addiction I've had my whole life! I, like many others here, have tried several diets and end up gaining everything back. I'm not going to lie, I am feeling like LBS is a 'magic pill' that is going to make everything better <insert my understanding that this is def not the case.> I am someone who responds to before and after photos like I respond to seeing a double cheeseburger--I want that! This is the last stitch effort to MAKE myself eat better and make better choices...BUT I can't stop thinking about how life-altering this will be. I LOVE food. I associate it with good times, celebrations, rewards, summertime, fun...So, how do I say good bye? My thought is to use LBS as a tool to disassociate food and good things, will that work? Am I being niave? Is LBS right for me or am I setting myself up for disappointment and failure?

[morelgirl 177]

That's a complex question! Only you can decide whether or not you're ready, but I will tell you that you can MAKE lap band work for you as long as you commit to working the lap band. That doesn't mean saying goodbye to food, just sitting it down for a serious discussion and then going to couples' counseling with it!

No one can "give up" food; we need it to survive! And even giving up certain foods is difficult and part of what makes diets fail for 95% of us. That's the reason we turn to lap band. What we CAN do, though, is change our relationship with food. The band can and does help with this, but it won't do it alone. You also have to work on your mind set. You need to start seeing that while food can and should bring us pleasure and satisfaction, it isn't the key to those feelings. We can experience both in the absence of food as well. Good times and celebrations include food, but also good company and people we care about. Rewards can be other things that being us pleasure, from massages to pedicures to a good book or a planned "day without chores." Summer can be about good weather and outdoor activities and fun can be about whatever makes us smile and laugh. Food makes me smile occasionally, but I don't really get its jokes!

Now, it's easy to say all those things, but harder to accomplish some of them. If you have trouble with them and it's at all possible for you, I do recommend seeing a therapist who specializes in disordered eating to help with the process (check out http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org to find one). You don't need to actually have a recognized eating disorder to benefit from their expertise. Not only can they help you understand why you feel the way you do about food, they can also help you develop concrete strategies to reshape your behavior.

Best of luck! I'm certain you can do anything you set your mind to!

[B-52 7,113]

I always draw criticism for this, but I have made an effort to make food out to be something that can do me more harm than good.

And I used to love food also. But right now it is way down on my lists of things for me to concern myself about.

It did make me fat and unhealthy after all.

It does amaze me, how websites with people who have the common problem of being morbidly obese, to the point where they needed surgery, can spend the majority of their time talking about food, recipes, things that are "yummy", etc.

I like it when someone can take a food item, that is the worst thing you can eat, and figure out a way of duplicating it to make it taste and look just like the original, but with no fat and low calories. Say strawberry short cake for example.

To me, it still is the original to the brain. I would rather change my tastes and views bout the cake and be rid of that habit for good.

[Cazzy 725]

food really isnt your 'friend' if my best friend made me as ill as food did i would never want to see them again !.. we have to form new relationships with food not hanker after the old one, the moments u highlight in your post are about family, friends moments in time that u will still enjoy even if your relationship with food has changed..food now has a part in my life which i enjoy, but it has to be kept in check, not allowed to creep back in to controlling my life.. I control food now and at the moment its doing as it should

It really is good to go through a day and not have food keep popping into my head, i think of other things now and i like the freedom it brings .. good luck and i wish you every success !

[NWgirl 574]

I think that as long as you understand what gastric banding entails and are ready to accept those life changes, you will be okay. Some people cannot eat certain foods, while others can/

The only thing I've heard is that if you have a junk food addiction, it is something the band may not be able to help with. Most of these are considered sliders, and will slide right past your pouch, making you miss that feeling of fullness. You also need to know your triggers and be mindful. I know, and have known for a long time, that there are some foods that I never feel full on. Cereal is one of these, no matter if I eat one bowl or five.

In the same vain, you also need to be committed to eating Protein first and eating enough of it. My dietician told me that protein should be based on weight, and you should calculate your weight x 0.3= how many grams you should receive daily. You should also try and stay away from mushy and softer foods to get the most out of the band.

I watched a clip from Dr. Oz about two gals with Lapband, and one girl was still eating mostly yogurt and pudding and smooth Soup 6 months out. These are not solids and will not stay in the pouch as long.

[TracieR 88]

I mourned food my first 2 months. I literally grieved it. I was not prepared for it. It by far was the hardest part of my journey. The fact that you are thinking about this before going to your seminar is a great thing. I so didn't prepare my head for this change. It is still something I am struggling with, the head issues I have associated with food. But you know what a year later and I can pretty much eat anything I want (I know that is not true of everyone) but a smaller portion size. I choose to eat healthy, low carb, high Protein items. I choose not to eat bread, rice, or Pasta. I do that because I know those are my triggers. Now that being said I am not perfect and I do treat myself every once in a while to something I am craving. I have learned that if I don't have what I really want I feel deprived and eat more. At the end of the day this is a lifestyle change and you have to do what works best for you. Good Luck to you!

[B-52 7,113]

I mourned food my first 2 months. I literally grieved it. I was not prepared for it. It by far was the hardest part of my journey. The fact that you are thinking about this before going to your seminar is a great thing. I so didn't prepare my head for this change. It is still something I am struggling with, the head issues I have associated with food. But you know what a year later and I can pretty much eat anything I want (I know that is not true of everyone) but a smaller portion size. I choose to eat healthy, low carb, high Protein items. I choose not to eat bread, rice, or Pasta. I do that because I know those are my triggers. Now that being said I am not perfect and I do treat myself every once in a while to something I am craving. I have learned that if I don't have what I really want I feel deprived and eat more. At the end of the day this is a lifestyle change and you have to do what works best for you. Good Luck to you!

There is a support group that I know of, where all they do is talk about food. They even TAKE PICTURES of food!!!!

I wish they could hear what you just said, because when I brought it up hey let he arrows fly!

[Mega_100 146]

Now, it's easy to say all those things, but harder to accomplish some of them. If you have trouble with them and it's at all possible for you, I do recommend seeing a therapist who specializes in disordered eating to help with the process (check out http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org to find one). You don't need to actually have a recognized eating disorder to benefit from their expertise. Not only can they help you understand why you feel the way you do about food, they can also help you develop concrete strategies to reshape your behavior.

Best of luck! I'm certain you can do anything you set your mind to!

Thank you to everyone, this is all very insightful! I have looked around for a local therapist to see if maybe that would help me understand and ammend my relationship with food, but I have come up short. Usually when you Google 'eating disorder' the overweight, food addict gets left out, I've found. Thanks @morelgirl for this link, I will definitely check it out. I have heard on some forums that the psych eval to get this proceedure can be lacking and that really surprises me since it is such a cerebral thing for me. I know that I will struggle with this if I get the surgery, so it's nice to see that I can come here for support!

[pripri 1]

my greatest advice to give would be

"eat to live, dont live to eat"

[Mega_100 146]

I just came across this while ready LapBandGal's blog and it seemed absolutley appropriate for this topic.:

"I am thankful that I have learned:

• My food choices are never, ever going to fix my deeper problems.
  
• Food is not going to make me blissfully happy.
  
• Food is not my friend.
  
• Food is not going to make me feel less stressed about the business that is life.
  
• Food is not going to give me the courage to change things in my life.
  
• Food is not meant to be an escape from reality."
  

Reading this makes me hope to accomplish these sentiments some day...

[Kygie 3]

I have friends that when I say I can't eat cakes, donuts, pastries, steak, etc...they feel sorry for me...At the end of the day, being alive is so much more important. I struggle with the emotional eating and you can easily cheat the band...so then you are cheating yourself. Instead of cheating myself out of something I really feel like, I have it, in moderation if It looks after my band and doesn't cause me to PB as donuts n steak would do...I eat a casserole with beef in it and I feel satisfied. I do love the yummyness of food, but I am learning that food is more about sustenance, than living or enjoying it. In saying that I have taken the approach not to "diet" I have changed my choices, we buy low fat, low sugar things, but I don't beat myself up if I have something fattening. It is about balance!!!! I craved to eat food....after 2 weeks on the liquids I couldn't wait for something mushy....but I have not one regret. I have had a very bumpy road but I love my Lola!!!

[Cazzy 725]

Instead of concentrating on what you cant eat people should stay focused on what they can eat and enjoy that ..

[TracieR 88]

Instead of concentrating on what you cant eat people should stay focused on what they can eat and enjoy that ..

I was just telling someone yesterday that I am so much more into cooking now that I have my band. They couldn't understand that but it is true. I find healthy things that i love and get excited to cook and eat. I now look forward to the new recipe I found for a lentil stew with quinoa. I truly enjoy finding healthy recipes that use my new found "culinary skills" haha!!

[Cazzy 725]

I was just telling someone yesterday that I am so much more into cooking now that I have my band. They couldn't understand that but it is true. I find healthy things that i love and get excited to cook and eat. I now look forward to the new recipe I found for a lentil stew with quinoa. I truly enjoy finding healthy recipes that use my new found "culinary skills" haha!!

A big Ditto

[Mega_100 146]

I was just telling someone yesterday that I am so much more into cooking now that I have my band. They couldn't understand that but it is true. I find healthy things that i love and get excited to cook and eat. I now look forward to the new recipe I found for a lentil stew with quinoa. I truly enjoy finding healthy recipes that use my new found "culinary skills" haha!!

This is great! I love finding new recipes to try--I love to cook. Sometimes I struggle with the fact that the easiest/cheapest recipes to master are the least healthy. ugh...but <3 Ky <3, I am hoping I have your mentality after I get the band. I have done a lot of self-reflection in the past 2 months of researching the LB. I have finally found that, while I started out being concerned that I wouldn't get the foods I oh-so-much-enjoy, now I am focusing on how the LB might help me adjust my relationship with food. One of the greatest things I could gain from getting the LB is no longer eating because I "want" food, but because I "need" food as a fuel, not because it makes me feel better.